


Moments in Time

by Nightfrost



Category: Fate/Grand Order, Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood and Violence, Childhood Trauma, Didn't realize there was a tag for this., I Don't Even Know, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Multi, Non-Chronological, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Out of Character, Past Child Abuse, Probably out of character though, Self-Indulgent, Typical me, Vitriolic Best Buds, Writing by the seat of my pants
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-11
Updated: 2018-06-25
Packaged: 2019-04-21 08:37:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 86
Words: 73,772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14281125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightfrost/pseuds/Nightfrost
Summary: Interconnected, non-chronological drabbles set in an Alternate Universe of Fate Grand Order.What if Gudao wasn't the only Master that was rendered in a comatose state Lev's bombing of Chaldea?Spoilers for the story.





	1. Failure (Kadoc)

**Author's Note:**

> An experiment writing from various points of view from characters with different mindsets.
> 
> The divergence point is set many years before the main plot of Fate Grand Order.

Kadoc sighed as he stared out the window of one of the large rooms in Chaldea, watching the snow fall with a book in his hands. He always felt like such a failure, and it was worse ever since he arrived at the facility. His new colleagues were as cold as the continent this building was situated on. He closed his book, not caring to mark his spot: he read this one several times already anyway.

He brought his knees up to his chest, hugging them close as he buried his head, not letting anyone see the tears threatening to fall. Even if this room was barely used, he didn’t want to give them another reason to dislike him, because “magi didn’t show emotions”. Why was he here? He wasn't smart like Daybit, or powerful like Kirschtaria, or possessing some special Mystic Eyes like Ophelia… and everyone made sure he knew it.

They never told him why it was so important that he, a bad magus with only average magical power, be here that he wasn't allowed to say no, or leave the facility at all… It felt like a prison. He didn't bother trying to send mail, he was sure his best friend wouldn't be at the Clock Tower anymore once they realized he was gone. Taken.

The only person who he never felt like a failure around wasn’t here… He missed his best friend… He didn't even realize that their friendship satisfied something in him he never had noticed until they were gone: loneliness. Before he met them, he was used to it, so used to it he never noticed how much it gnawed at him until he met them… Were they even still alive? The last time he saw them they simply said they had to go somewhere and would be back in a month, but they wouldn’t tell him why they were leaving… and now…

“ _ Take care while we’re gone Kadoc, we’re fond of you, and we didn't think we could be fond of anyone. _ ”

Hiccuping softly as he remembered the last thing they said to him, the words settling in his chest in a curl of warmth. He squeezed his legs tightly, as if to capture that feeling and never let it go. He wanted to see them again… before, he left a note saying “ _ Taken. Chaldea Security Organization. I miss you. See you soon... _ ” the only thing he had time to write before they made him leave the one place, (person) that felt like home.

It was stupid… that a tiny two bed dormitory felt more like home than his actual house just because his roommate accepted him for who he was. They even said they were fond of him, and from someone like them, that meant so much.

It’s been over a year and even though several other people have come into the facility, none of them were his friend. It was hard, so hard for him to stay optimistic, what if he never saw them again? He wouldn’t be able to tell them how much they meant to him… The first person that didn’t care if he had only average magical power, if he was a bad magus, if he was a disappointment. That meant so much to him, and he worried because he was afraid to speak up (another failure…) they wouldn’t ever know that.

The tears threatening to fall spilled over, dripping down onto his lap, and his heart clenched in his chest, twisting and squeezing. His shoulders shook and heaved, but there was nothing to fill in the emptiness.

“ _ Please… If there is a god… Please… let me see them again… Let me see them one more time so I can tell them how much they mean to me… Please… please… _ ”


	2. Reach (Arthur)

Arthur stood at the corner of his Master’s room, watching him sleep. He said there was no danger here, but as he said it, Arthur got a memory of fire and explosions and alarms and death, and it was in this building. The fear was so thick in the air the only reason Arthur knew it wasn't reality was because the shift was so jarring. He had a feeling his Master was trying to convince himself even more than the heroic spirit.

He watched as his Master groaned softly, reaching out for a pillow, and tangling his fingers in it briefly, before pulling away. His Master always seemed to be reaching for something. He recalled when he was summoned, his Master’s fingers curled around air, as if holding something invisible. It seemed to be an unconscious action whenever his Master was afraid or anxious, Arthur recalled seeing the same behavior at other times as well. When someone was making fun of his Master for having little magical power. When someone was jeering that his Master had no friends. That last one caused his Master’s eyes to water, which lead to more jeering about how a magus doesn't show their emotions.

His Master was constantly reaching out, and Arthur wondered who or what his Master was constantly searching for comfort from.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was written a couple of months before the Anastasia Lostbelt was released, so she's not Kadoc's servant here because I didn't feel confident in developing a character with almost no known personality. Da Vinci's and Mash's description of Kadoc was good enough for me.


	3. Amuse (Gilgamesh)

Amusement. That's all it was to Gilgamesh, the King of Heroes. At first, he was amused by this tiny mongrel who didn't simply roll over and die when confronted with a superior force. They fought back, even if the chance for victory was slim, and somehow managed to tease out a miracle. It reminded him of his people, unlike the other mongrels of this era. Since they reminded him of his people, it was only right that they became his property as well.

His property didn't just hide behind him after he was summoned, they took fate into their own hands and worked hard to win the war. Of course, he still did most of the work, but they helped out a bit.

He decided to stay behind after the end of the war, mentally putting this person a step above the rest of the mongrels in this era. They kept impressing him after all, and using his right as a king, he rewarded them. After all, it would look bad on him if he claimed them as his vassal and then they went off and died easily.

Luckily, they were amusing. He got visions of his new vassal curled around another mongrel, a pale mongrel with piercings. This other mongrel seemed incredibly attached to his vassal, and surprisingly, his vassal seemed to be similarly attached. At least, he couldn't think of why else his vassal kept searching for this mongrel once they found he was gone.

He would have to judge this mongrel in person, to see if he was worthy to associate with his vassal.

“Yo Archer! Earth to Archer!”

His musings were broken by the very person he was thinking about. He looked up to see his vassal waving a bag at him.

“Fool!” He roared as he strode to them. “Didn’t I say to let me, the king, handle it?!”

His vassal blinked as they fell in step next to him. “Eh, the king would deign to wait in a long checkout line? I doubt that. We can't accomplish our goals as easily from prison, you know? You’d probably get us cited for a public disturbance.”

Gilgamesh scoffed. “So you're still determined to find that mongrel of yours?”

His vassal nodded, dark hair bobbing in the wind. “Yeah. We mean, you don't have to come, we’ve heard you complain a ton about this place.”

Gilgamesh heard the undertone of “ _You can just return to the Throne if you’re bored, can't you?_ ”

“It is unbecoming of the king to abandon his subjects, we’ve discussed this already.”

His vassal tilted their head. “Eh, when did we become your subjects again? Weren't we still your property? Did we get promoted?”

Gilgamesh scoffed. “I, as the king, can call you whatever I want, whenever I want!”

The look his vassal gave him spoke volumes as to how little they believed him.

“Sure… Anyway, we found out where this place is, it's on freaking Antarctica.”

Gilgamesh frowned as he searched his knowledge from the Grail. “Isn't that place uninhabitable to humans?”

His vassal sighed. “Usually, yes, but they must be using magecraft or something. I'm not sure how we can get there… We’ll have to think of something…”

As they turned the corner, Gilgamesh suddenly got a terrible feeling. Without thinking, he opened up the Gate of Babylon, and forced his vassal through and closed it.

“ _What the hell? Archer, what was that for?!_ ”

His vassal yelled through the mental link.

“ _**Silence**! It's a really bad feeling, that is all! _ ”

His vassal quieted down, just as the world was consumed in flames. As Gilgamesh watched, skyscrapers fell and the world was torn asunder, and the mongrels screamed, their voices reaching a crescendo before dying off.

“ _All of the mongrels are dead or dying, and the world burst in flames._ ” Gilgamesh reported.

For a long moment his vassal was quiet, and Gilgamesh took the time to look around. In an instant, the world collapsed. Even now, he could see the Root attempting to reclaim what was left of the world.

“ _Where can we go?_ ” They spoke up.

Gilgamesh strode forward, examining a crack in space that seemed to lead to a grassy hill. “ _Hold on, I, the king, have an idea._ ”

Stepping through the crack, he appeared several feet above the ground in a peaceful place. Why was he trying so hard for his amusement? Was it really that important? Regrettably, Gilgamesh thought his answer was “Yes.”

That didn't stop him from ejecting his vassal from the Gate of Babylon several feet in the air though. They fell from higher than this before, they would be fine..

Tossing his head back, he laughed as they cursed at him as they fell. Even after a few years, they were still finding ways to amuse him.


	4. Clothes (Cen and Lucian)

Cen and Lucian peered at Archer as he got into another one of his moods. This time it seemed to be related to clothing. He unceremoniously dumped a pile of clothing in their lap and they stared at the pile, then at Archer.

“Archer… have you gone mad?”

Archer scoffed. “Of course not! But as my vassal, you must discard those rags you wear as everyday clothing!”

They blinked once. “But Archer, don't you remember our magecraft rips holes in clothing? They’d get ruined.”

“FOOL!” Archer roared. “Did you think I, the king, didn't take that into account?!”

He holds up one of the shirts, a golden yellow one, and turns it around to show holes in the back with a shardlike design.

“These are meant to be worn under the dark overshirts while still allowing you to use your magecraft! Of course the overshirts have craftily made holes as well, not aligned with the ones on the undershirts so the color shines through! It should be trivial for you to maneuver your magecraft through the holes!”

They stared at the clothing, and rubbed the material between two fingers. It seemed soft enough.

They bundled up the clothes and brought them to the bathroom to try them on. Finding them to their satisfaction, they walked out with each set that Archer had procured, and the Servant nodded critically at each pair.

When the last of the clothes had been tried, they walked out with one of the black turtleneck sweaters with a crimson shirt underneath.

“We’re surprised Archer, we didn't expect this, nor for the clothes to suit us like they do.”

Archer huffed and crossed his arms. “Of course I, the king, would realize which clothing my vassals would prefer!”

Cen and Lucian shrugged, not quite sure what to say in response.

“...Thanks Archer.”

Archer nodded. “Of course, now even in appearance everyone looking upon you will know you are subjects of the king!”

Cen and Lucian tuned Archer out with the ease of long practice, thus implicitly granting the Heroic Spirit permission to use them as a clothing mannequin. When asked, they simply respond that Archer was good at picking out clothing that matched their tastes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why they act like they do is covered in a later drabble.


	5. Emotion (Gudao)

Not for the first time, Gudao wished he thought to bring some of the Servants with him as he scouted the area, but he wasn't that far away from camp, in fact, he could see the white of Kadoc’s hair from here. But he was far enough away that a wyvern could eat him before he could call for help, and one seemed to be ready to do just that, shrieking as it descended. He couldn't muster up the emotion to feel terrified, after what happened with Lev, a wyvern seemed less scary. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Kadoc's figure jump up, and run towards him alongside some of the Servants.

Gudao blinked as a figure dropped down onto the wyvern that had ambushed him. Maybe ambush was too strong of a word, because the figure was cursing up a storm as it fell square between the shoulder joints of the wyvern.

Without much warning, the figure pulled out a wicked sharp knife, and cut the base of the wings off the wyvern, before dealing a killing blow to the head. Was this another Servant?

The figure made a rude gesture at the sky, and… Was that person floating? An ally of this probable Servant?

“Archer you fucking asshole!”

The figure, male judging by the voice, called up. The golden figure, Archer descended, laughing heartily, and Gudao could guess that this Archer was male as well.

“My glorious vassal, I, the king, knew you would be fine!”

Gudao blinked. This Archer character was responsible for dropping this guy onto a wyvern? And yet they still seemed to be on okay terms with him? Even though the guy was cursing at Archer, Gudao had a feeling he didn't hate the other man. Just a gut instinct.

“It was still pretty rude!”

The guy that was dropped on the wyvern huffed, before turning to scrutinize his kill. “Hey, do you think wyverns are edible?”

Gudao winced at the memories of trying to eat one of the wyverns early on in the singularity, and decided to speak up. “You're not seriously thinking of eating it, are you?”

The guy turned around and shrugged, and now that Gudao got a good look, he looked pretty androgynous, with a pretty face, black hair, and heterochromia: left eye blood red, right eye pale gray.

“Why not? It's dead, and it's not that different from eating lizards is it? It’d be a waste otherwise…”

Gudao opened his mouth to respond but was cut off as Kadoc tackled the guy, before hugging him tightly.

“Lucian-!” Kadoc hiccuped softly, wiping his tears with one arm, using the other to hug the newly named Lucian tightly.

Gudao blinked. This was unusual for Kadoc. The other active Chaldean Master was quiet and usually kept to himself, preferring the company of his books over other people. But clearly, Kadoc was quite close with this Lucian. He couldn't remember a time when the white haired master showed so much emotion as he was now.

Lucian craned his neck around, trying to look at the man dangling off his neck. “Kadoc? That is you! It's good to see you again!”

Lucian squirmed in Kadoc’s hold, hugging the white haired man, who was now clinging to Lucian like a lifeline.

There was a coughing sound, and Gudao blinked as he saw Roman.

“So, Kadoc, care to introduce us to your friend?”

Kadoc blushed a bit, hiding his face in the collar of Lucian’s shirt, before Lucian spoke up.

“Hi. We aren’t complete ingrates. Lucian, no last name, nice to meet you. Uh, as for designation, Master we guess.” Lucian shrugged and stuck his tongue out at Roman, not really perturbed by the sudden appearance of the hologram. He called out to Archer.

“Archer! Come over and introduce yourself!”

The response was swift and immediate, as Lucian yelped as what looked like a softball was thrown at him by Archer.

“Fool! Why should I, the king, introduce myself to these mongrels?!”

With that, Archer dematerialized, and Lucian rolled his eyes in exasperation.

“That's Archer. He's an Archer class Servant, but that's probably obvious. He's also kinda rude- yeah you are, it's the truth!- but he is pretty strong. Don't get too upset if he calls you a mongrel, he does that to everyone. If we shared his True Name he would complain about it for months and we want to avoid that, so…”

Lucian shrugged, before turning around and examining the wyvern corpse again.

“...Are you sure this isn't edible?”

Gudao opened his mouth up to say something, but Arthur Pendragon spoke up first. “Technically yes. Tastes terrible though.”

The Servant was carefully scrutinizing Lucian as he said this, and the man sighed, shifting around until Kadoc was holding his arm tightly. Gudao didn't even know Kadoc was that clingy, but it seemed Lucian didn't really care about that. They must be really close, and Gudao found himself wondering why Lucian didn't come to Chaldea with Kadoc in the first place.

“Well, we can all get to know each other over lunch.” Gudao pointed out, and Lucian nodded.

“Alright, lead the way!”


	6. Examination (Gudao)

During lunch, Kadoc refused to be separated from Lucian. He also found out that Kadoc and Lucian were roommates at the Clock Tower, and were pretty much each other's only friend. That explained why Kadoc refused to be parted from Lucian. When asked what he would do next, Lucian shrugged, and absently started to stroke Kadoc's hair.

“Stay with Kadoc, of course. We've been looking for him for two years, we aren't keen on being separated from him again.”

And didn't that have scary implications. It didn't seem like Kadoc would have left to join Chaldea without his friend, and it was mutual, so, what had happened?

“So, why did you leave in the first place, I mean, you guys seem pretty close.”

Lucian huffed, and fell back onto the grass and looked up at the sky.

“We got uh, shall we say, picked for a Grail War where we met Archer. We didn't want to get Kadoc involved in that.”

Gudao shrugged, and decided not to pursue that line of questioning. “Why do you use we as a pronoun? At first I thought you were referring to Archer and yourself, but now I'm not so sure.”

Lucian hummed and sat up. “Well, since you guys are allies now, I guess we can tell you. There’s two of us in here,” he tapped a finger to his head, “excluding Archer. We have our own likes and dislikes and hobbies, but we usually agree.”

Gudao raised an eyebrow, that seemed… far-fetched.

“That seems unbelievable. Do you have proof of that?”

“Yeah. But we don't really need to prove ourselves to you, especially since my other half isn’t keen on talking.”

Gudao blinked. So it seemed Kadoc’s friend was a bit delusional as well. Lucian… didn't really seem like the kind of person Kadoc would be friends with. But yet, they clearly were friends.

“So… now we are going to ask questions of our own. Where are we, and what are you guys doing here?”

Gudao carefully explained what had happened in Chaldea, and about the incineration of the human history. He then explained the singularities, and what they were doing. At the end of this, Lucian leaned back.

“Mmm, we don't care much about the fact humanity got wiped out, but we guess we will help anyway. But don't expect us to care.”

And wasn't that ominous...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These two-month old writings are wild...


	7. Tongue (Kadoc, Gabrielle)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gabrielle is the female protagonist from Fate Grand Order. She isn't a master in this fic.

Kadoc squeaked as his friend’s tongue licked his cheek. Oh no, he was bright red, he was sure of it…

“Mmm, tasty-  _ you mean disgusting _ .”

Lucian huffed as Cen interrupted them. Kadoc tried to think through the warm fuzzy feeling in his chest, but he found out he couldn't.

“A-Ah… What was…?” He trailed off awkwardly, not wanting to speak  too loudly.

“You had chocolate on your cheek!” Lucian chirped happily. Ah…

Kadoc nodded, and leaned in to curl against them, hiding his face in their sweater so passersby couldn't see his bright red face.

He knew Arthur sometimes disapproved of them heavily, mostly because of how they fought, but… but he couldn’t help how he felt…

He yelped as his friend leaned back on the couch, pulling him on top of them, and hugging him close. Kadoc felt his face was practically on fire- if someone walked in and saw them like this they'd probably get the wrong idea, just because he liked them as more than a friend didn't mean they liked him back in that way…

But… he didn't want to admit his own feelings because he was afraid… Afraid they would leave him… He'd much rather not confess than lose them altogether…

Humming, his friend's fingers went to stroke his hair, and against his will, Kadoc found himself relaxing against them.

“Mmm, you're so warm Kadoc… So warm…”

His friend let out a purring noise, burying their face into his shirt.

“Stay with us a while?” The words were half slurred with sleep.

Embarrassment forgotten, Kadoc smiled as he cuddled up even closer to them. “Of course…”

He really couldn't say no to them.

……

Gabrielle was walking down to the library, grumbling to herself. Couldn't someone else get the stupid book instead? Sighing as she pushed open the door, she tried her best to find what she was looking for.

After a few minutes she was ready to angrily stomp back when something caught her eye. She wandered closer to the table, and nodded. There it was! No wonder she couldn't find it, someone else had taken it out and didn't put it back. Nodding as she picked up the book, she turned to leave when she suddenly had to suppress a squeal.

In front of her was Kadoc, sprawled out on the couch, fast asleep. But that wasn't the only thing, underneath him was that weird kid that came back from the First Singularity. Luca or something? Lucian! That was it!

Oh, this was so cute, how they were curled up together in such a cute position, she couldn't wait to tell Marie!

Kadoc had his face practically in Lucian’s neck, and their legs were entwined together. Lucian’s arms were hugging Kadoc tightly to him as well! Ever since Gudao told her how physically affectionate the two were, Gabrielle privately thought they were dating, and this only confirmed her suspicions.

Who wouldn't when presented with this sight?

Gabrielle carefully put the book down, and walked away carefully until she left the library, on a mission to grab her camera. This was too good of an opportunity to pass up!

/////

Something weird was going on for the past few days. Kadoc noticed there were a lot more whispers whenever he walked by, accompanied by finger pointing as well. He thought the rumors about his appearance were gone, but apparently not… 

Kadoc sighed as he pushed open the door to the lounge, only to freeze as everyone immediately turned to look at him.

Before he knew it, Marie had squealed and dragged him over to the counter, sitting him down on the open chair there.

“Kadoc, I didn't know you had a boyfriend!” Marie smiled. Kadoc stared, processing what she had said.

“E-Eh?! That's not…”

Marie giggled, and slid over a photo, and Kadoc blushed as he saw what was on it. It was him and his friend sleeping together in the library… he just knew people would get the wrong idea…

“Um… we aren't like that…” Kadoc muttered as he pushed the picture away.

“But you were sleeping with him?” Marie asked quizzically. Kadoc bit his lip, if he mentioned that they did that all the time that would send the wrong message… But what could he say instead...?

“Them…” He corrected, before continuing, “Yes but… we aren't dating…” No matter how much he wished it.

Marie gave him a sympathetic look. “Its okay if you want to keep it secret, we won't tell anyone!”

Privately, Kadoc thought that was bullshit; as nice as Marie was, she was known to be a bit of a gossip.

“ _ Master? _ ” Arthur's mental voice probed at him. “ _ You're uncomfortable, do you need help? _ ”

“ _ Um yes, if you're available and close by, but please don't go out of your way for me! _ ”

“ _ I'm about to head down to the cafeteria for lunch, would you like to come? _ ”

Kadoc heaved a sigh of relief. “ _ Yes please, I don't understand women… _ ”

Arthur laughed in his head, and Kadoc thought it was a nice sound, bright and cheerful. “ _ Okay, I'll be waiting by the entrance. _ ”

Kadoc thanked the heroic spirit, and quietly waited for Marie to finish speaking. “I'm sorry Marie, I'm supposed to meet Arthur for lunch, I don't want to keep him waiting…”

Marie gasped and put her hands to her mouth. “Non! Keeping the King of Knights waiting would be incredibly rude!” She made a shooing motion with her hands. “Go! We can talk later!”

Kadoc nodded while thanking Marie for the chat, and privately reminding himself to avoid Salon de Marie for a few weeks, or at least until the gossip died down a bit…


	8. Casualty (Cen and Lucian)

Snip! Goes the magi’s head from his shoulders, and the Master of Lancer is no more. While Archer was playing with Lancer, we snuck in and snipped the Master’s head. Ahahaha~

He has such an ugly look on his face, fear always is. 

Just two more Masters or Servants to go, and then we can go home! It’s been two weeks already and I don’t know about Cen, but I'm  _ bored _ .

War is  _ such _ an ugly business, we would much rather be elsewhere, like with our friend! Having a friend is fun, even if he can’t really understand all the darkest parts of us! All these magi calling the Holy Grail War glorious are de-lu-sion-al~

War isn't pretty, it's ugly and disgusting and painful and gross. You can wrap it up in gilded gold and call it honor but underneath it's just- rott-en to the core~

Just like us, deep deep inside, after all! You can put fancy trappings on weapons but at the end of the day, they're meant to hurt, destroy, and kill~

Heehee, two weeks and this was the first Master we killed. Master of Rider was first to go, taken down by Assassin during the night. Next was Master of Caster, reduced to a bloody smear by his own Servant. After that was Master of Berserker, drained drier than the Sahara desert. And just now Master of Lancer was killed, his head parted from his shoulders by us. Only Master of Saber and Master of Assassin are left.

How could anyone think this war was glorious? All for this nebulous idea of Akasha?

How foolish. How useless.

Slurrrrp goes the blood from the late Master of Lancer into the glass bottles. Frère Assassin always told us to clean up after ourselves after all~

……

How depressing, that the Master of Lancer crossed paths with us. A rotund man, it's clear he thought nothing of the danger to himself. Only caring for so called glory. Only realizing his mistake a moment before death. I can hear Lucian laughing madly in the back of our head but I ignore it. He always gets this way after a kill.

Hopelessly giddy.

I murmur a quiet prayer for the deceased, an old habit picked up from the only brother that mattered. We don't care one way or the other if the Masters live or die. If it's kill or be killed, we will kill if we have to.

We don't want to die. We want to see our friend once more. We promised we would return to him. We haven’t lied before, and we don’t plan on starting now.

If it means killing and staining our soul black as pitch we’ll do it.

But do weapons have souls to begin with?

How droll. We clawed our way up from the depths of Hell once before by grasping brother’s hand, but brother isn’t here anymore. Now it's up to us and us alone to live and kill and claw our way to the top, just to survive.

A human wouldn’t understand. Not even the person we call “friend”.

Storing the blood into a glass vial, we drop down to the floor from the desk, and go looking for Archer. Without prana, Lancer should be fading soon. I wonder if Archer would approve or decry our actions. We do not care. Just an exercise in thought.

A human wouldn’t understand, but a Servant might after all.


	9. Games (Kadoc)

“ **Preposterous!** ” Archer roared loudly. The sound was followed by Lucian cackling even louder.

Kadoc looked up from his book to see what was going on: he could practically feel Archer’s anger even from his spot on the couch in an alcove behind the two.

...Why in the name of the gods were Archer and Lucian playing  _ Mario Party _ ?!

Kadoc scanned the results screen and winced. Even though he didn’t play that game himself, he knew enough about it to know what he was looking at. It seems that Archer lost by one coin. A harsh blow for anyone, but for someone like Archer…

Well. The less said about that the better.

“How in the name of the gods did you manage to beat me?! I  _ distinctly  _ remember your stars being stolen by the AI!”

Lucian cackled harder. “O-oh man, this is amazing-hah… We won by one coin… Oh man…”

Kadoc winced as he watched Archer chuck the controller at Lucian, who caught it effortlessly.

“This game is nonsense! I, the king, demand a rematch!”

“Why, so we can stomp you again?”

Kadoc watched as a vein bulged in Archer’s head. Oh no, this was not going to end well…

“ **Fool!** ” Archer roared with enough force to rattle the tables. Kadoc winced, and scootched himself deeper into the alcove where he was reading.

His ears were still ringing when Lucian breathlessly said something that made Archer roar in wordless fury. A portal opened behind him, and something flew out of it and collided with Lucian’s chest, knocking him off the floor. Kadoc peered at Lucian to make sure he was alright: he didn't think Archer would do something that would really hurt them, but sometimes a Servant misjudged their own strength.

…A pillow. It seemed Archer had tossed a pillow at mach speeds at Lucian in retaliation. Kadoc paused, and decided a tactical retreat was in order. Catching a pillow to the chest didn’t sound fun at all. Closing his book, he crept along the walls, praying he wouldn't get drawn into whatever was going to happen next.

Kadoc winced as he watched Lucian toss the pillow back at Archer. Archer paused, the pillow sliding down his head.

…Oh no.

Archer clicked his teeth. “…You dare?” He growled softly, before yelling much louder. “ **_You dare?!_ ** ”

Lucian stuck their tongue out in response. “Yep~”

Kadoc was almost at the door when over ten portals appeared behind Archer and he paled.

“Very well vassal, I will give you what you want!”

Archer launched the pillows.

Yelping, one of the pillow missiles slammed into the wall in front of him, narrowly missing his nose.

Finally in front of the door, he opened it to make his escape, but crashed head first into someone else.

“What…?”

Kadoc looked up to see Lord El-Melloi the Second. Then winced at the distinctly unimpressed look the Servant had.

“Oh um, why are you here?”

The Servant sighed and pulled out a cigarette before lighting it. “I heard the esteemed King of Heroes yelling, and that's never a good thing.”

The venom with which Lord El-Melloi the Second said “King of Heroes” was terrifying. Kadoc wisely chose not to comment on it.

Kadoc looked back at the game room, which was quickly becoming a war zone, covered in pillows everywhere.

“Why is he even here anyway? He keeps to himself, and everyone is happier for it…” Lord El-Melloi the Second grumbled.

“…He and Lucian were playing Mario Party. Archer lost by one coin.”

Lord El-Melloi the Second stared at Kadoc as he spoke, his jaw slack and his cigarette falling to the floor. After five seconds of stunned silence, he leaned down picked up the cigarette.

“…The King of Heroes… playing a party game?”

“ _ Mario Party _ .” Kadoc stressed.

This didn't seem to help. “ _ Why?! _ ”

Kadoc looked back, and awkwardly tugged the Servant out of the way as a pillow came flying through the door, before shutting it.

“Because Lucian asked. And uh, we really shouldn't be here right now unless you want to get involved?”

When the Servant remained frozen in place, Kadoc sighed and tugged the Servant by the sleeve down the hallway. He would need to find a quiet place to read, and it seemed that Lord El-Melloi the Second would need a quiet place as well to process what he just saw.

Hopefully no one else would walk in on the pillow fight, Kadoc could still hear Archer cursing up a storm even halfway down the hall…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Waver has stopped working. He needs a reboot.
> 
> Gilgamesh losing by one coin was inspired from TheRunawayGuys' let's play of Mario Party 5 on Toy Dream, where the same thing happened to Chuggaconroy.


	10. Depend (Gilgamesh)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Some torture happens in this chapter, if you think it is too graphic, let me know and I'll add it as an archive warning.
> 
> That being said, writing Gilgamesh still being his mostly arrogant self while being sort of accepting of his Master was an interesting challenge.

After a day or two of observing this world, he decided that all the humans were weak and soft. They weren't worthy of his presence. His new property was of course, a treasure amongst the refuse heap of humanity, and therefore should be referred as such. And as a treasure, it was only right that they belonged in his Treasury.

However… having a living, breathing treasure brought its own set of problems, problems he never had to deal with before.

Gilgamesh watched critically as his new treasure yawned loudly. It was the middle of a Grail War, they couldn't afford to let their guard down. He noticed they had not slept since they summoned him, and from what he could recall, that was not normal. It had been five days after all.

As their foot caught in a divot in the sidewalk and they tipped forward, Gilgamesh decided that enough was enough. His hand caught their wrist, and he steadied them. He glared at them, but his treasure didn't otherwise respond.

“ _ Sleep _ mongrel, or I, the king, will knock you out myself! It is unbecoming of a treasure of mine to be in anything less than perfect condition!”

His property looked blankly up at him. “…Can’t, can't yet… still danger…”

Let it not be said that Gilgamesh was a liar. He pulled out a powerful sleeping potion from his Treasury, and his new treasure didn't even react aside from their eyes fluttering shut, before snapping open again. That, if anything, confirmed to Gilgamesh that his new treasure needed sleep.

Gripping their jaw open, being careful not to damage his new treasure, he poured the contents of the potion down their throat. His new treasure wavered on their feet, before collapsing forward. Gilgamesh grabbed them before they could hit the ground: it was pointless to go through all this effort to keep his new treasure in peak condition if he let them bang against everything.

He paused, not quite sure what to do next. Now that his treasure was resting, what should he do? He couldn't scout and leave his new treasure unguarded. If he had to fight, then his new treasure would be vulnerable.

That left one option. When not in use, his treasures should belong in his Treasury.

Mind made up, Gilgamesh opened up the Gate of Babylon before stepping through, and closing the portal behind him. He dropped his treasure onto a soft mattress, before sitting down on a pillow himself.

Gilgamesh thought about this era, and the competition for the Holy Grail. As a treasure, it belonged to him, and therefore, these mongrels shouldn't be fighting over it at all. How foolish. His new treasure didn’t want the grail for themselves, but because they were blackmailed into participating they planned to give it to those that were blackmailing them.

Did that mongrel really mean that much to them that they would put their life on the line for something they didn’t even care about?

His musings were cut off by a soft whimper, followed by a cut off scream. He looked over to his treasure, and frowned. His new treasure was shaking, and rocking back and forth violently. Gilgamesh frowned. A nightmare? That would prevent his treasure from returning to perfect condition, and therefore, was not allowed. He would not permit it.

Gilgamesh laid a hand on his treasure’s shoulder, and watched as the shaking and whimpering stopped. After a few seconds, he pulled his hand away, satisfied that his treasure now would be sleeping soundly.

Except… they didn't.

The second he took his hand away, the shaking and whimpering began once more, and a mantra was falling from their lips. He leaned down close, and was able to hear what his treasure was saying.

“No… stop it… please stop… that hurts… stop it! Stopitstopitstopit!”

Gilgamesh frowned. He sat down next to his treasure, and as the mattress dipped, there was a pause in the chanting, before it started up again.

“No no no, don't-! Don't break our ribs, it hurts it hurts-! No-! That's our heart-!  **No Don’t** -!”

Gilgamesh paused, before deciding to lay down, then pick up his new treasure so they were laying on top of him. The screams abruptly cut off, and his treasure’s muscles relaxed, as their hands grabbed at his clothes.

…It seems that he would have to stay like this until his treasure awoke. That would be fine. A rest sounded like a good idea right now.

/////

Gilgamesh blinked open his eyes, and was immediately confused. He was in a room, dark as pitch except for a spotlight shining onto two tables next to him. The larger table was bare, and the smaller table had an array of implements on it. He paused, and tried to move, only to find out he couldn't.

“ **What kind of sorcery dares to restrain I, the king?!** ”

Gilgamesh roared, but winced as the sound echoed back.

Shortly after, a female mongrel came into the light, carrying a struggling smaller mongrel of indeterminate gender. The smaller mongrel was trying its best to escape, biting, kicking, and scratching the female mongrel. The female mongrel paused, then dropped the smaller mongrel down, before delivering a harsh kick to its side. The smaller mongrel let out a cry, before clutching its hand to the area.

“Stop it! I didn't give birth to you for you to show me such blatant disrespect! Now stop struggling or it will be even worse!”

Gilgamesh frowned. The smaller mongrel was the child of the female mongrel? Not even one of the phantasmal beasts he had encountered would kick around its own offspring like that.

Biting its lip and pausing, the child mongrel nodded. Satisfied, the female mongrel turned her back to the child mongrel.

Gilgamesh scoffed. In his opinion, the child mongrel gave in too easily-

He watched as the child mongrel suddenly stood on shaky legs, before running.

Unfortunately for it, the female mongrel caught up to it easily, and grabbed it by the collar.

“That's enough! It's bad enough you have to look like your father, but acting like him too?!”

The female mongrel slammed the child mongrel down onto the table, and Gilgamesh frowned as he heard a crack. The child mongrel was struggling hard but it was in vain as the female mongrel was stronger.

None of his people would  _ dare _ treat a child in such a cruel manner.

“Now, hold  _ still _ -!”

With the last word, the female mongrel grabbed an implement from the side table, and drove it into the chest of the child mongrel.

“Now then, let's see what your father saw in you to defy me…”

The scene suddenly faded to black.

/////

When Gilgamesh could see again, the same child mongrel was short a few limbs. He would have thought the child mongrel was dead, if not for the faint rise and fall of its chest. His fingers itched to eliminate the female mongrel from the world. In his kingdom, such… proclivities were abhorrent.

The female mongrel looked crazed as she started to draw a runic circle around the table. As the circle took shape, it was clear it was a summoning circle. Did the female mongrel intend to summon a Servant using a child mongrel as the catalyst?

Gilgamesh watched as the female mongrel started the summoning ritual, and watched with morbid curiosity as a Servant answered the call.

A male Servant stepped out of the summoning circle, his back to the child mongrel.

“Servant, Assassin. I have been summoned and come at your request.”

The female mongrel doubled over laughing. “See?! See?! They thought I couldn't do it! But that's right, I'll prove them all wrong! Now… absorb the soul behind you for prana, and we can be off-!”

The other Servant frowned as he listened to the female mongrel, before turning around and freezing as he saw the child mongrel.

“…I refuse. I refuse to absorb souls for prana, especially the soul of an innocent child!”

The laughter suddenly cut off, and the female mongrel looked up at the heroic spirit. “But I summoned you! I summoned you and therefore you should listen to me-!”

The Servant ignored the female mongrel, and stepped forward towards the child mongrel. “But you do not have the command seals.”

He brushed aside hair at the nape of the child mongrel’s neck, exposing the command seals.

Gilgamesh scoffed. With the sorry state that child mongrel was in, they would die soon. So why did the Servant bother?

The Servant picked up the child mongrel,and that angered the female mongrel. “No-! No-! That wretched child is stealing my Servant away too?!”

Looking into the child mongrel’s eyes, the Servant nodded. Some sort of mental communication must have taken place.

He picked up the scattered limbs of the child, before disappearing with the child in golden motes of light.

The female mongrel screamed as the scene faded.

/////

The next scene had the child mongrel and the Servant sitting in a small, but well kept room on a couch. The Servant’s coat was neatly folded and placed on the back of the couch. Gilgamesh blinked. Didn't the child mongrel lose its limbs before?

The Servant tilted his head. “What's your name?”

The child mongrel stared back, and made a low noise in its throat.

“Can you speak?”

The child mongrel paused, before repeating the Servant’s words and tilting its head. The words were slow, and not all the words sounded right. It was as if the mongrel had never spoke before.

Strange. The voice of the child mongrel sounded familiar, but Gilgamesh couldn't place it right now.

The Servant paused. “I see. So you can communicate with me mentally just fine, but verbally… I suppose our mental communication is not in any recognized language, yet it’s automatically interpreted into something we understand.”

There was silence, in which Gilgamesh assumed mental communication was happening. Then suddenly, the Servant stood up and started to pace back and forth angrily. The child mongrel shrunk back, trying to make itself smaller.

The Servant paused, before he visibly calmed down. “I'm sorry, I'm not angry at you, I'm angry at your mother.”

The child mongrel unfurled, and peered warily at the Servant.

“Since you don't understand English, or any language at all for that matter, we can communicate like this for now. I'll speak it aloud while communicating mentally so you can understand what I'm saying.”

The child mongrel nodded. Gilgamesh crossed his arms, he was quickly losing patience. What was the point of all this?

“You don't have a name? That's sad… Hmm…”

The Servant paced again, making sure his body language was calm. He suddenly stopped, and looked at the child mongrel.

“How about Lucian for a name? Do you like the sound of that? It means ‘light’.”

There was a pause, and the Servant smiled. “I'm glad you like it.” another pause. “My name is Charles-Henri Sanson, but you can just call me Sanson.”

Gilgamesh froze, then shook his head. There was no way this child mongrel was the same person as his treasure. They must just share the same name, that was it. His treasure looked nothing like that, they had black hair, and this child mongrel had white hair. There was no way that broken child mongrel could be the same as his treasure. There was just no way!

Gilgamesh was so lost in his thoughts he didn't realize as the scene faded.

/////

The next scene was of the child mongrel sitting in the Servant’s lap, a book open in front of them. Gilgamesh walked around, and paused as he looked at the book. It was one of those books for young children, where it had a picture, and then the name written next to it. Except this one seemed to be in both English and some other language Gilgamesh couldn't identify. He tuned out as he heard the Servant gently coaching the child mongrel on the words, and rolled his eyes. It seemed this Servant was more interested in playing house than participating in the Grail War. What an embarrassment.

Noticing it was quiet, Gilgamesh turned to look at the Master-Servant pair. The child mongrel was looking sheepish, and the Servant was looking shocked, before his face calmed as he noticed that the child mongrel was getting discouraged.

“I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were there, otherwise I would have given you a name as well.”

The child mongrel paused, before speaking in a voice different than before. “Cen.”

The Servant smiled. “Oh? You picked a name for yourself?” A nod. “I'm glad.”

Gilgamesh didn't hear the rest of the conversation, trying to process what he learned.

A child with two personalities.

One personality named Cen, the other Lucian.

Somehow managed to recover from losing all four limbs.

It was coming together to make a picture that Gilgamesh did not want to accept.

/////

Gilgamesh blinked open his eyes to be greeted with the sleeping face of his treasure. As he watched, his treasure yawned, before their eyes opened. A pause, and then his treasure jumped back as if burned.

“Sorry Archer… We didn't mean-”

They cut themselves off as Gilgamesh held up a hand. “I, the king, deem it acceptable.  _ However… _ in the future, do not stay awake that long again. It would be poor form if my treasure was in less than perfect condition because they didn't want to sleep.”

His treasure blinked. “…Treasure?”

“Yes, you fool. Treasure. I, the king, have decided that as you are better than the mongrels of this era, you are more suited to be a treasure in my Vault as opposed to one of the common rabble.”

His treasure paused, before blinking. Gilgamesh continued.

“However, I, the king, had an interesting dream while asleep.”

His treasure tilted their head.

“It was of a child tortured by its mother, before being rescued by a Servant the mother summoned.”

Pausing, his treasure looked away. “Ah… Yes. Us.”

His treasure turned around, and lifted the hair off their neck. Gilgamesh walked closer, and as he did, he could see three faded command seals. The same command seals on the child mongrel- no, the child in the dream.

There was a pause.

“Why did you not tell me?”

His treasure shrugged and turned around. “Why do you care? No one else did aside from Assassin. We don't understand why you think we’re a treasure- we’re just a broken weapon. A weapon broken and held together through willpower.”

Gilgamesh rolled his eyes. “Fool! If you are broken, then I, the king, will repair you! By my authority, I, the king, have decided you are a treasure worthy of being part of my Treasury! A treasure worth repairing and guarding! Therefore, I, the king, will do my best to repair you!”

There was a pause, before his treasure dipped their head.

“...Thanks Archer… We mean it. Aside from Assassin and one other, no one else cared whether we lived or died. Or if we were whole or broken.”

Archer stepped forward and put both hands on his treasure’s shoulders. “However, though I, the king, have many treasures in my vault, you are unique. As such, I, the king, cannot repair a treasure that is broken if I do not know how it broke.”

There was a pause, before his treasure looked up.

“...We don't sleep well, our dreams are filled with horrifying visions of the past.”

Gilgamesh wasn't sure if that was supposed to be a deterrent. “…I, the king, am aware.”

There was another pause, before his treasure shrugged hopelessly.

“…Just… Just thought we should let you know.”

Gilgamesh nodded.

There was yet another pause, and then, “Wait- how did we even fall asleep in the first place?!”

Gilgamesh huffed and crossed his arms. “Since you weren't sleeping on your own, I, the king, took matters into my own hands!”

“Wait, you  _ drugged us?! _ ”

Gilgamesh could feel a vein throbbing in his temple. “ **Fool!** How else was I, the king, supposed to make you sleep?! Knock you out with a blow to the head?!”

His treasure threw their hands up and made a noise of frustration. “By the gods Archer, we cannot believe you-!”

His treasure turned away, and stomped off. Gilgamesh huffed. Well, if they didn't realize they were in his Treasury, he wasn't going to tell them.   
_ Honestly _ . This is the thanks he gets…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ends the first batch of uploads, I still have about 40K~ words of drabbles left to upload. End me. Quickly. Without pain.


	11. Fever (Arthur)

“Good morning Master, it is time to wake up.”

Arthur greeted as he opened the blinds in his Master's room to let in light. The window behind it was enchanted to provide natural light during the day, and was dark at night.

His Master groaned and turned over, pillowing himself in the covers.

“Master, it's time to wake. You wanted me to wake you at 9 AM, were you up late reading again?”

Arthur didn't mind waking up his Master if needed, usually he himself rose at 7 AM, so it was no hardship.

There was no response from his Master, so Arthur walked to the bed and shook his Master gently.

“Master, why did you request to be woken at this hour if you cannot get up?”

His Master turned towards him, and Arthur frowned. There was a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead. Laying the back of his hand on his Master’s forehead, he was surprised at how hot he was.

A fever, a pretty bad one.

His Master gave a thin smile. “Yeah, I promised to help in the kitchen… Guess that's not happening huh… Looks like that fever that took me out a week ago right before the bombing decided to come back with a vengeance…”

Arthur frowned as his Master spoke, his voice was scratchy and sounded raw.

Walking back to the window to rearrange the blinds, Arthur adjusted them so they only let in the barest slivers of light. “I should think not, you have a pretty severe fever Master.”

His Master huffed. “Yeah… The cooks would shuffle me back to bed, I guess?”

“Indeed. I know you want to help the best you can with restoration efforts, which is admirable, but you should put your health first. I will be right back.”

Arthur left the bedroom to go to the attached bathroom, where he filled a plastic cup with water, before returning.

“Master, please sit up, I have water for your throat.”

The blankets shuffled as his Master moved, before reaching out to grab the cup from Arthur's hands. Instead, Arthur used one hand to steady the cup, before bringing it to his Master's chapped lips.

Gulping down the water, his Master drained the cup Arthur set it on the bedside table.

“...You didn't have to do that Arthur… you aren't my servant.”

Arthur quirked an eyebrow, before deciding to tease his Master. “Last I checked I was summoned as your Saber class Servant.”

Blinking in confusion, his Master put his face in his hands and groaned as Arthur’s words registered.

“That's not what I meant-! I meant you aren't my maid or butler-!”

Arthur chuckled. “I know, I was just teasing you.”

His Master lifted his head to stare at him incredulously. “...I’m not having some sort of weird fever dream, am I?”

A shake of the head answered him.

“No. Now, rest. I'll tell the chef you are unwell, and send in Dr. Roman to make sure it's just a fever and not something worse. Around lunch I'll bring you some chicken soup.”

Blinking twice, his Master muttered something under his breath. “...I didn't realize the King of Knights was such a mother hen…”

Arthur looked down at himself, half-expecting to have grown feathers. “Have I turned into a chicken? Is your fever worsening already?”

“N-nevermind, it's a figure of speech.”

Reminding himself to ask what that meant later, Arthur went to refill the cup of water for his Master. “Sleep now, I'll wake you for lunch, alright?”

Uncomfortable shuffling. A pause, and then, “You don't have to do all of that, I'll be okay…”

Arthur knelt down on the bed, and felt his Master's temperature again.

“I want to, it would be my pleasure. I was not able to stop my kingdom from falling to ruin, but I would like to make sure you do not befall the same fate.”

Blushing up to his ears, his Master pulled the covers up so only his pale hair was visible.

“D-Don't just say stuff like that-!”

“I promised to protect you when I was summoned, and if that means making sure you get better, then I will do so.”

A smile crept onto his face as his Master capitulated. A pair of eyes peeked out from under the blankets.

“...Well, if you're sure you want to… I just don't want you to feel obligated to do so, that's all…”

“I promise, I do want to do this, Master. Get well soon.”

On an impulse, Arthur ruffled his Master's pale hair chuckling at the confused look on his face, before he left the room, off to tell the chef about his Master's condition. 


	12. Reject (Kadoc)

Kadoc sighed as he looked at the entrance to the Medical Bay. He was surprised this hadn't happened before but… 

Someone like Adrian, who loved his mother dearly… wouldn't get along with his friend. At the moment, the medical assistant was yelling loudly at his friend. He moved to intervene, but his friend shook his head, and he stayed put.

“...How can you  _ not  _ love your mother?! She cared for you and raised you, even through you turned out like  _ that? _ ”

Lucian cocked their head. “Hmm… that is to say… we were incompatible. Just like we are incompatible with you.”

Adrian slammed his hand on the desk, and Kadoc flinched.

“Can a cold-hearted bastard like you be, in your own words,  _ compatible _ with anyone?!” Adrian practically spat out.

“Eh… Yes. We are compatible with Archer. Kadoc too.”

“Tch, I haven't seen this Archer character, is he an imaginary friend? Just like that other voice you claim to have?”

Oh dear…

Their gaze sharpened, and for the first time during this conflict, the smile dropped from their face. This was not going to be pleasant…

“Eh, Archer wouldn't waste his time with a mongrel like you. After all, you're less than the dirt beneath his boot, you know?”

When his friend got angry, truly angry, they got cold and sharp, each word carefully selected to hurt and cut. When they got angry, they meant everything they do  _ hurt _ , and felt no remorse for it.

His friend didn’t want him to intervene on their behalf, but… he couldn't just let this happen. It was wrong, especially if everyone in Chaldea was supposed to be allies.

_ “Allies, yet they cruelly made fun of you…”  _ A niggling voice in the back of his head reminded, but he shook it away. No, it wasn't the same. Those words were cruel, but usually not specifically targeting him. But his friend… his friend would pick at all of the weak points in a person, reduce them to a quivering wreck, and feel no remorse about it afterward.

Yes, in that way, his friend truly was incompatible with other humans...

He grabbed his friend’s sleeve, and leaned in. “We should go… he's not worth it…”

“Perhaps…” His friend turned on their heels, and walked out of the Medical Bay. He shot a glance at Adrian. Even if he was a bit of an asshole, he didn't deserve to be shorn apart from words. Though at least, it seemed it didn't affect him too much. At least not outwardly.

Hurrying to catch up with Lucian, his friend was leaning against the wall, eyes closed and breathing deeply. As Kadoc approached, Lucian spoke.

“Someone like that… hmm…” A pause. “We are incompatible with humans as a general rule… but someone like that, we have no hope of ever understanding each other. Not even a little.”

Kadoc tilted his head. “Then how are you compatible with me?”

“Mmm, you don't try to change us, even though we know you don't agree with us all the time, especially when we get angry and how we deal with it. You don't call us someone with an imaginary friend. You don't erase what we have gone through and invalidate it. Humans are selfish. Ourselves too. Humans don't want to admit that people are different. They fear things that are different. That was one of the first things we learned. Our experiences are different than those people, and they refuse to understand or accept it. However...” His friend sighed. “For us, someone who hates the person that gave birth to us with every fiber of our being, would not be compatible with someone that thinks that very same person can do no wrong.”

Kadoc was silent for most of his friend’s monologue, but the ending…

“Are you implying…?” He trailed off, trying to comprehend what his friend was hinting at. Dual colored eyes opened and stared into his own.

“Not implying. He is our half brother through our mother. We knew for a long time. Ever since we saw him. He feels similar to that person.”

Shocked, he sucked in a breath. “It doesn't bother you? That you hate each other?”

Lucian shook their head. “No. As you know, we think differently than others. It doesn't bother us. Just like he rejects us we reject him.” They gave a lazy smirk. “Well, we do not necessarily reject him, more like… he is beneath our notice. He just isn’t important to us.”

Kadoc let out a long breath, before throwing his arms around his friend. They flinched slightly, before relaxing. He buried his face in his friend’s neck.

“Even if the world rejects you, I promise I'll be by your side.” He murmured.

Tilting their head, they hummed quietly.

“Mmm, be careful, and do not give your loyalty blindly, to us or anyone else. We aren't nice. Don't follow us if it compromises your own morals. You are your own person, and no one is more important than that. Not us, not your parents, not the Servants. After all, you are the sum of your experiences, your hopes, your dreams, your likes, your dislikes. Do not change for others, if you want to change, do it for yourself and no one else.”

Kadoc huffed a laugh. “I never said that did I? I can accept you, even if I don't always agree with you. I can accept you without blindly following you. I can accept you without always understanding you.”

His friend hummed. “As long as you do not forget and lose yourself. If you lose yourself, then it can be hard to find yourself again.”

“Yeah. I'll remember that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OCs? More OCs. Going all in.


	13. Sensitive (Gabrielle)

Walking down the halls, Gabrielle suddenly stopped as she heard raised voices. She was going to meet Gudao for lunch, but he wouldn’t mind if she was a bit late. Those voices sounded pretty angry. Decision made, she entered the room where the voices were coming from, and frowned. Two of the other employees were hurling insults at someone else.

“How did a weakling like you even become a member of A-Team huh?!”

Their victim was a member of the A-Team? She had an inkling of who it was. Kadoc, or something like that? She remembered when it was announced he was joining the A-Team, a lot of people were pretty unhappy about that decision. She was a bit jealous herself. He wasn’t a genius like the other magi on that team, but closer in skill to herself and Gudao. Though, even if she was slightly jealous of him, bullying him wasn’t the right thing to do.

“Hey you two, knock it off!”

Both of the two employees turned towards her, and the taller one rolled his eyes.

“Honestly, if he’s not gonna defend himself, how did he even get onto the team in the first place?! He should just give up his spot to someone else!”

That was going too far. “It’s not his fault he’s on the A-Team, the Director is the one that’s in charge of team placements!”

Yes, she was a tad jealous that he was one of the 48 Masters and she was not, but, it wasn’t his fault. Sometimes, she saw him in one of the larger unused rooms hugging his knees, but she didn’t think he saw her in return. It was doubtful he would still use the same room if he did.

“Don’t you two have better things to do than pick on someone?”

The shorter one sighed. “Let’s go.”

Pushing past her, the two left. Sighing, she walked over to Kadoc and crouched down. “Hey, are you alright?”   
  
“Yes, thank you…”

Holding out a hand, Gabrielle grinned. “Do you wanna join Gudao and I for lunch? You look a bit lonely in here.”  _ You always look so lonely and sad, _ she thought, but didn’t say. 

Biting his lip, Kadoc looked down. “He wouldn’t mind?”

“Nah, he wouldn’t turn you away. So, what do you say?”

Grabbing her hand, Kadoc pulled himself up. “Yeah, alright. I’ll join you, thank you for having me…”

“C’mon, let’s go! I’ll race you to the cafeteria!”

“Hey wait-!”

Before he finished his sentence, Gabrielle was out the door. After a moment, she heard him follow close behind. Hopefully, even if just for a little while, the sadness that seemed to follow the pale Master like a cloak would be lifted.


	14. Achievment (Gilgamesh)

Gilgamesh squinted at his vassal. At the moment, they were laying upside-down, with their legs in the air and giggling happily. He exchanged a look with his vassal’s friend, who spoke first.

“...You… you see what I do, right?”

Gilgamesh nodded.

His vassal’s toes curled slightly, before they rolled onto their stomach. They smiled.

“See something interesting?” They waved cheerfully. His vassal’s friend nodded bluntly, before leaning towards Gilgamesh, the book in his hands forgotten.

“Have you seen that before-?” His vassal’s friend asked. Gilgamesh shook his head. “Do you think they know-?” He whispered.

Gilgamesh shrugged. “Not sure… But probably.”

His vassal tilted their head, dark hair following the movement. It came to a stop such that it was  shading their eyes. The wings held together with prana, the object of both his and his vassal’s friend’s interest, fluttered slightly. They were blood red, and were sharp, utilitarian. Yet they still had an appeal to them. Gilgamesh hadn’t seen them before, but he had no doubt they had some battle function. It was strange, it was unlike his vassal to casually display something when they could keep it close to their chest instead.

“Something interesting~?” His vassal smiled in a way that was utterly fake.

Gilgamesh exchanged a look with his vassal’s friend, and he could tell they came to the exact same conclusion: his vassal knew  _ exactly _ what they were doing. What they were doing though, was yet to be determined.

“Why do you have those out?” His vassal’s friend gestured to the wings. He got a wide grin in response.

“Because we wanna _ ~ _ !” Giggling, his vassal rolled over and clutched their sides.

...Archer believed that as much as he believed that the sun rose in the west, that is to say, not at all. Cackling, his vassal let the wings dissipate. Gilgamesh looked to the side, and his vassal’s friend was staring blankly.

“That’s a good look on both of you~!”

“Do you think they’re ill? Should we strongarm them to bed…?” His vassal’s friend muttered under his breath.

Before Gilgamesh even realized what he was doing, he was responding. “Might not be a bad idea…”

The only answer they got from the person that would soon find themself strongarmed to bed shortly was a cackle, before they hopped off the bed, and fled from the door.

Without hesitation, Gilgamesh and his vassal’s friend gave chase.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not shown: Lucian wrapped up tightly like a mummy in bed after Gilgamesh and Kadoc catch them.


	15. Realize (Arthur)

Arthur frowned as he thought about the one Kadoc called Lucian. He distinctly remembered during the France Singularity that they (he wasn't sure why that pronoun was used, but Kadoc was quite insistent on it) had cut down someone that they seemed to know without a second glance or any remorse afterward. It was almost as if they had a grudge against that Servant.

A normal person would at least hesitate before realizing that they needed to fight, but Lucian… they didn't hesitate at all.

He didn't understand them even a little. They seemed uninterested in forming friendships with other humans or Servants, but were cheerful when they crossed paths with others. They were human, yet were able to fight on par with a Servant, and were unafraid to do so. Sometimes they were cheerful and playful, but other times they were deathly serious. How confusing…

“What's on your mind Arthur? You seem troubled.” Kadoc looked up from the paperwork both of the Masters shared. That was another enigma, Lucian clearly had a Servant in the egotistical Archer, yet was uninterested in forming more contracts with Servants.

“Your friend. I don't understand them. They're a host of conflicting ideas and it's confusing.”

Kadoc pushed his papers to the side. “Yes, they've always been like that, even when we met.”

“As their friend, can you describe them for me?”

“...Mmm. Duality. Always two sides of the same coin. Not nice. You saw how quick they took down Sanson in France, right?” Arthur nodded. It was hard to forget how they had instantly lunged for the Servant’s neck as soon as they saw him. “And that was with a Servant they like.”

“Wait, they  _ like _ Sanson? I thought they had a grudge against him.” Arthur vividly remembered the ferocity with which they went after the executioner.

“Mmm. According to them, they like Sanson,but not that version of him? I don't know, it is a bit confusing and I don’t really get it… They think differently than most people, and sometimes it's hard to follow, but they don't lie. They dodge around the truth, and they're pretty uninterested in forming connections with others.”

Honestly, after that description, Arthur was even more confused. A memory of one of the battles in France came back to him, one where they fought so dirty it chafed at him.

“Don't they have honor?”

Kadoc shook his head. “No. They don’t. But they also don't pretend that they have any either. To them, living takes precedence over everything.”

“…I don't like them. How can we be sure they won't stab us in the back? Or that they aren't working with the person behind all of this?” Arthur commented.

“Yeah, I didn't think you would like them. They wouldn't bow down to anyone.”

“That doesn't reassure me.”

He got a shrug in response, before Kadoc turned back to his paperwork. “Then talk to them about it. There is no way I could explain their motivations better than they could.”

Arthur nodded, but privately thought he wouldn’t be doing that anytime soon. After all, they were on friendly terms with  _ Archer _ , who had an ego at least the size of a mountain.

Perhaps he would watch them discreetly from a distance, and see if they were a threat to the world.


	16. Connection (Gudao)

Gudao looked carefully at the new Servant,who introduced himself as Charles-Henri Sanson and who wished to be called by his last name only. This version was much different than the one in the France Singularity, and he seemed ashamed when Gabrielle mentioned it. Both Gudao and Marie had to assure him that they understood he didn't want to act like that, but he still seemed a bit unsure.

At the moment, Gudao was showing him around Chaldea, and he nodded calmly at everything Gudao said.

“…Hm, Master. The person that took the neck of the ‘me’ in France. Is that person here?”

“It's Gudao, remember?” Gudao said reflexively, before turning around, to look at him. “Eh? What do you mean?”

Sanson paused. “…The person that killed the ‘me’ in France.”

“Oh, so we can avoid him? Yeah, he’s here. I'll make sure we don't cross paths but, it shouldn't be hard.”

Surprisingly, the Servant shook his head. “On the contrary, I would like to see them.”

“Oh uh… Sure. Not sure where he is though…”

“I believe if the person is who I think they are, then they pronouns are appropriate.”

Reaching a hand up to scratch the back of his head, Gudao nodded. “Ah. I know Kadoc calls him- them with those pronouns but I didn't realize… as they didn't seem to care one way or the other… or at least never corrected me…”

Sanson tipped his head in acknowledgement.

“Uh, I'm not quite sure how to find them, I'm not exactly sure what they do in their free time… I guess aside from finding them directly, our best chance is Kadoc, if he's not near them already. Maybe Arthur…” Gudao trailed off, muttering.

Throughout this, Sanson remained calm.

/////

When Gudao asked Arthur if he knew where Lucian was, the King of Knights made a face, but told him that they should be sparring with Archer in one of the training rooms.

Honestly, Gudao wasn't sure what to make of it, especially since Archer was incredibly vain and still refused to share his True Name, but decided to make his way towards the training halls anyway.

Raising an eyebrow at the sounds of a fight, Gudao quickened his pace. He slid open the door and stared.

‘Spar' really wasn't an adequate word for what was happening. As Gudao watched, Lucian ducked under one of the various weapons Archer had fired, before closing the distance and kneeing the Servant in the chin with enough force to shatter a human's jaw.

However for a Servant, it merely worked as an effective stun, during which Lucian pulled out a scythe from what appeared to be thin air, before swiping at Archer’s chest. Archer managed to jump back in time for the weapon to only leave a line in his armor, instead of cleaving him in two. Arthur called this a spar?! What kind of spar was this?! This was more like a fight to the death!

Archer shot out a chain that tried its best to loop around Lucian, but they simply jumped over it, before bringing down the scythe on Archer’s neck, only for it to be blocked.

“Hmm, you're learning.” Lucian grinned.

Archer huffed. “Of course I, the king, would not let the same blow fell me more than once!”

Chuckling, Lucian kicked off Archer’s armor to avoid the chains creeping up behind them.

“Ah, good. That's good. This would be boring otherwise.”

Good grief! Archer and Lucian did this more than once? Though, Gudao noted that unlike during any fight Archer participated in during the singularity, the man was taking this spar seriously. Well, as seriously as he could without causing Lucian too much harm.

“Yes, I, the king, don't intend to lose today-!” Chains suddenly erupted from the ground, forcing Lucian to jump in the air lest they be ensnared. Gudao watched as Lucian fended off the chains for several seconds, before the chains managed to entangle them, and brought them close to Archer.

“Any last words before I, the king, make you yield?”

“....Yeah. Don't let your guard down!”

A puddle near Archer’s feet shot up, and Archer’s eyes widened as he tried to evade, but it was too late. The… whatever it was lodged in his chin, protruding awkwardly. He glared, but let them go.

“Nnn, honestly, if you didn't do that bit at the end and just forced us to yield instead of pandering to your ego, you would have won. That's still a problem for you.” Lucian commented.

Grabbing hold of the end of whatever was lodged in his chin, Archer pulled and Gudao was horrified to realize it was long and sharp and… what the hell?!

“Still as vicious as ever…” Archer commented, letting the shard fall to the ground where it… splashed? Lucian cackled, before catching sight of Gudao and tilting his head.

Sanson stepped out from the shadow of the door, and Lucian brightened up.

“Lucian. Do you…?” The assassin trailed off.

“Remember you? Yes!” Lucian bounded up to the Servant, and he patted Lucian on the head. Surprisingly, Lucian seemed to lean into the touch. If Gudao recalled correctly, they would only do that with someone they trusted.

“I want to hear about what happened after…” Sanson commented. Lucian nodded.

“Okay, but can it be over lunch? Sparring with Archer works up an appetite!”

Chuckling, Sanson nodded. “You call that a spar?”

“Well, yeah! We weren't trying to kill each other!”

Gudao shook his head in wonder, and watched as Archer came up behind them both, and said something quietly to Lucian. They nodded, and Archer disappeared into spirit form.

“Well, come on-! We have so much to tell you!” Lucian grabbed Sanson’s hand and started to lead the Servant away, nattering on all the while, leaving Gudao standing at the entrance to the training room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fight scenes? How to? I have no idea.  
> Also remember kids, don't let your ego get the better of you!


	17. Decisive (Cen and Lucian)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one actually directly follows after "Connection".

Cen and Lucian smiled as they sat across from Assassin in one of the Salon’s booths. Assassin smiled back at them, before leaning over to ruffle their hair again. Hmm, that was nice. It reminded them of back then.

“How do you call yourself these days? How old are you now? I want to know what I've missed. I didn't expect to see you again but I'm glad the Lord had other plans.”

Nodding, they leaned back and hopped up onto the back of the booth and put their feet on the edge of the seat. “We go by Lucian now! Cen is quieter, but always there. It's just easier for others to refer to us as just Lucian instead. It's been ten years or so since we last saw you!”

Assassin hummed. “No last name?” They shook their heads. “You may use mine if you wish. I would be glad to share a family name with you.”

All the air left their lungs. “Really? We haven't exactly been people you would have been proud of, after you left. We stole and picked fights and if we had to, killed. All in the name of survival.”

Assassin patted the seat next to him. They blinked, before edging around the table before sliding into the booth next to the Servant. A hesitant arm encircled their waist, and they sighed as Assassin tucked them close. Yes, just like back then, they felt safe.

“I expected something like that… Our time together was short, and I tried to teach you all I could. I do feel guilty for leaving you. However, it's not your fault that you turned out this way. You wanted desperately to survive and you grasped it with both hands. I may not be happy that you took the necks of several others, but it is who you are.”

They let out a shuddering breath. “We… we are glad. You're still very important to us, even after all this time. We were afraid you would hate what we had become…”

“No. As an executioner, I don’t have much of a right to blame you for taking the necks of others, especially if you only did it to survive. Also, it fills me with joy that I am still important to you.” Choosing his next words carefully, he used his other hand to massage their scalp. “Can you tell me about the Servant you were sparring with?”

Pausing, they turned their focus inward.  _ “Archer?” _

A grumble let them know he was listening.  _ “Can we tell Assassin, the one that we first contracted with, can we tell him your True Name? He can keep a secret.” _

There was a pause from Archer, before the equivalent of a mental sigh.  _ “Yes. He is important to you right? Very well. You have my permission.” _

_ “Thanks Archer!” _

Pulling their awareness back to the present, they saw Assassin looking at them fondly.

“Yes, we can!” They reached up to whisper in his ear. “Don't tell anyone else, but his True Name is Gilgamesh. He goes by Archer usually, he thinks most people aren't worthy of hearing his True Name if they can't figure it out themselves.”

Assassin frowned. “Will he not get angry with you if he learned you shared his name with me?”

Grinning, the squirmed until their head was in Assassin’s lap. “Nope! We are contracted with him! We asked him through our mental link if we could and he gave his permission.”

A hand smoothed the bangs away from their face. “I'll thank him for the honor later.”

“He'd like that! Use that exact phrasing too!”

Assassin chuckled softly. “Okay. Are there any other people you are fond of?”

“Yes! Kadoc Zemlupus. He is another Master here! We are very fond of him. He accepts us for who we are and we appreciate it greatly. He's a bit shy, but we don't mind!”

“Oh? Sounds like you guys are good friends. That’s good to hear. I haven't met him yet, only Gudao.”

“Yes, we weren’t fond of him at first, but he grew on us~! We met Kadoc three years after you left. We were roommates at the Clock Tower after the people there made us go. They were worried about us diluting magecraft you see. We met Archer two years ago, during a Grail War. He tried to kill us when we summoned him, but he wasn’t successful, obviously!” Assassin snorted at that. Considering they were still here, that much was obvious. “But when we came back from the Grail War, Kadoc was gone. For whatever reason Archer didn't go back to the Throne afterwards, so we looked for Kadoc for two years before landing in France and finding Chaldea! We're happy we found him.”

“I'm glad. Do you want to meet up every week or so? I enjoy spending time with you, but I wish to go meet the other Servants here.”

Standing up, Cen and Lucian nodded. “Okay! Should we meet here every week about this time?”

Dusting off his coat, Assassin stood up. “Yes. That sounds good. Of course we can spend time with each other more often than that, but setting aside some time just for each other sounds nice. I still wish to hear your entire story, I know that was an abridged version. A very abridged version.”

Chuckling, they didn’t refute that. It was definitely a very abridged version. “Okay! See you later!”


	18. Precedent (Gilgamesh, Marie)

Gilgamesh grumbled as he walked around Chaldea. He was still incredibly annoyed at the outcome of the Monopoly from several hours ago, his vassal targeting him deliberately during most of it. He couldn't even take out his anger on them because last time, someone thought they were trying to murder his vassal and called the peacekeeping force. Ha! Like he would destroy one of his treasures. Unthinkable!

At the moment, he was sitting in the Salon, staring at the snow. The couches here were acceptable. He glared at the owner of the Salon as she approached him, and she backed away.

His frown deepened as a group of human mongrels entered, chattering loudly enough Gilgamesh could hear them from his corner.

“Honestly-! I'm pretty sure that kid is delusional. A golden Archer? Chaldea doesn't have anyone like that here!”

“Yeah yeah, I've heard that he sometimes talk to himself asking if this Archer could play with him! Ha, as if a Servant would willingly play a game with a loser that talks to himself!”

His finger twitched. Were these mongrels talking about  _ his treasure _ ?!

“What was his name again? Luca or something?”

“Lucian. He also  _ claims _ to have a second voice in his head but if you ask me, he's just insane.”

Tch. Mongrels. The lot of them are all mongrels. Fine. He vanished into his spirit form and crept up behind the group as they made their way to one of the various booths in the Salon.

Once they sat down, one mongrel laughed at something one of his mongrel friends said.  

“I mean, who would like such a weirdo? His own mother wouldn't even like him, I bet!”

Indignant fury rose up in Archer at the remark. How dare they talk about his treasure like that! Gilgamesh suddenly materialized, shocking the mongrel closest to him.

“ _ Mongrel. _ Care to repeat yourself?” He crossed his arms and glared.

One of the mongrels gathered his bravado, and met his eyes. Unacceptable.

“I bet that weirdo Lucian’s own mother wouldn't even like him!”

Insolence! Archer slammed his hand onto the table, the loud crack silencing the rest of the Salon.

“Don't you  _ dare _ talk about one of my treasures like that.” Archer hissed.

The mongrel sniffed. “Who are you? Some worthless friend of that weirdo?”

“ **Fool** !” Gilgamesh roared, several portals to the Gate of Babylon rippling behind him, various weapons pointing out of them. “You cannot recognize I, the king?! Insolence! I am Gilgamesh, the one true king! Do not forget it  _ mongrel _ !”

At his declaration, the Salon broke out into countless whispers. Mongrels. All of them.

“If you  _ ever _ talk about one of  _ my treasures  _ like that again, I, the king, will make sure you regret it!”

His piece said, Gilgamesh turned on his heel and stormed off, the portals Gate of Babylon shattering behind him. He couldn't bear to be in the presence of these mongrels any longer.

……

The second the Servant, for it could only be a Servant to materialize like that, stormed off, the Salon was quiet for a long moment before the whispers rose in volume.

“ _ That's  _ Gilgamesh?!”

“He defended that Lucian guy too?!”

Beside her, Sanson heaved a sigh at the mess that Gilgamesh left behind, putting down the emergency contact intercom for the peacekeeping force. “Mon Dieu, Sanson, you don't seem surprised about this!”

Sanson shrugged. “I knew who he was. I also knew that for whatever reason he was keeping his True Name a secret, but I can't say I expected this… I expected Gilgamesh to take Adrian’s neck.”

Marie picked up one of the intercoms and called for Gudao. Her Master must hear about this immediately!

Five minutes later, Gudao came rushing into the Salon. Normally Marie would chastise him for running, but she was vibrating with energy.

“Marie, I got your call, what was so urgent?”

Marie clapped her hands together and gestured for him to sit. “Do you remember? The golden Servant that had been alongside us since France?”

“Yes… we have been through four singularities since then and we still are no closer to knowing his True Name…”

Pulling out a glass and filling it with water, Marie giggled. “Yes, he was here just now! Gave Adrian quite a fright with his anger! But…” here, she leaned in, her eyes bright with excitement. “Most importantly, he  _ willingly _ gave out his True Name!”

Gudao huffed, before taking a sip of his water. “C’mon Marie, don't leave me hanging like that! What's his name!”

“Gilgamesh!”

Gudao hacked on his water. “R-Really?!”

Marie nodded. “Yes, you were trying to summon him weren't you?! Yet he was here all along!”

Leaning back, Gudao groaned. “You say he was here, but all he did was frighten Adrian?”

“Yes! I could only hear Gilgamesh’s side because of how loud he was, but he was angry because Adrian said something about one of his treasures he didn't like?” Marie trailed off.

“Hmm, what's up?”

“Before Adrian sat down, he was saying unsavory things about Lucian, and I noticed that Gilgamesh had disappeared from where he was sitting before giving Adrian quite the fright, do you think they are connected?”

Running a hand through his hair, Gudao drained the rest of his glass. “I don't know… I guess I'll have to find Lucian and ask, but… ugh, I need to tell da Vinci so she can register him…”

Gudao leaned face down on the counter and groaned. Sanson, who had just returned from waiting on a table, patted him on the shoulder. 

“Isn't it interesting though Gudao? How Gilgamesh acted before today does not match up with my knowledge from the Throne, yet when he was threatening Adrian, he was acting closer to what the Throne has recorded? It's very curious!”

“...Please… I don't want to think about it…” 

Marie had stopped listening to him, instead thinking about how to get more information- ah yes, he's contracted to Lucian, if she recalled correctly! She would have to talk to them next time she saw them!


	19. Bother (Gudao)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mild threatening of the resident Memelin inside.

Gudao raised an eyebrow as Lucian sat down on the stool next to Kadoc. He was discussing strategies for the next and final singularity, and didn't expect the playful Master to pop by, he was planning to clue them in later.

“Hi Lucian, we weren't expecting you, but your input would be great!”

Lucian craned their head to look at him, and Gudao noticed both eyes were pale gray, and half-closed. Didn't Lucian usually have one red-?

“Lucian isn't here right now, may I take a message…?” A smooth tone interrupted Gudao’s musing.

What…?

“Uh, who are you? And what did you do to Lucian?”

Sanson came by and placed a glass of water in front of not-Lucian, who took a long sip.

“I am Cen. I didn't do anything to them, last I checked, Lucian was chasing after that annoying flower magus.”

Annoying flower magus…?

“Do you mean Merlin? What did he do?”

There was a long pause as… Cen swirled the ice in their glass.

“He separated us. Despite us telling him not to.”

“Uh, separate you? How…?”

Cen snorted. “Lucian and I, we are two halves of one soul residing in one body. That annoying flower magus did something so now we are two halves of one soul in two bodies. He said it would wear off but Lucian started chasing after him with the scythe.”

Gudao winced. That didn't sound pleasant.

“…Mmm, it is like if someone chopped off your arms and promised to reattach them later… You're still missing your arms...”

Ah… he didn't realize he said it out loud.

“You're not chasing after Merlin with Lucian?” Kadoc spoke suddenly.

Gudao watched as Cen took a moment to respond. Even after only a short exchange, he noticed they took a second or two to respond after someone finished talking. Not the weirdest quirk he had seen: especially when compared to Gilgamesh. It was also kinder on his ears.

“I have no desire to chase that annoying flower magus through the halls of Chaldea.” They declared as they finished their water, placing the empty glass down on the counter.

That was fair.

“So… while you're here, can you tell me about yourself?”

A shrug. “Sure. Lucian and I share most likes, except they like sweet things and I do not. They like singing and I do not. They speak with more enthusiasm than I. They have red eyes and I do not. They observe social niceties at all because it amuses them and I do not. I like bitter and sour things and they do not. I enjoy peace and quiet every now and then and they do not. I speak more calmly than them. I have gray eyes and they do not. I find social niceties irrelevant and they do not. We are more alike than different. Even though I tend not to speak, I am usually aware in the back of our shared body.”

Gudao raised an eyebrow. That was a pretty short list of how they differed. Though, that one about social niceties, if Lucian, who was cheerful most of the time but sometimes said things that would make most people do a double take was “observing social niceties” what did that mean for how Cen acted?

“Who came first? You or Lucian?” Gudao asked, and quietly prayed that this wasn’t a sensitive topic. While Lucian at least was less prone to anger when they first met, certain still made them incredibly angry. He assumed it was the same with Cen.

While Cen was thinking of a response, Kadoc leaned against them. Interesting. He knew that Kadoc was close with Lucian, but apparently that included Cen as well. That made sense, if they were two souls in one body. But Gudao wouldn't pry.

“We do not know. We do not care. Who we were before we split is irrelevant.” 

Gudao was admittedly, pretty curious. While he knew that Lucian had another personality in the back of their head, he didn't realize said personality was actually another side of their soul.

“What's it like? Being two souls in one body I mean.”

Can tilted their neck at an angle that probably was impossible for a normal human.

_ Wrong wrong wrong! _ Gudao forcibly ignored what his instincts were telling him. Yes, the way Cen’s tone didn't change from its even cadence, even when he could still feel the anger buried deep down when they spoke of their encounter with the Magus of Flowers, was creepy, but that was no reason to alienate the other.

“What is it like to have only one soul in one body and be contracted to a Servant? The fact we can communicate mentally at all times is a lot like a Servant bond, except nothing is hidden. They aren't that different, or so we have been told.”

Cen tilted their head further, before snapping it around so fast to look at the door to the Salon that Gudao winced. He frowned as he watched Merlin come running in, before brightening upon seeing Gudao.

“Gudao, quick! There's a lunatic chasing after me-!”

Merlin made his way towards them, before Cen stretched back and a blood red strand of magecraft stretched across the floor like a tripwire. When Merlin stepped on it, it snapped closed, ensnaring him.

“...I thought you weren't interested in ‘chasing that annoying flower magus throughout the halls of Chaldea?’” Gudao quoted.

The annoying flower magus in question spoke up. “Hey hey-! I thought you were the smart one-!”

Everyone present ignored him.

He received a nod. “I am not. However, if said annoying flower magus decided to come right to me, then I'm not going to let him escape. Why should I chase after prey that comes right to me?”

Gudao shivered at the words. He had heard similar things from Lucian, but something about Cen’s tone made it chilling.  _ Danger, danger!  _ His instincts were screaming at him to flee, and maybe, just maybe, he would be spared. Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Kadoc stiffen as well, before he dug his fingers into the counter.

Cen stood up, sighed, and toed the bundle of Merlin. “Now… what to do with you…? I could cut you open and leave you to bleed out, but that is more trouble than it's worth.”

Gudao felt ice slide down his spine at the casual way Cen talked about maiming the magus, before remembering that Lucian also made passive remarks like that, most of the time following through on them too, if it was an enemy. He also remembered distinctly that Cen didn't say that Lucian was violent and they were not. Yes, he recalled that once Lucian said they didn’t lie, but they definitely danced around the truth. It was creepy, especially the way their expression didn't change at all from the lazy indifference they wore ever since they first sat down. In his opinion, it was creepier than the worst of Lucian’s twisted smiles.

“Mmm, I could also string you up in the beach section until someone takes pity on you and cuts you down…”

Cen trailed off, no doubt thinking about various other fates they could think of for the magus.

His instincts were screaming at him to stay quiet and ignore what was going on, but he couldn't.

“…Go with the second one, I'll tell them to leave him up for a few hours. Don't let Lucian kill him either.” Gudao offered. The Magus of Flowers gave him a betrayed look. Cen nodded, before they started dragging the bundle of Merlin through the halls, uncaring of the complaints from their cargo.

Kadoc watched them round the corner, before turning back to Gudao.

“…So,” Kadoc began as he awkwardly scratched the back of his head, “You were talking about which servants would work best together during a deployment… right?”

“…Right… Let’s keep Merlin away from them for a while…”


	20. Defend (Arthur)

A sword clattered against the stone as it fell from Arthur's slackened grip. The King of Knights couldn't believe how far Sir Gawain had fallen- he would kill innocents for such a reason-? He would order for this...  this massacre to occur under the guise of a holy punishment-?

He couldn't move, his mind was screaming at him to stop Sir Gawain, but his body would not obey. He could feel a tear slide down his cheek, not even when he wanted to build an eternal utopia would he ever want this-! Not at this cost-!

“Arthur-! Arthur-!”

Someone was shaking him, but his body refused to move. Then the person tried to pull him away, but they weren't strong enough.

“da Vinci? Archer? I need your help-! It's Arthur-!”

Arthur watched as one of the knights- no, those couldn't be called knights, not when they would willingly massacre the innocent- lift his sword towards one of the refugees, having already slain the mother. He screamed at his body to move move  _ move _ -!

A shape landed viciously on the knight, before beheading it, and then bouncing off to the next one.

“Hey asshole-! Yeah-! You-! Sir Asshole!” A voice was screaming at Sir Gawain, but it sounded so far away…

“You would murder little kids?! That's fucked up-!”

“The holy draw is necessary to select only the worthy, someone like you couldn't understand!”

“Not even someone like us, who freely murders if necessary to survive, would murder a goddamn kid-! If this is what you find necessary, we don’t  _ want  _ to understand-!”

A thick whip of magecraft slammed into Sir Gawain, and Lucian followed up by collapsing the wall on top of him, but when Gawain emerged he looked unscathed.

“Tch.” Lucian hissed. “Guess we can only hold him off, not defeat him. Not too surprised, but hope springs eternal and all that rot…”

“Someone so impure like yourself...   **dare stands in the way** ?!”

Sir Gawain roared and started to press his assault, and even now, Arthur can see Lucian will be overwhelmed. But he can't… He can't…

There is a sudden boom, and a golden halberd is fired into Sir Gawain, but it is only a distraction.

“ _ Choke on your goddamn holy selection bullshit and die!” _ Lucian snarls, before the whip of magic returns. Instead of sending the knight flying into a wall, this time, it flings Sir Gawain far away. Panting from the amount of prana they must have put behind the blow, they paused, before turning away, and raisin their voice.

“Gudao we need to leave! We aren't sure how long it will take for that asshole to get back, we tried to send him as far away as we could-! We put as much prana as we could into that strike!”

Gudao yells an order for a retreat to cover the escape of the refugees.

Clicking his tongue, Lucian is suddenly in front of him, one hand on his shoulder.

“Ah man, this isn't easy for you, is it? C’mon-!”

Gilgamesh suddenly arrives in a flurry of golden light. He sighs, before grabbing him by the collar and slings him over his shoulder like a sack of rice. He tries to struggle, and now, finally, finally his body decides to move-! Why couldn't it have done so earlier-!

He can't hear anything anymore, the last thing he sees before his vision fades is Lucian picking up Excalibur.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A moment of silence for Arthur please.


	21. Confidence (Arthur)

Arthur comes to in a hut, and he sits up and looks around. Kadoc is curled up next to the bed, and Arthur feels guilty for allowing his Master to worry. There is a knock on the door, before Lucian peeks their head in.  
“Oh hey, you're awake. We're in one of the hidden towns in the mountains, and you've been out for two days.”  
Arthur makes to move, but Lucian tuts at him and makes him stay still as they skip to the bed.  
“While we were fighting, you got stabbed in the shoulder. We're surprised you didn't notice.”  
Laughing sardonically, Arthur ignores the pain. “I was… worse than useless out there, wasn't I?”  
“You were.” Lucian confirmed. “But seeing Sir Asshole, uh, Gawain, act so… un-knightly probably shocked you huh.”  
Snorting softly at their nickname for Sir Gawain, he closed his eyes.  
“For a while… my wish for the grail was to create a perfect utopia…” Arthur confessed. He wasn't even sure why he was confessing this to Lucian- he didn't even like them. However… if he was honest with himself, most of his dislike for the other Master was because of how dishonorable they acted, and that they made no motions to act honorable at all.  
No. That's not completely true, Lucian wasn't the one condoning the slaughter of innocents after all…   
After seeing Sir Gawain… he thought he preferred someone dishonorable that didn't even pretend to be honorable to someone that committed atrocities in the name of honor… As much as he hated to admit it… their nickname of ‘Sir Asshole’ was fitting.  
“It's just… all of that suffering, for what?”  
Lucian paused, before sitting on the edge of the bed. “...Some asinine ideal. Especially since that guy isn’t the only one of the Knights opposing us. On the way here, we encountered Lancelot as well. Supposedly.”  
An uncomfortable feeling was rolling in his gut. How could he… he didn't think he could see these twisted versions of his Knights…  
Noticing his discomfort, Lucian tilted their head. “What's on your mind? Do you want to talk about it?”  
Sitting up, Arthur thought about what to say. “It’s just… how can I face my Knights in combat?”  
“Mmm. But you keep calling them ‘your Knights’. Are they yours? They seem to be following someone called the Lion King. Even if they share the faces of your Knights, they're clearly different people, are they not?”  
It was strange sort of logic, but he could see the sense in it. Arthur looked down.   
“What if… What if I can't raise my blade to them in defense of the innocents-?”  
Lucian sighed before rocking back onto their heels. “Then we will slay them for you. But we don't think it will come to that. You're strong Arthur, you're just a little lost right now, that's what we think.”  
A strangled laugh escaped Arthur- that response was just… so expected of Lucian… yet unlike before when he would be horrified, all he felt was gratitude.  
“Thank you.”  
Humming slightly, Lucian tilted their head. “Don't thank us, thank Kadoc instead! He was the one that was watching over you! He cares for you.”  
Arthur smiled weakly, bringing a hand to Kadoc’s head. “Yes. I'll thank him too when he wakes.”  
Satisfied, Lucian hopped up and turned on their heels. “There is dinner in about an hour or two, if you're up for it!”  
Without another word, Lucian walked out of the door, before closing it. Arthur fell back onto the bed and laughed weakly.  
So the enemy this time was the Knights of the Round… or at least a twisted version… He would need some time to come to terms with that...


	22. Leash (Arthur)

It had been a long two days for Arthur, and he reached a decision. He knocked on the door to the room Kadoc and Lucian were sharing, and was called to come in.

Lucian was making the bed, apparently having just woken up. He wasn’t too surprised, even though it was past noon. They kept weird sleeping hours during deployments. They turned to look at him and waved.

“Oh, Kadoc isn't here right now, we think he was going to talk with Gudao and discuss which Servants we should summon here.”

Arthur shook his head. “No. I don't want to speak with Kadoc. I wish to speak with you instead.”

Pausing in the middle of arranging the covers, Lucian turned towards him. “Eh? What for?”

Arthur got down on one knee, and bowed low. “Please, teach me how I can abandon my chivalry and honor to fight.”

There was a long pause. “We refuse.”

Jerking his head up, Arthur opened his mouth to speak, but he stopped as Lucian raised one sleeved hand.

“Your honor is important to you right?” Arthur nodded. “What would you be if you abandoned it? Your ideal of chivalry and honor? We don't care for such things ourselves, but they're important to you, right? You shouldn't give up your morals for this, then you'll be even more lost and you won't be ‘King Arthur’ anymore, right?” Lucian’s voice was smooth and calming.

Arthur looked down in shame. As much as he hated to admit it, they had a point.

A hand lifted up Arthur's chin and he was shocked at how Lucian’s gaze seemed… softer than before.

“It's not worth it to abandon your morals, not for this. Because after the fight is won, could you even find yourself again? Maybe, maybe not. Besides, you shouldn't sink to their level.”

Arthur nodded, tears prickling his eyes. Then how… how was he supposed to fight against his Knights then-?

He gasped as Lucian pulled him to his chest in an awkward hug. “Oh man, we aren't good at comforting people…” They muttered, before taking a deep breath and continuing. “We won't teach you how to abandon your honor, but what we can do for you, is teach you how to fight against someone with no honor.” 

Later on, he couldn't place why he suddenly did what he did, but he tossed his arms around Lucian, and sobbed. Maybe he was under too much stress, seeing and hearing what his Knights had become. He did not know.

There was an awkward pause, but he couldn't bring himself to care. Then, Arthur felt a hand rubbing small circles into his back.

“Hey, it's gonna be okay now, alright? We’ll help you deal with this, Kadoc and Fujimaru will too.”

“ _ No!”  _ Arthur looked up at them, shaking his head. “I can't… I can’t let them see me like this!”

Lucian paused. “Okay. We won't pry but… you should consider opening up to someone else too. We aren't… We aren’t good at comforting people at all…”

Arthur hiccuped softly, clinging to Lucian like a lifeline for several more moments before letting go. He felt exposed, and it was unpleasant. He couldn't imagine doing this again with Kadoc or Gudao… it was bad enough that he wound up just falling apart on Lucian...

“...So… when can we start…?”

“Uh. Let us just get ready and let Gudao and the Old Man of the Mountain know. But…” Lucian brought a hand to their chin. “We won't hold back. In addition to fighting dirty, we can and will pick at your weaknesses with words. Are you okay with that?”

He nodded. Lucian stepped away and clapped their hands together. “Okay! We’ll just finish up here and then we will be right back!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Arthur. Under stress.


	23. Siege (Arthur)

Arthur grunted as Lucian’s scythe came swinging down, and backed away to avoid a knife hand to his solar plexus. It had been two days since they started sparring, and Arthur hadn't won once.

The first day, he froze when Lucian brought up how the Knights had fallen. Froze just like he did at the gates of the Holy City. No matter what he did, he couldn’t stop his muscles from locking up every time they brought it up. The second day, he managed not to freeze, but he could still feel his blows getting softer whenever it was mentioned. Lucian told him that it was normal, and that he was doing well to progress this far already, but Arthur wanted, no, needed to be better. He needed to be better so next time they engaged in battle with the Knights, he would be able to defend the innocents, and not stand idly by.

“What would you do next time, King of Knights? Would you allow the Knights of the Round trample all over the innocent people here?”

His hands twitched, before he grabbed onto his sword and slashed at the shaft of their weapon.

“No-!”

Arthur lost his balance as the shaft of the weapon dissolved. He wasn’t prepared for that, and had put his entire weight against forcing Lucian back.

In a blink, Lucian had slid around Arthur's sword, before he felt something kick him in the back, and he fell face down onto the rough stone, and then felt something prick into the back of his neck.

“…Yield…” He growled.

His opponent offered a hand to help him up. Arthur took it, and let the Master pull him up and then waited for their assessment on the brief match.

“You're getting better. It seems that verbal barbs affect you less now, and don't make you lose your composure. However, you're still not able to either predict underhanded tricks, or react fast enough.”

Yes, he noticed the same. “How can I make sure I don't lose to such underhanded tricks in the future?”

Lucian sighed, before leaning back and stretching. “Practice. Lots and lots of practice. We will throw everything we can at you until you can beat us consistently. We don't have the physical abilities of a Servant, the only way we can win is if we fight with tricks and sneakiness and the like.”

He sighed, and looked up. The sun was still high in the sky, there were still several more hours before he needed to go and help Cursed Arm cook. He was grateful he didn't have to hunt, and could help by cooking instead, as it meant he had the time to spar with Lucian and improve himself.

When Gudao asked him why he was sparring with Lucian, the answer was immediate. Lucian fought using every trick in the book, and he felt that it would help him better prepare to fight against their enemies in this singularity. He was improving, but would he be ready the next time one of the Knights engaged them in battle?

Arthur pulled himself back into a ready position. “Again.”

His sparring partner nodded, taking a ready stance of their own. Even if he was not ready to directly fight one of the Knights in combat, he would at least do all he could to make sure that he would at least not freeze up in horror. He owed it to those he could not save.


	24. Incapable (Kadoc)

Fear consumed Kadoc as the twisted Gilles de Rais summoned a monster after stating that he wanted to watch France burn for what it had done to Jeanne d’Arc. Not even listening to the woman he was embarking on this crusade for, Gilles de Rais was prepared to eliminate her to get to France.

He heard Lucian click their teeth from behind him. The faint clink of metal indicated that Archer was preparing his own weapons.

“What an unsightly thing. I, the king, demand it to be removed from my presence at once!” Archer roared, before launching a golden weapon. It sank into the flesh of the monster, before it was absorbed. It pulsed red, before Lucian swore.

“Fuck-! Scatter!”

Suddenly scooped off the ground, Kadoc reflexively grabbed onto Arthur's cloak.

“Wha-?!”

A loud  _ boom _ sounded in his ears, and he looked past Arthur. A crater had formed where they had been standing. The blood drained from his face. That would have killed them-! Looking around, he breathed a sigh of relief as he noticed that everyone had gotten away safely.

“Tch, you dare use my own treasury against me-!”

That monster reflected it-?!

“Fucking- Archer, don't you dare send more at it!” Lucian snapped.

As Arthur set him down on the ground he looked for Lucian. His eyes widened as he saw his friend was missing their left arm below their shoulder. Did they not get out of the way in time? Maybe not everyone got away safely, he just did a quick headcount before… 

Glaring at Lucian, Kadoc thought the Servant was going to ignore his friend and launch another volley out of spite. It wouldn't have been the first time.

“ _ Fine.  _ Any ideas?”

Kadoc breathed a sigh of relief that they would not have to suffer through a second round of dodging. One round was one too many.

“The spellbook, the monster came from there. When you see an opening, shoot it through Archer!”

Without another word Lucian launched themself at the caster, only to swear and change course as he summoned another monster.

Startling as a hand dropped on his shoulder, Kadoc looked up at Arthur. “As much as I hate to admit it, your friend is right. Waiting for orders, Master.”

Yes, that's right. He wasn't sure he could do anything to help, but he had to try anyway.

“Try and engage him in close combat, and don't use Excalibur. I don't want to find out if that tentacle monster can reflect energy attacks too… Not to mention it’s an enclosed space… Try and destroy it if you get the chance.”

Nodding to show he understood, Arthur joined the battle alongside Mash, Arash and Jeanne.

Focus… Focus… He needed to watch to see if Arthur needed a command spell.

An idea slithered into his mind. Would that work? Maybe. Splitting his attention carefully, his eyes watched Arthur as his mind began to weave a curse. Hopefully, it would be enough for them to gain the upper hand alongside Gudao’s tactics…


	25. Sustain (Cen and Lucian)

A normal magus could never fight a heroic spirit and win the fight. That's what they've been told over and over. They weren't completely wrong, but not completely right either. In a contest of physical strength, a human would get overwhelmed quickly, but there were ways around that. Temporary reinforcement. Being sneaky. Being cruel. Taking advantage of every single opening presented. All of the above. Those factors wouldn't guarantee victory, but they did even the odds a little or a lot depending on the heroic spirit.

Against someone like this corrupted bastard with a borrowed spellbook, they thought it should be enough. Especially when it was three against one engaging him in close combat.

Dodging another weird tentacled monster, Cen and Lucian bent backwards as the King of Knights tried to cleave the cursed book in two. Except the bastard saw it coming. Shame. The giant monster caster had summoned seemed to be charging energy- hopefully they could finish the Servant before they found out what it would do.

The uncharged shots were only marginally less destructive than one of Archer’s, they weren't eager to figure out what a charged shot would do to the terrain, it was already littered with craters as is. The archer class heroic spirits wouldn't have an issue, nor the demi-servant, but for those in close combat, well. They would have to watch their step.

The heroic spirit had many arrows buried into his flesh, courtesy of Fujimaru’s Archer. Thankfully, his shots were much less destructive than Archer’s.

Knife in their right hand, they lined up the shot, and there-! It sank into the caster’s chest, and they pushed their prana through the line extending from the hilt of the knife to their hand. There was less resistance than expected, perhaps because caster was feeding prana to the spellbook?

Whatever the case, it worked in their favor. They felt their prana sink its hooks into the Servant’s blood, and they  _ pulled _ .

Beads of blood ran down the knife before being absorbed into their hand. Summoning up the blueprint of their right hand, they worked on regenerating its form. Tch. Not enough. Breaking the connection, they pulled the knife back- the entire exchange only taking moments.

Slipping a hand into their pocket, they reached for two the vials of blood there, before popping them open. That should be enough.

Pity, they couldn't summon the scythe like this… not enough prana left after regenerating their arm. Knives it was.

Suddenly, the Servant stumbled. Taking advantage of the opening, they rushed in, ducking underneath a sword swing, before kicking the spellbook out of the Servant’s grip. Hm, Seems he didn't expect that, otherwise he probably would have held onto it tighter.

As the book reached the apex of its flight, a gilded sword slammed into it with enough force to pin it to the far wall.

“How dare y-! Urk-!” The caster began, before he was speared by Excalibur. Was it over?

Looking over at the monster, it seemed to be in its death throes. Hard to tell. Deciding to tune out whatever the caster was saying, they kept an eye on the tentacled monster. It seemed to have stopped charging, but the last thing they needed was to get sniped in the back because of their hubris.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FIGHT SCENES ARE A MYTH-


	26. Injury (Kadoc, Dr. Roman)

Somehow, they managed to win. The spellbook was immune to his curse, but the floor beneath the corrupted Gilles was not. He got the idea from watching the tentacled monster shoot destructive beams. Thankfully, the corrupted Gilles didn't move too much, preferring to summon more monsters from his spellbook to take the hits for him.

“Hey Archer, that was a pretty good shot!” Arash complimented.

Scoffing, the Servant turned around. “Of course, I, the king, wouldn't fail!”

…Archer’s ego was really something else.

“Hm, that seems to be it…” Gudao muttered.

Yes, Jeanne was talking to the corrupted Gilles. He seemed to have calmed down.

“…Jeanne. I'm the only one of us that should go to Hell.” 

With those parting words, the corrupted Gilles disappeared, leaving behind the grail. After a moment, the summoned monster disappeared as well.

The hologram with Dr. Roman’s face popped up. “The grail recovery is complete! The timeline restoration is about to begin! Lucian, was it? Do you have a way to get back? I'm unsure about your Rayshifting compatibility, if it's low, you could die.”

Tilting their head, Lucian deadpanned, “Yes, dying would be counterproductive.” They turned to Archer, who nodded. “We think that the way we got here will work fine for getting back.”

How did they get here anyway…?

A golden portal opened, and Lucian waved a hand. “See you on the other side!”

They stepped through, and with a ripple, the portal closed. 

“Alright. Say your goodbyes, and prepare for Rayshifting!”

……

Roman breathed a sigh of relief as the six of them came back safely. That Lucian, they said they had a way back but…

A golden portal opened up, and Lucian tumbled out of it in a heap of limbs. Wait, didn't they lose their arm in the final battle? He was counting a total of two arms here!

A click sounded from behind him, and Roman turned to see Lord El-Melloi the Second viciously clicking his lighter.

“I had hoped that Lucian’s… companion didn't come back too, but alas…”

Honestly, Roman could agree with that. The Servant they called Archer was prideful and arrogant, and a headache to deal with. Snatching up the tools to test for Rayshift compatibility, he walked down into the room. 

Cutting off their cursing, Lucian stared at the tools in his hand, eyeing them- no, they were eyeing him warily.

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see that Archer had fallen silent and was watching him closely too. Strange.

“I just need to perform some tests to check you for Rayshift compatibility, and give you a check up. Most people can't just regenerate an arm, you know?”

Kadoc whirled around, and stared. “Your arm, it's covered in scars…”

The left sleeve of their shirt was ripped off, and Roman could see scar tissue ringing around the arm just below the shoulder, and another pair just above and below the elbow joint. If he had to guess, there was another just below their wrist, hidden by a hand guard. They were too regular…

“Yes.” They muttered, shoving their exposed hand into their pocket.

Taking a breath, Roman steeled himself. It was a sensitive subject, but, he needed to know. “I know this may be a sensitive subject, but how did it regenerate? I need to make sure there aren't any lasting effects as the doctor here.”

Ouch, that was the wrong thing to say. They narrowed their eyes at him.

The response was clipped. “You think you know our body than us? How quaint. We’re fine, it's not the first time we had to regenerate an arm. Stay out of it _ doctor. _ ”

Reeling back, Roman watched as Arthur was watching with one hand on his sword, ready to intervene if they decided to turn on him instead.

Putting up a hand in a placating gesture, Roman hoped it would be enough.

“Okay okay, no doctor checkups for you. Got it.” That was fine, Roman wasn't sure he wanted to be alone in a room with them. Everyone wins, right? ”Though, I need to check you for Rayshift compatibility, it’ll only take a minute.”

Turning away, they huffed. “Fine.”

Good enough. Making no sudden movements, he held up the scanner. After a moment, it beeped, before a number popped up on the screen. It was over 100%, lower than Kadoc’s, but a bit higher than Gudao’s.

“Alright you're good for future deployments. Kadoc.” the pale haired Master jumped up, startled. “Why don't you show your friend around?”

Nodding once, Kadoc looped one arm with his friend's and led them out of the Deployment Room. It still baffled him how they were friends, but Kadoc must see something in them beside the defensive, bristly mess that was Lucian.

He hoped so, anyway…


	27. Headquarters (Kadoc)

Kadoc excitedly led his friend around Chaldea, pointing out areas of interest. They had just returned from the France Singularity, and Archer and Arthur had stayed behind in the Deployment Room with Gudao and Roman and da Vinci.

At first, he was worried that they were going to blow up at Doctor Roman, but thankfully they didn't. That was good, their temper, when triggered, was pretty nasty.

Even though they weren't about to unleash their temper, they were still irritated. He didn't mind though, his friend was finally here, after so long-!

Kadoc put in the pin code for his room and the door slid. “And this is my room!”

His friend tilted his head, surveying it calmly. “It’s… different. Different than the room at the Clock Tower.”

It seemed the time away from Roman cooled their temper, that was good.

“Yeah… it's a bit more spacious…”  _ And lonely. _

“Mmm, Fujimaru said we have to report to him later to get a room assignment, right?”

_ No, no no no-! He wouldn't, couldn't lose them again-! Not after he just found them again-! _

Biting his lip, Kadoc tried his best to gather his courage. “Um…”

His friend turned towards him, and tilted their head the other way and waited for him to continue. He dipped his head, unable to meet their eyes.

“I uh… would you like to… stay with me instead-? Like before-? I mean it's okay if you don't want to but-!” The words fell from his lips in a rush, and he was sure the tips of his ears were bright red.

There was a pause. “You don't want the room to yourself?”

Kadoc shook his head. “No-! I mean… It’s just… I mean… after 5 years… I'm used to… what we had…”

God, saying this was so embarrassing but he had to, otherwise he was afraid his friend would disappear and not come back again-! He missed the feeling of his friend curled up next to him sleeping, their steady heartbeat as they dozed off… he didn't realize just how much until they came back.

“…Okay. If you're sure. But if it stops working for you, don't be afraid to let us know so we can leave. We don't want to make you uncomfortable.”

He was so happy he could burst-! Laughing, he hugged his friend close, burrowing his nose into their neck. He missed them so much and was afraid that if he ever saw them again they'd have forgotten him and moved on but they didn't! They remembered him and wanted to still be his friend! That made him so happy!

“I just… I want you to stay… because… because you're important to me…”

A hand came to rest in his hair. “Okay. You're important to us too.”

With a wide grin on his face, he grabbed his friend’s wrist and led them to where Gudao was likely to be to get their arrangements sorted.


	28. Nonsense (Kadoc)

“Kadoc.”

Looking up from his work, he turned to his friend. After they had come back from talking to Gudao, they had changed into a plain black turtleneck shirt with elongated and unpacked their handful of things. It seems that even after two years, they still didn't care for owning a lot of material things.

"Yes? What is it?”

There was a long pause, before they responded. “Why do you still care about us? We aren't nice. We've killed without remorse, and are nothing more than a weapon, even lower than the humans we dislike.”

Icy talons gripped his heart. His friend didn't even think they were worthy of being human. They thought of humans as scum, that he was aware of, but thinking of themselves as something lower? That he was not. How could he respond?

“You say you aren't nice, yet you cared for me back then when it didn't really give you a distinct advantage to do so. You helped me by telling me what I needed to hear when I needed it. You've done bad things, but that doesn't make you a bad person.”

Walking over, he pressed a finger lightly to their chest, over their heart. “You aren't just a weapon, no matter how much you claim otherwise. You're my dear friend too…” Exhaling a shaky breath, he closed his eyes, before opening them again. “But, where did this talk of being just a weapon come from?”

He couldn't remember his friend calling themselves a weapon back at the Clock Tower… Was it a new development? Or was it something they kept to themselves like the scars?

Closing their eyes, his friend sighed. “We've never seen ourselves as anything else.”

The words made his chest ache. How could his friend that was always supportive of him think of themselves that way…?

Smiling sadly, he added, “I don't think you're just a weapon… But… even if you insist on claiming to be just a weapon, weapons are only as good or bad as their wielders, right?”

They made a low noise in their throat. “Perhaps.”

By the tone of their voice, he could tell they didn't believe him. He wasn't surprised, but he was upset about that. If they truly never thought of themselves as anything but a weapon, that belief wouldn't disappear overnight.

Even if he disagreed, he knew that his friend was the kind of person that wouldn't change the way they thought about things for anyone. That kind of personality was, at times like now, a double-edged sword. The only thing he could do was to remind his friend whenever possible that they weren't just a weapon, that they had thoughts and feelings of their own.

He just wasn't sure if they thought that way because of a desire to distance themselves from humans, or because someone drilled it into their head to think that way. He wasn't stupid, screaming nightmares didn't mean that their childhood was happy, he didn't need to know the contents of those nightmares to know that. The fact they held almost everyone at arm’s length was yet another huge red flag.

Maybe it was a bit of both, something they honestly believed to make themself feel better about how they feel.

It was nonsense to him, that anyone could think like that. He would try his best to prove to his friend they deserved more than to be considered lesser.

After all, they did the same thing for him, he was just paying them back.


	29. Curiosity (Gudao)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gudao refers to Lucian with 'he' pronouns because Lucian never corrected him about it, not because he's being rude.
> 
> Edit: Wow I didn't realize I mixed them up. Fixed as at this point Gudao doesn't know that 'they' is what they usually use.

Gudao warily eyed his opponent, before he moved his knight to capture Lucian’s bishop. It had been less than a week, and he was admittedly, curious about the other Master. Knowing that Lucian liked to play games, he offered to teach him how to play chess. He declined, and told him he already knew how to play. Oh, that was interesting. Extending an offer to play, Lucian grinned, and decided to offer something to make it more fun.

For every piece that was captured, the capturer can ask the other one question that needed to be answered truthfully.

So far, he had asked several questions, having managed to capture several pieces. He found out that Lucian didn’t like doctors at all, liked puzzles, knew how to speak french, and knew an esoteric branch of magecraft, something involving the manipulation of blood.

“So, if you likened Kadoc, Archer, and yourself to chess pieces, which one would you associate with each piece?”

Humming, Lucian shifted on his perch. That was something else that was interesting, Lucian was balancing on the chair’s back two legs, and was moving the pieces using his magecraft. When asked, the other Master simply stated that it was an exercise in finesse. Gudao could see that, considering the chess pieces were pretty small.

“Kadoc would be the King. Archer would be the Queen. We would be a rook.”

Interesting.

“Care to elaborate on that?”

Giving him a toothy grin, Lucian captured his knight. “Nope, you’ve gotta capture another piece for that. Our turn. What do you do on your days off?”

“Usually work out in the gym, and sometimes go for walks.”

Surveying the board, Gudao considered his next option. Lucian had a very aggressive play style, but it was pretty effective.

After a couple of more moves, Gudao managed to make the next capture. “Right, care to elaborate on your chess piece metaphors?”

Chuckling, Lucian shifted so the chair was flat on the ground, and was sitting on the back of it with his feet on the table. “Sure. Kadoc is the person we care about the most, so he’s the king piece. Archer is the queen piece because he’s pretty versatile if he stops using the ‘shoot stuff at the problem until it goes away’ method, and we’re a rook because we work well with Archer, like how the rooks work well with the queen. We aren’t as powerful as Archer, but we’re not too shabby.”

They both fell silent as the game continued. That confirmed to Gudao that they really did care for Kadoc, even if he acted cold and defensive towards everyone else. His actions during the singularity strongly suggested it, but hearing the words ‘the person we care about the most’ definitely hammered that home. Gudao frowned as Lucian managed to capture his queen.

“Why don’t you dislike us like the others? We aren’t silly, we can tell most of the others here don’t like us.”

What a loaded question. “Well, you claim to be a bad person, but you care for Kadoc pretty deeply, that much is pretty obvious, both by your actions and what you just said about the chess pieces. Just, my instinct is telling me there’s more to you than a prickly person, that’s all. I mean, you’ve been helping out with repairs as well.”

Snagging a pawn, Gudao asked another question. “Where is your home?”

“Kadoc.”

Raising an eyebrow, Gudao paused, one hand on his bishop. “A place isn’t your home?”

Lucian shrugged, and leaned back. “Is that strange? We’ve never felt connected to a place. We still don’t.”

It was a little strange, but, if that’s what he thought, well, alright. Well, one thing that was for sure, he definitely cared for Kadoc. Yeah, he had a feeling his instincts were right on this one.

Capturing one of Lucian’s rooks, he fired off his next question. “Did you summon Archer with a catalyst?”

“No.” They moved their remaining rook. “By the way, that's checkmate.”

Damn, he was right. He got too caught up in asking questions then actually playing the game-!

Chuckling, Lucian hopped off the chair. “This was fun, we should do it again sometime~”

Collecting the pieces and putting them away, Gudao agreed. Next time, he wouldn't let his curiosity cloud his judgement of the game. At least he was able to dismiss da Vinci and Roman’s suspicions about the new arrival, gotta stay positive right? …Right?


	30. Integrate (Gabrielle)

“Hey-!”

The figure in the hallway stopped, before turning their head back to face her. “Yes? Did you want something mademoiselle?”

Sort of. She was iffy about the Master that came back from the France Singularity, but Gudao said he didn't think he was a bad person, despite appearances. She found that hard to believe, considering she had seen him lurking in the shadows most of the time. 

“Yeah, can you help out with rebuilding the cafeteria? We finished most non-critical repairs, so we are moving onto other repairs now.” 

Holding up a manila folder that was previously hidden from view, he grinned. “First, we have to to deliver these to that inventor.”

“Fine, but after that!”

“Very well. We should be there in about twenty minutes, assuming no delays.”

/////

Man, what a wreck. The cafeteria wasn't even close to the Generator Room, so how did it get so trashed?!

Several of the robots in storage were booted up, and they were helping with heavy lifting. There was debris that needed to be cleared and carefully looked at to see if there was anything salvageable, but most of the really large debris was cleared away, just leaving small piles. It seemed that it wasn't to bad, with almost all the remaining staff helping out.

Tripping over a piece of cracked tile, she yelped as the crate of new supplies she was carrying went up in the air. Oh no-! That had repair parts for the extra appliances in the kitchen-!

A crimson blur snatched the crate out of the air before it tipped over its contents. Gabrielle breathed a sigh of relief. She didn't want to get snapped at for her clumsiness. Turning to thank her savior, the words died on her lips as she realized it was the new kid. She didn't expect him to help her out, he didn't seem like the type.

With a tilt of his head and a grin on his face, he held the box out to her. “Do be careful, it would be unfortunate if these all spilled onto the floor, riiight~?”

Taking the box and shifting it under her arms, she nodded. “Thanks.”

Apparently losing interest, the new kid turned back and helped another employee shift a table into its new position.

Shaking her head, she huffed. What was he playing at? Whatever, she had to get these over to the kitchen, she could think about that later.

Careful not to trip again, she picked her way over to the doors separating the cafeteria and the kitchen. They opened, and Gudao grinned.

“Oh, you've got those spare parts! Thanks Gabby!”

“No problem!”

Helping her move the box to the island in the center of the kitchen, Gudao wiped the sweat off his brow. “Alright, with these, we should be able to finish repairs to the kitchen. I think the only room left is the cafeteria.”

“Actually monsieur, the cafeteria is finished as well. Or at least that's what they told us. The only thing left is to take out the trash~”

Jumping at the voice an inch from her ear, she glared at the new kid as he cackled.

“Do you get your jollies by just randomly creeping up on people-?!”

Putting putting one sleeved hand to his mouth to muffle his chuckle, he nodded. “A bit of harmless fun, don't you agree~?”

Eyebrow twitching, she aimed a kick at his shin, but he jumped back to avoid it. “I most certainly do _ not _ !”

He looked incredibly disappointed to hear that. She doubted it was genuine disappointment though. “What a shame…”

Ugh, he even sounded disappointed too!

“I don't know what crap you're trying to pull, but I don't buy it!”

Letting out a sigh, he turned on his heel, and put one hand on the side of the door before turning back to look at her and Gudao.

“We haven't been anything but ourselves, just because we don't fit neatly into your ideals doesn't mean we have ulterior motives!” 

With those parting words, he waved as he left.

Gabrielle growled, and crossed her arms, sticking her nose up in the air. “Gods, I don’t like him.”

What an annoying guy-!


	31. Effort (Kadoc)

Kadoc bit his lip, and looked down at his hands. He knew Arthur didn't approve of what he wanted to do, but this was important to him. He sighed, and laid back down on the bed, he had asked his friend if he could speak with them after they were done playing a game with Archer, but that could take a while.

Hearing the door open, he tried to gather his fleeing courage. After what had happened in the America Singularity, where they almost died because the twisted Cu Chulainn stabbed them in the back… He realized that if he never managed to tell them how he felt, he would keep thinking about what could have been.

Especially because the only reason they managed to survive was because they twisted aside at the last moment, so instead of stabbing them in the heart, the cursed spear sliced through a lung instead. The only reason they survived afterwards was because Archer fought with increased ferocity to end the fight as soon as possible, as well as Nightingale’s treatment. He had tried to destroy the curse, but, he couldn't do anything because it was a curse powered by a grail… It was futile, in the end.

Lucian hummed, and skipped over. “Hi Kadoc, what did you wanna talk about?”

Kadoc lightly grasped his friend’s wrist, before tugging them close. They tilted their head.

“Is there something wrong?”

Kadoc shook his head, and hid his face in their neck. “I just… after the last singularity… I want to hold you close, that's all…”

Lucian made a low noise in their throat, and awkwardly moved to hug him.

They stayed like that for several minutes, and Kadoc was content to just spend time with them like this. It was pleasant, just spending a quiet moment with the person he loved dearly.

“I love you…” The words slipped from his lips unconsciously, and he felt his friend stiffen.

Panic took hold, oh no, what if Lucian didn't want to be friends with him anymore-?!

“We don't… we don't know how… to love, we mean. We never learned, never were taught how… People talk about it all the time but they never specify what it means.”

Kadoc looked up, and he worried his lower lip with his teeth. Lucian was looking away, clearly unsure.

Oh.  _ Oh. _

Anxiety evaporating, he curled his fingers into their shirt.

Sometimes, Kadoc forgot. Forgot that his friend didn't have the same upbringing as most people. Most people would be able to identify what love was without putting words to it, but...

Kadoc hugged Lucian close. “That's okay. Do you want to try? To love me I mean?”

Lucian dropped a hand to his palm. “...Yes, we want to try. But we aren't sure how good we will be at it…”

Kadoc leaned in and nuzzled Lucian, before pulling away to look calmly into their face. “I'll try my best as well, you deserve nothing less than that.”

Dipping their head, they didn’t respond further. He smiled as he saw the pink at the tips of their ears. Ah, they were so cute like this…

Leaning in once more, Kadoc pressed a kiss to the tip of their nose, before sliding his hands under Lucian’s sleeves and tangling his fingers with theirs.

He loved them so much, he was glad, so glad that they were willing to give a relationship a try.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What am I even doing anymore? A mystery.


	32. Rebellion (Cen and Lucian)

Cen and Lucian paused as someone tapped their shoulder. They craned their head back and were greeted by an angry King of Knights. Around them, he always seemed angry, and they could not place what they did that made him dislike them so.

“Yes?”

“A word in private, if you please?”

Archer glared at the King of Knights, and they mentally told him they would call if they needed him.

“Yeah, sure.” They stood up from the couch and stretched. Following the King of Knights outside of the room and around the corner, they didn't bat an eye when he suddenly slammed a hand next to them on the wall.

“Eh, what did we do to offend you now, O’ King of Knights?” A tilt of the head.

“Don't play me for the fool-! What were you doing to him-!”

Oh, was he really bothered by that, of all things? They were expecting another rant about how they had cheated in some sort of way again…

“You mean kissing him? The esteemed King of Knights doesn't know what that is?”

The King of Knights made an inarticulate sound of rage. “Of course  _ I  _ know what it is, but why would  _ you  _ know what it is?”

Raising an eyebrow, the response was swift. “He told us. There are plenty of people kissing in the halls here. Take your pick.”

“I don't understand what he sees in you-!”

Tilting their head to the other side, Cen was the one to speak first. “...Could it be, that you're jealous?” Lucian chimed in. “Ooh, maybe! Do you have romantic feelings for him, O King of Knights~?”

Pendragon sputtered, before shaking his head. “Don't change the subject-! I just want what's best for him, something you seem to care little for-!”

A frown marred their features, and their eyes turned cold. Next time they spoke, they spoke in unison. “Listen, King of Knights. Just because you don't like us doesn't mean we mean harm to come to Kadoc. We care for him, and you must as well if you're coming here to tell at us out of some misguided attempt to chase us away. Why is it so hard for you to accept that Kadoc is fully able to make his own decisions?”

Not waiting for an answer, they ducked under the King of Knights’ arm, before sliding their hands into their pockets, and stalked back to where Archer was waiting.

Archer raised an eyebrow in response, a silent demand to know what happened.

“Nothing important, a lost man just required our attention.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Arthur means well and is trying his best.


	33. Conflict (Marie)

“This is  _ exactly _ why I didn't tell you!”

Marie paused as she heard someone shouting. Odd, this corridor was usually pretty deserted, but then again, it was the perfect place to have an argument for this reason.

She didn't recognize the voice, so she crept towards the source of the sound and peered around the corner.

What…? Kadoc was having a shouting match with Arthur? Neither of the two people involved tended to shout at others, and they were friends, so why were they fighting all of a sudden?!

“Look Kadoc, I think you should reconsider dating them- who knows what they could be doing to you?!”

“I  _ love _ them Arthur! I'm not asking for you to love them too! You don't like them, I get that-! But why can't you let me make my own decisions?!”

“Because I think you're making a mistake!”

Kadoc ran a hand through his hair in frustration. “I've known them for longer than I've know you! So why can't you trust my judgment on this?! As far as I'm aware, they didn't do anything to you personally for you to hate them so much!”

Arthur crossed his arms and turned away. “Their very lack of honor is an insult!”

Oh, Marie had a good idea of who they were arguing about. But when did Kadoc and Lucian start dating? Last time she brought it up, many months ago, he claimed they weren't dating. Yet… if Arthur was acting like this, she could understand why Kadoc would want to keep it a secret.

“That's just how they are, just like how you are the King of Knights Arthur!”

Arthur made a wordless sound of rage, before turning on his heel and storming away from where Marie was hiding. Once the footsteps faded, Kadoc ran a hand through his bangs again and slid down to the floor, and brought his knees up to his chest, his shoulders shaking.

Marie rapidly backed up the way she came. It would be incredibly rude to intrude on such a private moment. She privately resolved to keep what she had learned a secret.

She knew she was an incorrigible gossip at times but… this, this was too much for her, and it felt wrong for her to spread this. Especially since both Kadoc and Lucian were very private people.

Though soon enough the news that Arthur and his Master had a severe fight would doubtlessly spread, she could do her best in order to prevent the reason from spreading as well.


	34. Flow (Arthur)

Arthur was nervous. After the Chaldean team had returned from the Camelot Singularity, he realized he never apologized to Lucian for all of the pretty nasty things he said to them, especially when he learned that they were dating Kadoc. He apologized to his Master, but he couldn't recall ever apologizing to Lucian.

And yet… even though he never did apologize, Lucian was still willing to help him with his troubles during the most recent singularity as best they could. He couldn't take back the hurtful things, but he could at least apologize and do better by them.

He asked Gilgamesh where they were, and the King of Heroes glared at him. Arthur couldn't fault him for that, since he made no secret of how little he liked Lucian before Camelot. However, despite his own misgivings, Gilgamesh told him to check the game room. He politely thanked the other Servant and left.

Now, he was standing in front of the closed door to the game room, a voice, he assumed Lucian’s, was singing some song he couldn't recognize.

He quietly opened the door as to not disturb them, but they caught his eye and held up a hand to wait. It was quite impressive, considering they were dancing to the fast pace of the song.

Arthur made his way to the couch in the back of the room, waiting patiently for Lucian to finish. Once they did, they turned towards him and tilted their head, putting one hand under their chin.

“So, what's up?”

Taking in a deep breath, Arthur spoke. “I want to apologize. I know I haven't been kind to you, especially for the past few months. It was wrong of me. I realized that though you too were antagonistic to me, it was always in response to my own antagonism. You never started a fight with me first, only responded to my own hostility with hostility of your own. For that, I'm sorry, especially since I had been rude to you for reasons unbecoming of a knight ever since we met. It took me a shamefully long time to realize that just because your morals are not the same as mine, that doesn't mean you are evil. I am ashamed to admit that I only realized that after Camelot, when the Knights were committing atrocities in the name of honor.”

Lucian listened attentively to the apology, then hummed. “It’s okay, we accept your apology. We are used to people not getting along with us. But-!”

Lucian spun on their heels. “But now we can move past that and be friends now, right~?”

Surprised, Arthur choked out a laugh. “Yeah, we can be now.”

Lucian clapped their hands and grabbed Arthur by the wrists and pulled him up. “Sing with us! Archer and Kadoc never want to! It's a lot of fun!”

Deciding to go along with it, Arthur laughed. “I'll try it, but I can't promise I'll be any good at it.”

Giggling, Lucian scrolled through something on the screen. “That's okay, as long as you have fun! Do you know any of these songs Saber?”

Arthur snorted at the form of address. He was sure at this point that Lucian was allergic to using someone's first name. As far as he was aware, the only person they called by first name on a regular basis was Kadoc.

Looking at the list, Arthur shook his head. “Aww, that's a shame. Hard to sing along if you don't know the words…”

A smile playing on his lips, Arthur admitted that Lucian was nothing like the evil demon his mind made them out to be. Even from such a short conversation where he wasn't being openly antagonistic towards them and when the world wasn't in immediate danger, he seemed fun-loving and playful.

It would only be several hours later that Arthur would learn that Lucian’s definition of “fun” included “smashing Gilgamesh at Monopoly so bad the other Servant was goaded into a play fight”.

Even so, as Arthur snorted and leaned away from the resulting squabble, he didn't regret finally shedding his preconceived notions about the other Master.  
 _...However_ , he mused quietly to himself as he dragged Kadoc down by the shoulder to avoid a pillow missile from the Gate of Babylon, _it will definitely take a lot of getting used to._ _But that's alright. I'm willing to try._


	35. Chemistry (Gilgamesh)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gil disapproves of Lucian's budding friendship with Arthur.

Gilgamesh glared as he remembered how well that cur and his vassal were getting along. Especially since he remembered that he was constantly getting into fights with his vassal before. Then suddenly that cur apologized and his vassal was okay with it?! That cur could be using his vassal and he wouldn't stand for one of his treasures to be abused by dirty hands-!

His vassal spun around on a chair with wheels and hummed happily.

Unable to remain silent, Gilgamesh spoke what was on his mind.

“Why do you suddenly get along with that cur?! After all, he disapproved with your relationship with your friend, did he not?”

His vassal paused in spinning around, and tilted their head back, looking at Gilgamesh from upside-down.

“Hey now Archer, we get along with you, don't we? And you tried your damndest to kill us when we first met too~!”

Gilgamesh huffed. “That was different!”

His vassal spun the chair around so they could look him in the eye without the blood rushing to their head. “How so? He apologized for it. We don't hold grudges unless it's that bitch. We don’t even hate that flower magus for what he did that one time.”

That was true. After they strung up the Magus of Flowers by his ankles, they often played pranks on unsuspecting people with him. However, the Magus of Flowers didn’t fight with them over and over for months on end.

“Because I, the king, declared you to be one of my treasures, and therefore worthy of my protection!”

Tilting their head, a frown tugged at their features before leaning forward and putting their chin on their folded hands. “We can associate with whoever we want Archer.”

“That cur could be simply acting by pretending to be your so called friend before he returns to how he used to be!”

His vassal raised an eyebrow, their frown smoothing into something more neutral. They leaned back until the chair creaked dangerously, before they hopped off the chair with a smile and used one hand to pat the side of his cheek. “Aww, we didn't know your cared about us that much Archer! But that's okay if you're bad at showing it, we are too~!”

He huffed, and turned away, crossing his arms.

“It's okay Archer, don't worry! You're still important to us!”

That was not the crux of the problem here!

Gilgamesh narrowed his eyes. He still remembered that insufferable goddess, how she acted nice when there was something she wanted from him, but when she couldn't get it she engineered a situation to kill his only friend. He absolutely refused to lose his vassal to something similar.

“Eh, is there something else that's making you so angry about this?”

Gilgamesh exhaled, slowly, trying to get his anger under control.

“You remember my legend?” His voice was level, not betraying the rage he felt.

“Yes, but, when you told us there was a lot of holes in it…”

“Very well. Listen closely, as I, the king, will not repeat myself.”

His vassal nodded, before plopping down on the floor with their legs crossed and their hands in front of them.

Satisfied he had their attention, he began to recount the situation that led to his only friend’s death.

“Once, the most annoying goddess in the world took interest in me. When I refused her hand, she set the Bull of Heaven on my kingdom in revenge. I and one other fought and defeated this creature, and the goddess raged. She demanded that her father put both me and the other that fought by my side to death. As the one who fought beside me was created by the will of the gods, they could not resist the mandate of the gods, and perished.”

His vassal was quiet for several moments, Gilgamesh could see them processing what he had just told them.

“...You believe Saber to be the same as this goddess?”

Yes, that was a reminder of why he found his vassal worthy of being one of his treasures. They were strong in mind as well as strong in body.

One of the rare few to have that honor.

“Correct.”

His vassal hummed. “We understand your concerns, but this is not your legend. We will be careful, and make sure Saber doesn't act untoward us like he did in the past. But there is no reason for us to hold a grudge, especially since most of the time, Saber was acting out of a desire to protect Kadoc. Sure, he was a bit misguided and bullheaded, but we don't think he's a bad person.”

That was as much of a concession as he would get, he supposed. The same qualities that made his vassal an attractive addition to his treasury also made them chafe at what they viewed as attempts to prevent them doing what they wanted.

They were incredibly free spirited, and he could respect that, even if at times it made protecting his treasure from harm difficult. The force of their rage would be even worse than that insufferable goddess if he attempted to keep them safe by placing them in his treasury for a long period of time.

However, that did not mean he would let his guard down around that cur. If that cur made even the slightest indication he was returning to his old ways, he would ensure that he no longer interacted with his vassal.

Betrayal was not something he nor his vassal would take lightly. It did not matter if they had different interpretations of the word: on this, his vassal and he were in agreement that it would not be tolerated.

If this cur betrayed the chance his vassal had bestowed upon him, he would strike him down without mercy.


	36. Preference (Arthur, Gudao)

Arthur laughed freely as he spun Lucian around, singing the lyrics to the upbeat song in tandem with his dance partner. He never could have dreamed he would enjoy singing these ‘pop songs’ so much! At first, he was skeptical about singing, especially the fast paced songs Lucian loved, but he was glad he decided to give it a try! The songs Lucian picked always had so much energy, and it was impossible to not give in and just dance along.

At first, he was hesitant about it, as he had no experience dancing to this kind of song, but then one time Lucian grabbed his hands and spun him around, and a laugh bubbled out from deep inside him. He understood why they loved singing (and dancing) so much, it was fun if he didn't have to worry about doing it ‘properly’ and just let his body move to the tempo of the song.

He let go of Lucian, and they started jumping up and down to the beat as the chorus came on. Another thing he was worried about was pronouncing the lyrics wrong since for some reason Lucian really liked songs with Japanese lyrics, but he caught on soon enough.

The door opened out of the corner of his eye, and he watched Kadoc creep in the room with a book under one arm. He tiptoed in as to not disturb them close to the end of the song. Once the song ended and he and Lucian struck a pose, Lucian turned the music off and turned to Kadoc.

“Heya~! Did someone need something~?”

Arthur chuckled as he caught the lyrical undertone to Lucian’s words, it was common if they spoke to someone in the middle of a session.

“No, just wanted to listen as I read.”

Lucian grinned, before clapping their hands. “You still don't wanna dance with us?”

Kadoc shook his head in the negative.

“Okay!”

There was a pause as Lucian decided to flip through the songs on the music player, before another familiar beat started up.

Soon, they were both singing again, and Arthur was twirling his shorter partner to the beat, both of them wearing matching grins.

……

Gudao was a man on a mission. He was looking for Arthur: they had just summoned a female King of Knights, and he promised her he would introduce her to the male King of Knights in Chaldea. He had passed Gilgamesh earlier and the King of Heroes suggested that he try the Game Room. Unusual, but he thanked the Servant and made his way there.

He raised an eyebrow as he neared the indicated room. There was some pop song playing, and he could hear laughter as well. He pushed open the door, and was met with an unusual sight. Lucian and Arthur were singing and dancing along to the song, and Kadoc was on the nearby couch reading a book.

He didn't know either Lucian or Arthur could sing, but they sounded pretty good at it. At least their singing didn't hurt his ears like Liz’s or Nero’s. Lucian caught sight of him, and the other Master waved, before letting Arthur spin them around with a wide grin on the King of Knights’ face. It was clear they were both having fun, and Gudao was glad.

Before the most recent singularity, Arthur was pretty antagonistic towards Lucian. Gudao was afraid that their newfound camaraderie wouldn't last once the singularity was dealt with, but he was pleased to see he was wrong.

As he watched, Arthur tried to spin around like Lucian did, but the King of Knights lost his balance and collapsed onto his dance partner and they both broke into a fit of giggles.

Gudao couldn't resist, he chuckled at the sight as well. After a moment, Kadoc joined in. His book was brought up to hide his mouth, but his eyes were bright with laughter. As the song ended, Kadoc grabbed the remote for the player off the side table and paused it. Lucian flashed him a thumbs up.

Several minutes passed as everyone got their giggles under control.

“Haa, wanna try that again?”

Arthur stood up and pulled Lucian up with him. “I'll try not to fall on you this time, you make twirling around like that look so easy!”

“It’s called practice!”

Gudao cleared his throat and both Masters and the Servant turned to him. “Am I interrupting anything?”

“Nah, did you need anything Fujimaru?”

Snorting at the form of address, he nodded. “Yeah, can I borrow your dance partner for a bit? We just summoned a female King of Knights and she wanted to meet him.”

Kadoc blinked in confusion. “A female Arthur…?”

“Her name is Arturia, but yes.”

Lucian clapped their hands together. “Ooh, sounds interesting. Can we come?”

Shrugging, Gudao nodded. “I don't see why not.”

Beaming, Lucian went to turn off the player and tidying up the room.

“I didn't know you liked singing Arthur.”

Looking sheepish and unable to meet his eyes, Arthur rubbed the back of his head. “It’s a new hobby. I didn't expect I would like it either, when I started, but it's pretty fun.”

“I could tell! You two were grinning the whole time! Actually, I almost didn't want to interrupt you two. You guys are much better than Liz and Nero.”

Chuckling softly, Arthur grinned. “Don't worry about it, Lucian and I can always come back and resume later.”

Gudao began to respond before Lucian clapped their hands together. “Okay, ready! Let's go meet the other King of Knights!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I tried and failed to convey the upbeat mood of the scene. :thinking:


	37. Entitled (Gilgamesh)

It was nighttime in the small camp the mongrel group had made. Honestly the fact none of them could see when their king is in front of them made them worthless. None of them had any idea who he was. Preposterous!

Except the pale haired mongrel his vassal called friend. Ever since that foolish phantom crossed their path, he was looking at him thoughtfully when he thought Gilgamesh was not looking. He, the King, would allow it.

He checked his vassal: they were sleeping soundly along with almost all the others, but the pale haired mongrel was nowhere to be seen.

“Excuse me, your Highness?”

Maybe he was. Gilgamesh turned towards the voice. The mongrel in question was awkwardly picking at a stray thread on his shirt.

“Yes?”

“May I ask you a question?”

“Very well. I, the king, permit it.”

The pale haired mongrel looked to make sure no one was listening. “Is your True Name, Gilgamesh of Uruk?”

Interesting. His respect for the speaker rose several notches. He was still not worthy of his treasury, but he was not a mongrel. He was unsure why his vassal showed an interest in this magus, but now he had an inkling why. His vassal had good taste.

“Correct. It is shameful that your… companions cannot recognize me. Offensive, even. It is lucky for them they are working to protect my kingdom, otherwise I would slay them for the insult.”

The magus winced. “Uh, thank you, your Highness. I love mythology, and I did a lot of research on Servants when I came here. You were the only one said to have an infinite supply of treasures…”

It was pleasing to hear one of the mongrels of this era at least called him by the proper title. After two years of his vassal calling him by his class name only, he was regrettably used to disrespect. However, even if this magus didn't use his favored title, he still showed some respect. Therefore, he deemed the magus acceptable, even if he did not recognize him on sight.

“I, the king, approve. If your fool companions cannot recognize their king on sight, do not tell them, they are unworthy of hearing it.”

The magus nodded frantically. “Goodnight your Highness, that was all.”

He nodded, and the magus scurried back to his vassal’s side. He had reservations about the one his vassal cared for, but thankfully, they had good taste in men.

He crossed his arms and stared at the moon. Tomorrow, they were to seek out someone to help the dragon slayer. He would much rather find the Dragon Witch once more. That woman dare harm his his kingdom, and for that, she will know the fury of the one True King.


	38. System (Cen and Lucian)

Cen and Lucian blinked as the Chaldea system whirred, before beeping several times. Nothing happened. Was that supposed to happen?

They did a little pirouette on the raised dais, waiting for further instructions. They weren't told why they supposed to be here, so they weren't sure what was supposed to happen.

“Ugh, that's weird. It's saying you have good compatibility with Servants, but the system refuses to give you the command seals and connect you to the system…”

They stopped mid-twirl and squinted at the doctor. “Hey hey, that's what this is supposed to do? Give us command seals?”

“Yes, but it's not working…!” The doctor replied frantically.

Tilting their head, Cen and Lucian hopped off the dais. “You shoulda said something- no wonder why nothing is happening. Call us if you need us for something else!”

The doctor stood up from where he was looking at the system. “Hey, don't go yet, you still need command seals!”

Sighing, they stopped, before detaching the hand guard on their right hand. They held up their arm and let the long sleeve fall to their elbow, exposing the ruby red command seals. They hoped the doctor wouldn't comment on the thin ring of scar tissue just below the wrist. With any luck, he would be distracted by the seals and not notice. He knew about the matching set on their other arm and that was enough.

“No need! We have some already!”

Pausing with one finger raised to type something on the keyboard. “How do you already have command seals, and where is your Servant?”

Eh? Was this guy really that dense? He seemed pretty unreliable, but this just confirmed it. 

“Mou, weren't you listening? We said we were a Master the day we met!”

“You said that ‘You guess’ after it!”

Eh, that's true. But while they were contracted to Archer, they never used the command seals or ordered him around at all. Were they really a Master then?

“Eh, but we never ordered Archer to do anything the entire time we had a contract with him?”

The doctor sighed, and sat down on the chair. “Ah. Master, in this context, is a term for someone contracted with a Heroic Spirit and using their prana to anchor the Heroic Spirit to the world.”

Cen and Lucian blinked. “Eh, we contracted with Archer and are connected with him, but we don't supply him prana, not anymore.”

“What? Then how does he stay manifested?”

That was a good question. Obviously Archer was getting prana from an outside source but where? What outside source would give him the prana to manifest even after a jump through time and space? Did it relate to what Archer asked for the Grail?

“Um, not sure… It started to happen after we won the Holy Grail War though… Hmm…”

Ignoring the doctor's exclamation of “Wait you won a Holy Grail War?!”, they put the arm guard back on and spun around.

“Well, if that's all you wanted us for, we are going to go back now. Bye Mr. Doctor!”

The automated doors opened, then shut after they had walked through. Humming, they put their hands behind their back, before deciding to go find Archer.

That would be fun! Last they checked in with him, Archer was complaining about the size of the rooms here. They should probably make sure he wasn't going to destroy something that belonged to their new allies: that would be annoying to deal with.

They were only back in the headquarters of Chaldea for one day and already they could tell that this would be a lot of fun!


	39. Wreck (Cen and Lucian)

Cen and Lucian were lazily curled on the bed. They were reading several mythological texts to try and predict what Servants Chaldea will encounter next, and so far all they've concluded is that mythology is a lot more boring when it's in books. Maybe they should just ask the Servants instead if they remember anything from the Throne? Hm. Maybe not.

The door to the room opened, and on instinct, they shuffled around so they could see who walked in.

It was Kadoc, and he had a blush that spread all the way to his ears. Cen and Lucian scooted to the side to allow their friend to collapse on the bed and groan into the pillow.

Propping themselves up on their elbows, they turned to look at Kadoc, book forgotten. “What's up?”

There was a muffled noise of dismay, and they chuckled. They leaned down to playfully nip at one red ear, delighting in the shiver that went down his spine.

“We can't hear you if you've got your face in the pillow, you know?”

Kadoc turned over to look at them briefly, before looking away.

“Arthur kissed me…”

Raising an eyebrow, Cen and Lucian leaned back on their hands. “...And?”

“Argh, I mean, he kissed my hand and I think, maybe, just maybe, Ihaveatinyittybittycrushonhim?”

The last words were said so fast they could barely make it out. After a moment, they chuckled.

“Well if you have a crush on him, then why not date him?”

Kadoc shot up, staring at them with wide eyes, flushing even deeper.

“I- You did listen when I said relationships are usually between two people right?!”

They shrugged. “Yeah, but that's normally right? We don't mind, as long as he makes you happy, you don't leave us behind, and he doesn't mind the fact you're dating us too.”

Kadoc pulled the pillow over his head and grumbled something they couldn't make out. They tilted their head.

“Sorry, we didn't catch that, try again?”

The pillow shifted slightly, before Kadoc's hair peeked out from under it. “Feels like I'm cheating on you…”

“Eh, cheating?”

“Being unfaithful to you romantically…”

How did he come to that conclusion? Sometimes, they thought that Kadoc really overthought things- life would be better and easier if he wasn't worrying so much!

“But you're telling us you have a crush on Saber, and are quite worried about it, but we said it's okay if you wanna date him too? We think you're worrying too much about it. How are you being unfaithful to us if we say it's okay? You told us about it and we talked it out, isn't that how relationships work?”

Kadoc’s logic made their head spin.

Sitting up, Kadoc sighed. “…Yeah but… it just… it feels wrong… Just… don't tell Arthur. I know you mean well but… just don't tell him okay?”

Cen and Lucian sighed, before hugging Kadoc close and burying their face in his hair. Mmm, smells like citrus.

“Yeah, alright. Well, it's your decision in the end: we're just saying there's no need to worry if we disapprove.” They mumbled into his hair.

Leaning back, Kadoc sighed and tilted his head back, capturing their lips in a kiss. They hummed happily, before playfully swiping their tongue across his mouth, and sliding it inside when he moaned. They sucked on his tongue briefly, before playing with the piercing in his tongue before pulling away.

Kadoc's pupils were wide, and he was panting softly. Cen and Lucian brought up a finger and playfully poked his nose.

“Cute~”

With a huff Kadoc sagged against their chest once more. “Tease…”

They chuckled. “But you like it~”

“I… Yeah, I do.”

Giggling, Lucian leaned back and grabbed the book they were looking at, and tried to remember where they were.

“...You’re looking at myths?”

“Yeah, trying to figure out possible Servants we can be facing for the last singularity, anything to help give us an edge… You can help us if you want, since you love mythology.”

Kadoc's eyes brightened. “I’d be glad to help!”

With a nod, they pulled one stack of the books towards him.

“These are all the oldest so most likely to be powerful if they show up, if you wanna start there? We tried to list down potential candidates by story, potential strengths and weaknesses, and each list gets sorted by region as well...”

The next several hours were spent in companionable silence as the pair were trying to determine likely allies or enemies for the next singularity. Sure most of it was guesswork, but due to the nature of Heroic Spirits, their research was unlikely to go to waste.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No NTR here.


	40. Mutual (Cen and Lucian)

Cen and Lucian peered up as Saber stepped into the bedroom. Pushing the paperwork aside, they looked at him. Strangely, the man seemed to be embarrassed, unable to meet their eyes.

“Hiya, what's up?”

“Do you remember what you said, when I was yelling at you for dating Kadoc?”

Raising an eyebrow, they thought back to that argument many months ago. Why was he bringing it back up now?

“Yeah, why?”

“I think… something you said back then… might have more truth than either of us thought.”

Cen and Lucian blinked. What was Saber getting at?

“I think I may have romantic feelings for Kadoc.”

The response came swiftly after only a moment’s pause. “Then date him if he's okay with it. We’re sure he'd love it.”

“But he’s your boyfriend. It isn't proper. It's unbecoming of me to have romantic feelings with someone in a committed relationship.”

...Oh god. Was this really happening right now? Were both of these idiots in love with each other but refused to do anything about it? Hell, they even said they wouldn't mind! To both of them!

“We aren't sure what the problem is? We really truly do not mind if you want to date him, as long as you’re okay with him dating us at the same time! You'll make him happy! We want him to be happy, he deserves it.”

Saber sighed, before wandering over towards where they were sitting on the bed. Cen and Lucian pushed the paperwork to the side to let the man sit down.

“How familiar are you with my legend?”

“Uh, not very. We know you're the King of Knights, you led the Knights of the Round Table, you pulled Caliburn from the Stone, and later wielded Excalibur. We never really were good at mythology. Couldn’t focus on it too much.”

Saber closed his eyes and sighed. “I see. So you are unaware of how my kingdom collapsed. The start of the collapse was Lancelot’s affair with my wife, Guinevere.”

…Was this real? This sounded like a plot straight out of one of those romance novels that one orange haired mademoiselle liked to read…

“But we assume that you didn't know of and encourage that relationship?”

“…I feel you're missing the point here.”

Funny. They felt the same way.

“Ugh, nevermind…”

Saber sighed and rolled onto his stomach. They were silent for a long moment, before mentally prodding Archer.

_ “Archer, why do humans have to be so complicated! Kadoc and Saber have crushes on each other but they won't just confess to each other! We even said we would be okay if they dated each other if Saber was okay with the fact Kadoc is still dating us! Why do they have to make it so difficult!” _

There was a long pause, before Archer started to laugh maniacally.

_ “...Hey! Archer-! It's not funny-! Stop laughing you asshole-!” _


	41. Suffering (Cen and Lucian)

Gods above why the hell was this so difficult. It had been two months since Saber and Kadoc confessed they liked each other to them, but all they were doing was dancing around each other awkwardly. At first they could understand, but… as the months went on… well. It was getting painful as hell to watch. One of them accidentally brushed the other’s hand in the hall, and then they were awkwardly apologizing. It was literally like a scene in one of those trashy romance movies he watched with the orange haired mademoiselle once. That was horrible. Never again.

At this rate, it would only be a matter of time before other people started noticing. Kadoc didn't really like people butting into his private life so hopefully they'd get it straightened out soon before that happened.

Cen and Lucian put their head face down on the table in their arms and groaned.

There was a pause before the Servant sitting across from them spoke. “Is something the matter?”

“Ugh, brother, what do you do if two people that clearly love each other don't wind up confessing and just avoid the topic all together?!” They whined.

Assassin raised an eyebrow.

“Is this about Kadoc and Arthur?”

They shifted so one eye was staring at the french Servant.

“Oh man, even you noticed?”

Assassin chuckled. “Hardly. Marie though, she has. Though, I'm surprised you seem fine with it: considering she is under the impression that they're going to start an affair any day now.”

They looked around, before carefully sketching a bounded field around the table.

And… there! Now no one that had blood or was magically connected to someone with blood, could cross. Or eavesdrop. Assassin raised an eyebrow as he sipped from his teacup.

“Ugh, but can it even be called an affair if both of them came to us to confess they loved each other? And that we said it was okay if they wanted to date as long as Saber was okay with the fact we were dating Kadoc too?”

Assassin blinked. “...Maybe not. Though that is… unusual.”

They grumbled and reached for their own teacup, before taking a sip of the decaffeinated coffee within.

“We thought it made sense. Saber likes Kadoc. Kadoc likes Saber. Saber makes Kadoc happy. We want Kadoc to be happy. We don't understand why it's such a big deal, even after both of them explained why they thought it was a problem.”

Assassin snorted, before he reached over to ruffle their hair. “Your way of thinking about things truly is unique. You must be really frustrated if you're venting to me.”

Sighing softly, they leaned into the touch, and hummed an affirmative. “Yeah. We told Archer but the asshole just laughed at us.”

“Yes, Gilgamesh seems like the type to do so.”

“Indeed. Though, please don't tell the queen about this. We don't need to hear the rumors get worse. We don't think the situation is bad enough to call for intervention yet. Yeah we want to smash our heads against the wall every time we see them interact these days, but they aren't hurting each other out of their misguided attempts to be respectful to us. Yet. If they start doing so by avoiding each other we will reconsider. We want them to attempt to sort it out on their own.”

Assassin nodded and mimed zipping his lips. “Don't worry, my lips are sealed. She won't hear about it from me.”

Leaning back, they let the bounded field dissolve and gave Assassin a teasing wink as the Servant took another sip of his tea. “So, what's up with you? Have you confessed to the dear queen yet? Please for the sake of our sanity don't act like those two noble idiots.”

The next moment, they were ducking and laughing as Assassin spat out his drink, an embarrassed flush high on his cheeks. That was a no then.


	42. Lost (Cen and Lucian)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The suffering continues. Pretty sure this chapter is vaguely M rated.

Cen and Lucian groaned as Saber walked past Kadoc, and very deliberately turned around and walked the other way. This was getting absurd. Month three and if anything, it appeared as if they were having a fight. One quarter of a year.

Gods.

They bounced up to Kadoc, but faltered as they noticed the hurt in his eyes.

Without a word, they pulled him into a side room and locked the door. They sat down on one of the crates in what must be a storeroom and cuddled him close. He shuddered, before burying his nose in their neck, his chest heaving. They stroked his hair and pressed their lips to his ear, murmuring softly.

“Shhh, it’s okay, we’re here. It's going to be okay.”

There was a soft hiccup. “But what if it's not going to be? What if Arthur never speaks to me again-? I-I love him so much, I love him and I love you and I… I just love both of you so much… Lucian, am I being selfish?” Kadoc curled his fingers into their chest.

God damnit Saber. Couldn't he see he was hurting Kadoc with his noble bullshit? Probably not. Sometimes he was blind unless faced with explicit evidence to the contrary. God knows he was blind to their personality until Camelot.

“It will be. We’ll make sure you get a happy ending, alright? One where all of us can be happy. Maybe it is selfish, but we don't care. We don't see a problem with you being selfish if Saber doesn't mind that you love both us and him deeply.”

Kadoc's hands clenched in their shirt, the ring on his right pointer finger slightly digging into their jacket. His other hand tilted their chin up, and he captured their lips in a needy kiss.

They tried to put in all their feelings, how much they cared for him, and how much they wanted him to be happy into it. They had no idea if he could tell, but they would try.

His tongue was tentatively prodding at their mouth, and they willingly parted their lips, letting Kadoc deepen the kiss at his leisure. He moaned softly, before he timidly stroked their tongue with his own. They groaned, before tangling their fingers into his hair and using the other hand to stroke his cheek, letting him lead.

After a few seconds, Kadoc pulled away, a blush standing out on his pale skin spreading from ear to ear.

Humming softly, they laid back against the top of the crate. They pulled him on top of them so their bodies were flush together, Kadoc’s face on their chest and their legs tangled together. He tilted his head and his fingers curled in their chest.

“Tell us what you need right now…”

Kadoc stiffened. “I… I want you to show that you love me- that I'm worth loving… please… I need it…”

That's it. They were gonna set Archer on Saber after this. Saber was their friend but damn if he wasn't being a moron right now.

Friends stop other friends from being morons right?

‘Cause shit, Saber was being so much of a moron that for once, Cen was cursing him out. That was… impressive in a depressing way, considering that “they” usually didn't speak that often, even mentally, unless “they” were really really pissed off or disagreed. Seems like Saber did the former.

Keeping a soft smile on their face so Kadoc wouldn't get the wrong idea, they rubbed small circles into his back. “Do you need more than cuddles and kisses?”

“...I… yes… please…”

Hmm… What could they give him that was more than cuddles and kisses?

Oh, didn't uh… gah, they forget who now… they had something called uh, a hickey? They asked Archer about it afterwards but he was too busy describing how to give someone one to actually clarify what it actually was after he finished laughing. Asshole. Well. At least that knowledge was possibly about to come in handy.

Hoping that was the right word, they sat up and pulled Kadoc into their lap. They traced one finger along the collar bone peeking out from under his shirt.

“Would you like it if we gave you a… a hickey right here?”

Kadoc choked on air, and his pupils went very wide. His next word came out in a needy whimper. “ _ Please. _ ”

Nodding, they slightly pulled his shirt down, before starting to suck a mark in the space between his collar bones.

“Ahh-! Lucian-!”

They smiled, and pulled away to look at the mark blooming on pale flesh. “Good?”

“I… I want one higher, I… please…”

Cen and Lucian paused. “Are you sure? We don't mind giving you as many as you want, but you might not be able to cover them up if we go too high. Are you okay with that?”

“...Please, I want one so high I can't cover it up so that… everyone knows that someone loves me… that I belong to you…”

They brought a hand up to lightly caress his cheek. “If that is what you want, we’ll give it to you.”

They turned his head to the side, and started to suck a new mark underneath his jaw. Kadoc squirmed slightly under their ministrations, panting and whimpering. After a few moments, they were done.

“There.” They tucked Kadoc close to them, folding him up so he was curled against their chest and lightly kissed the top of his head. “We will stay here as long as you need… okay?”

Kadoc nodded. “Thank you…”

“Sleep if you need it, alright? We'll stay.”

There was no answer, but Kadoc’s grip loosened as they rubbed circles into his back and started singing a lullaby. By the fifth or so song, Kadoc’s breathing took on the gentle rhythm of sleep.

_ “Archer, are you still angry at Saber?” _

_ “You have to ask? Did that cur hurt you?” _

_ “Not us, but Kadoc. Saber’s stupid sense of nobility is hurting him. We don't really know what to do anymore…” _

Archer heaved a mental sigh.  _ “That cur… Very well. I’ll take care of it. I'll make sure he realizes what a fool he is.” _

Sending a mental thanks to Archer, they leaned back and sighed. Clearly this problem wasn't going to solve itself anymore. But what could they do about it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact this chapter basically wrote itself.


	43. Obligation (Gudao)

Gudao groaned and rubbed the back of his neck. He had no idea what the hell was going on between Arthur and Kadoc lately, but they needed to sort it out. The last singularity was coming up, and they couldn't afford any discontent…

The two were avoiding each other, Arthur spending most of his time with the Knights of the Round Table and Kadoc spending most of his time with his friends.

He sighed as Lucian rounded the corner, a spring in their step. Maybe they would know what was going on.

Leaning out to catch their wrist, he was unprepared for when Lucian’s response was to try and punch him in the face before they realized who he was.

“Oh. Fujimaru. Don't do that please.”

Yeah, he’d seen them punch Gilgamesh once, and if it was enough to stun him he didn’t want to find out what that punch would do to him…

“Noted. I wanted to ask you something. Do you know why Arthur and Kadoc are fighting?”

Lucian’s face went through a variety of reactions before settling on exasperation.

“Because they're both being  _ idiots _ ! Saber moreso!”

Was that a whine? It definitely was.

“Have you tried talking to them?”

“ _ Yes! _ At least once a week now… at least until Saber started avoiding us… ugh… We are pretty sure all of Chaldea knows by now…”

Well, they weren't wrong. It's been the hot topic lately… Even if no one was quite sure  _ why _ they were avoiding each other…

Lucian paused, before looking at Gudao. “Oh oh, can you speak with Saber about it?”

Gudao was skeptical. What was he even supposed to tell Arthur? He told them this.

“Argh, we don't know what we can tell you without betraying  _ someone’s  _ trust… Man, this is hard… Um, maybe telling Saber by pushing Kadoc away he's only hurting him? That should work, maybe… We think…”

Sounds general enough. “Got it.”

Lucian beamed.

/////

Gudao finally found Arthur in what was swiftly becoming known as the “Camelot Room” with his head on a table and the other male members of the Knights of the Round (except Bedivere) were either patting him on the back or laughing. It was a good thing they were getting along, even though these weren't the knights that served under the male King of Knights.

Gawain waved him over and pulled out a chair. Gudao thanked him, before sitting down.

“You should just tell the lucky lady you love her Arthur!” Gawain commented. “Nothing is happening if you just sit here and mope!”

Arthur mumbled something into the table, something Gudao couldn't make out. He had no idea what was going on.

“Gudao, do you have any suggestions for Arthur? He is being stubborn on this.” Tristan said blandly.

The protest was immediate. “For good reason! I do not want to cause needless strife!”

“Yeah well, you failed there I think. Lucian has a message for you.” Gudao pointed out.

The dawning horror on Arthur's face was interesting. Apparently the last few times Lucian tried to speak with him didn't go well. Arthur made a sound of dismay.

“Well, what do they have to say?”

….It sounded like he was a man condemned to his grave.

“Something along the lines of how by pushing Kadoc away you're only hurting him, instead of… whatever you're trying to achieve.”

Arthur ducked his head.

“Ohoho? Is the person you love a lovely lad instead-?” Gawain chuckled.

The (embarrassed) response was immediate. “Sh-shut up-!”

“Oh, they are! Who is it?”

Gudao had no idea that the Knights of the Round were such gossips.

“Ugh. You're all  _ vultures _ . Fine. It's…” Arthur trailed off, whispering what Gudao assumed was a name he could not hear. Apparently the name was incredibly unexpected, as all the Knights stopped ribbing the King of Knights. Lancelot was actually cringing.

“Look. I can't help it alright?!”

Arthur sounded really stressed out, as if he was bottling this up for a while. Gudao stayed quiet- it was good for him to get this off his chest since it seemed he didn't even tell the other knights.

“Does err, is his… lover aware?” Lancelot was definitely feeling awkward. Gudao wasn't sure if he wanted to know what about this situation put  _ that _ expression on his face…

“Yes, that's part of the problem-!” Arthur muttered something else too low for human ears.

Whatever it was must have been some kind of bombshell, as Lancelot looked aghast, Tristan opened his eyes slightly, and Gawain looked shocked.

“You are  _ sure _ they said that?” Lancelot muttered.

Gudao had a suspicion of who Arthur loved now. He wasn't sure if he was right but… Well. If he was, then that put Arthur avoiding Kadoc into a new light.

“Very. Considering it was repeated several times afterwards.” Arthur sighed.

The knights winced collectively. Gudao sighed and pushed his chair out and he stretched.

“Arthur, I want to help you. I really do. But I can't if I don't know what the problem is. All I know for sure is that something happened with you and Kadoc and now you are avoiding him.”

Arthur seemed to be weighing his options carefully. Suddenly, he let out a defeated sigh.

“I love him and I'm not sure what to do, considering he's dating Lucian.”

Ah, considering the reaction of the other Knights, he wasn't too surprised. Especially when you factored in what had caused the downfall of Camelot…

Gudao winced.

“Does Lucian know?”

Arthur flushed. “When I told them about it, they told me to date him if he was okay with it, and that they didn't mind. Except why would he be? He loves Lucian very much.”

That was… an interesting solution. Not one he would have immediately jumped to, but apparently one the other Master had. Gudao shook his head once so he wouldn't dwell on Lucian’s oddities. He's not sure how he became a counsellor for Heroic Spirits but he would try his best. “Uh well, have you asked?”

Arthur shook his head. “I have not. It's improper of me.”

“More improper than hurting Kadoc by pushing him away?”

Silence. Arthur looked down at the table.

“I don't know…”

And there lay the crux of the problem. Gudao wasn't sure how to solve this at all. He could say confidently this had never happened to someone he knew before. Maybe he'd have to have another word with Lucian later on… Gudao had a suspicion the other Master could offer more insight… 


	44. Clarification (Gudao)

After wringing out the entire details of what was going on from Lucian, Gudao was pinching the bridge of his nose and groaning. He had to agree with Lucian. The two were being idiots.

So now they were here, where Gudao, Kadoc, and Arthur were all sitting around a table in a private room of the Salon. Both of them were unable to meet the other’s eye.

“Right. Here is what I understand.” Gudao laid out what he knew about this, and Kadoc dipped his head in embarrassment.

As he finished, Gudao sighed.

“Look, normally, I would be all for letting you two solve this on your own, but Lucian had been trying that for months and it's clearly not working. They're at wit’s end about this I think…” Gudao took a deep breath, then continued. “Nothing you say here would be leaving this room unless you choose for it to, but we should all get everything out in the open, I think.”

There was silence, and then Kadoc peered up at Arthur. “I… you really-?”

Arthur nodded. Kadoc laughed, and in a move he clearly got from Lucian, leapt across the table to give Arthur a hug.

Gudao stood up quietly as the pair finally resolved what had been plaguing them for months. He crept towards the exit of the room, and left the room to give them some privacy. He had a feeling they would be alright now.

He passed Lucian in the hallway and waved to the other Master. They stopped fidgeting with something in their sleeves and looked at him hopefully.

“Yeah, it went well, I think they'll be just fine now.” He reported.

Lucian let out a relieved laugh. “Good, good. We were getting frustrated ‘cause they both kept complaining to us about it. Life is way too short for them to keep that up. Thanks Fujimaru.”

Gudao nodded. “Thanks for bringing it to my attention.”

Humming, the other Master spun on their heels. “We are gonna go look for Archer now-! Byebye!”

Without a further word, Lucian skipped off.

Chuckling at their antics, Gudao decided to make his way to the beach area and relax. He really didn't feel like doing any more work today…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The exciting (?) resolution.


	45. Appreciate (Kadoc)

Kadoc looked askance at da Vinci. She had just claimed that they had managed to fit a beach section into Chaldea? How? Apparently he wasn't the only one with questions as a furor broke out.

He listened carefully to the questions being tossed around.

How long was this in development? Four months. Wow. That meant they started the work before the Chaldean team set out to resolve the America Singularity… How did they get it to work? Using a lesser grail. Why? Why not?

Someone from the clothing department started handing out… were those bathing suits?

He was handed a pair of white swim trunks with a design in blue down the side with a matching towel. He looked next to him at Lucian, who was scrutinizing their own pair of dark blue swim trunks and had a white towel with dark blue accents on their head.

Da Vinci finished speaking, and everyone ambled off in order to enjoy the new beach section.

/////

Kadoc looked around, trying to figure out where his friend got to. They said they weren't going to change into their swim trunks, and said they would lay their towel down somewhere. So where… ah. Walking over towards Lucian, he noticed his friend had taken off their shoes and were sitting on their towel and curling their toes in the sand. To his amusement, the dark blue swim trunks were folded neatly next to the towel and their shoes were on top.

“This is nice, we've never been to a beach before. That's what this is supposed to emulate, right?”

Kadoc nodded before he laid out his own towel next to theirs and laid down.

“The sand feels nice between our toes.”

Chuckling, Kadoc turned over so he could see the wonder in his friend’s face as they took in the scenery. The awe in their face made them look so innocent, a rare occurrence.

He heard the sound of happy screams, and sat up as Gabby and Gudao blew past them. Gabby paused, and turned around and doubled back towards them.

“You guys aren't going into the water?” She seemed genuinely confused.

“We,” here, Lucian pointed to themself so there was no confusion, “can't swim.” Lucian said blithely.

Kadoc turned towards Lucian. They couldn't swim? He didn't know that. How did that not get brought up when they were in Okeanos?

“Well, you're not going to at least change into your bathing suit?” Gabby asked. She seemed confused.

“Don't wanna. We don't like showing a lot of skin. There's a reason we always wear turtleneck long sleeved shirts and pants.”

That, at least. Kadoc knew. He wasn’t sure if he could take any more surprises today…

“Then what are you going to do with…” Gabby gestured towards the folded up bathing suit.

“Dunno…” Suddenly, they turned towards him. “Do you want it Kadoc? We're about the same size… We think…”

Gabby opened her mouth to ask something else, before Gudao called for her from further down the beach. She closed her mouth, and ran after her friend.

After a moment as he watched Gabby go, his friend turned towards him, the swim trunks in their hand.

“Do you want them?” They tilted their head.

Not seeing any reason not to take them, he shrugged and patted the space next to him. Lucian refolded the trunks and beamed, before they decided to sit down in the sand next to him.

He was glad they were having fun. There was a sudden glint in their eyes, before they launched themselves at his back, laughing happily. Kadoc started laughing as well, before he rolled them both over and slid his fingers under their shirt so he could tickle his friend’s sides.

“A-Ah-! That t-t-t-tickles-!” His friend gasped out, their sides heaving. “Ka-aah-Kadoc-!”

His friend squirmed under his fingers, giggling and squealing. Kadoc’s own laughter quieted, but he could still feel his own grin. He lightly ran his fingers down their sides, and his friend laughed again.

He kept up his ticklish assault for a few seconds more, before withdrawing his fingers. Lucian’s laughter quieted, before they leaned against him, cheeks flushed from exertion.

“Hey hey, watch out, we won't be caught off guard next time~!”

Kadoc chuckled softly. “You're so ticklish, it's adorable.”

There was a pause before suddenly he let out a startled gasp as he felt his friend returning the favor, a playful grin on their face.

Oh, that's how they wanted to play today huh? Kadoc grinned, before his fingers slid under his friend's shirt to pick up where he left off.


	46. Rumor (Gabrielle)

Gabrielle paused from chasing Gudao down the beach to watch from afar as Kadoc pinned Lucian to the ground and started tickling them. She was worried that Lucian would feel left out because they didn't want to change into swim trunks, but that seemed to be an empty fear. Lucian was giggling loudly enough that several people had paused what they were doing to stop and look.

As she watched, Kadoc stopped tickling his friend, and they both leaned against each other for a few moments. Lucian said something quietly to Kadoc, before suddenly, the tables had turned and they were tickling him instead. Not to be outdone, Kadoc immediately went back to tickling his friend. Soon enough, both of them were rolling around on the sand trying their best to make the other person give in first. It was really cute.

There was a reason there was a betting pool on when they would finally start dating ever since she found out they were not, in fact dating. Yet.

Kadoc managed to have won the tickle war by sitting on his friend's shoulders and tickling them into submission. Once Lucian said that they yielded, Kadoc said something into their ear that she couldn't catch.

“Y-Ye-ahahah-! We promise we won't sneak attack tickle you-!” Lucian gasped out.

Satisfied, Kadoc crawled off his friend's shoulders before laying down on his towel. After a moment, Lucian curled up next to him, their head on Kadoc’s chest, looking very much like a contented cat. Gabrielle cooed as Kadoc brought one arm around Lucian’s torso.

Someone tapped her on the shoulder and she jumped and whirled around to see Gudao.

“Why'd you stop playing tag with me?”

Gabrielle turned and tilted her head at the scene. “Aren't they just  _ adorable _ together Gudao?”

Gudao snorted softly. “You're still rooting for them to get together then?”

“Of course! They're so cute together, their relationship is the cutest I've ever seen!”

She could see the exact moment where Gudao stopped listening to her, but that was alright. She was sure that the other girls would appreciate her ramblings instead. She couldn't wait to share it with those of them that didn't get to witness it for themselves!


	47. Faith (Cen and Lucian)

Ah, it was a nice night out. Clear skies, and the moon was bright. Cen and Lucian were sitting on the rooftop above where the living King of Uruk had offered the Chaldean team lodgings. They heard faint footsteps but didn't turn around.

“It is a nice night.”

The made an agreeable noise, and tried to pick out some of the constellations they could recognize.

After a moment, the silence was broken. “Why do you follow my younger and more foolish counterpart? He treats you like a nuisance, at best.”

They closed their eyes. Is that how other people perceived how they acted with Archer? They turned around so they could look at the living King of Uruk.

“Long ago, he was one of few people that believed in us. That we were more than just some broken tool that nobody wanted. Before Chaldea, we could count people like that to us on one hand and have fingers left over.”

“But he often talks about you as if you are merely an object in his, in our vast treasury.”

“That may be true, but that means we are worth  _ something _ , are we not? Back then, most saw us as nothing more than dirt to be ground under their shoes. Being seen as a treasure to be guarded was… better.”

The living King of Uruk was silent for a long while. They leaned back on the roof and stared up at the night sky. It really was pretty, when there wasn't lights from cities blocking it out.

“But surely once you got to Chaldea, you could see how others treated you, right? Did they not treat you better?”

They heaved a sigh and closed their eyes. “Aside from Kadoc, we still were the grime beneath others’ shoes. Most people thought we were weird and freakish back then. So still, Archer treated us better than most. Even if he was abrasive about it.”

There was a sigh, and then some rustling of clothing. “I still do not understand, most of what I have observed between you and he is him getting snappish at you, and you reacting patiently.”

They opened one eye and turned to see the living King of Uruk had sat down next to them. “We think he's stressed. It must be hard for hum to watch one of his treasures be ruined by the King of Magic.”

“...Your faith in him something to be praised.”

They chuckled lightly. “We don't know about that, we just think that deep down, he cares, but he's been made bitter by what he's seen. And his response to what the world threw at him is to hold everything and everyone at arm’s length. We are alike in that regard.”

The living King of Uruk was silent, before he stood up.

“In your opinion, do you think the other me can change?”

The question caused a surprised laugh to fall from their lips. “What a silly question.  _ You _ changed did you not?”

That surprised a laugh out of the living King of Uruk as well. “I see. I think I understand now. Thank you for the conversation, I must be getting back to work. Do get some sleep soon.”

“Mmm, we could say the same to you.”

The living King of Uruk chuckled softly. “Good night.”

Without a further response, he walked back down off of the roof, ending the conversation. 


	48. Bond (Gilgamesh)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minor(?) spoilers for Babylonia Singularity.

“Ne, ne, Archer-” His treasure, no, Lucian started. He held up a hand to stall them. They closed their mouth and peered at him curiously, and rolled on the bed so they were on their stomach and facing him.

“Gilgamesh.” He interrupted calmly.

They tilted their head. “We called you Archer for a long time, what changed?”

“You call both… Arthur and Sanson by theirs. Or at least part of theirs.”

The head turned so it was tilted the other way. “Is this about what happened in Babylonia?”

Partially. After all, his time amongst his own people reminded him that even if he was the one True King there would be no harm in affording others the respect they deserved. After all, they did try their best to save his kingdom.

He could still remember the words of that… Kingu. How he was unworthy of meeting his friend once more because of the person he became. Even if they were only said to anger him, the deep gashes they carved still remained.

When his counterpart had told him about how he let his pride get in the way of protecting his country, he could not deny it. Even if none of the others in Chaldea were his friends, he could at least call them by name.

He could not help but think that was the kind of person Enkidu hoped for him to be.

They chewed their lip thoughtfully. “Can we call you Gil instead? Please?”

“You may.”

They nodded, before latching onto his arm. “Gil, are you alright? You seem really sad now…”

Gilgamesh sighed, before pulling them into his lap. “I suppose I am. It's hard when I remember how my kingdom was razed to the ground.”

Arms loosely encircled his waist and Lucian leaned their head on his shoulder, offering silent comfort.

It was just a reminder of how far his treasure had come, yet he remained stagnant.

He still recalled the conversation they had late at night with his living counterpart. They believed he could change, even after all this time. He was shocked at how even when they had no reason to believe they had to defend him, they did.

Even before then, they defended him in little ways. He recalled one instance when someone said that he was an asshole. They agreed blithely with that person before going on to say that he may be rude, but he wasn't a bad person.

All this time, he was taking them for granted. Holding them at arm’s length, never letting them get too close but at the same time letting them get closer than everyone else.

No more.

He placed a hand on their head, tangling his fingers into the black locks. He leaned down so his lips were brushing their ear. These next words were for them and them alone.

“I, the king, am sorry.”

They stiffened in shock. “What for?”

“For taking you for granted. For seeing you as merely an object for my treasury. You have been by my side all this time, and even if you often annoyed me, when it really mattered, you stood by my side. For all of that and more, I am sorry.”

Lucian was silent for several moments. “Thank you… for apologizing. You didn't have to. We just want you to be the best you can be.”

Gilgamesh carded his fingers through their hair and they sighed in pleasure. “I had to. I promise to you, going forward, I will do my best to become a king that you can be proud of.”

“That sounds wonderful…”

Yes. It was the very least he could do for both Enkidu and the one that stood loyally at his side since his summoning to this era.


	49. Abnormal (Enkidu)

Enkidu watched the other Servants carefully as Gudao gave him a tour. Gudao had stated that Gil was also here, but they had yet to cross paths with him. When he had inquired about how his friend was doing, Gudao stated that Gil was fine, but acting more respectful to others lately.

“Oh, Enkidu, look-!” Gudao pointed down a hallway, and Enkidu caught the first glimpse of his friend after so long.

Before their eyes, he and Gudao watched as someone tackled Gil, before clinging on to his back and throwing their arms around his neck. Enkidu was getting ready to intervene because ‘being more respectful’ didn't mean he would be alright with someone clinging to him.

To Enkidu’s shock, Gil simply laughed, before hooking his arms around the person's legs. The person hummed, before resting their chin on his head.

He looked at Gudao, who was slack jawed at what he had just witnessed. Apparently this was very unusual. Was his king okay?

Taking several quick steps towards Gil, Enkidu stopped a few feet in front of him. He could not remember such a carefree look on Gil’s face ever since they had defeated the Bull of Heaven.

The noise caused the person on Gil’s back to pause and turn towards him, before nudging Gil and whispering something in his ear.

Gil let them go and they hopped off as Gil turned towards him.

“Enkidu… is that truly you?”

Enkidu nodded.

“I cannot believe that you and I were able to meet once more.”

Enkidu nodded again. He saw the person that had tackled Gil try and sneak away. “Wait-!”

They faltered mid step at his exclamation. “Yes?”

“What is your name?”

The person, now that he was looking at them, was incredibly androgynous, with messy black hair and differently colored eyes, one red and one gray. They were wearing a black jacket that was fastened at their neck with sleeves that went past their hands. They had a bright yellow shirt underneath, along with black pants. For some reason, they were also barefoot.

“Lucian!”

Their voice sounded very nice, it reminded him of birdsong.

“Lucian, what happened to your shoes?”

Oh, so this person normally did not go barefoot? Curious.

“Left them with Arty. We saw Gil walking and wanted to surprise him!”

How strange. They used ‘we’ as a personal pronoun, and called Gil by that nickname. Based on Gil’s lack of reaction, he was used to it.

He wondered what kind of relationship they had.

“Wait, since when did you start calling him ‘Gil’?!”

Hmm, another oddity. He really wanted to get to know this Lucian better, after he had caught up with Gil first.

“Yesterday, why? Is that wrong?”

Gudao sighed. “No, just curious. You’ve been calling him ‘Archer’ for years, haven't you? Why the change?”

Lucian shrugged, and turned to Gil. “We're gonna go back with Arty now. You probably have a lot you want to say to your friend, right? You can come find us later.”

Once Gil nodded, Lucian dashed back the way they came. Gil turned to Enkidu and smiled.

“Enkidu. I have much I wish to share with you. Come to my room and we can talk there.”

Enkidu looked at Gudao, who nodded. “I haven't finished giving Enkidu the tour yet though.”

Gil held up one hand. “I'll take care of it after we speak.”

Gudao nodded, before he walked back down the hall. Once he was out of sight, Gil turned down the way Lucian ran off.

“My room is this way.”

Once they got there, Enkidu resolved to ask Gil about Lucian. Gil had sworn not to have another friend before he turned back to clay, but yet, he clearly cared for Lucian.

Enkidu hoped that Gil had found happiness.


	50. Ordinary (Kadoc, Enkidu)

“That did  _ not _ just happen. There is  _ no way _ that just happened.”

Arthur said in disbelief as he set down his controller. Lucian cackled as the results screen came up, showing that they had just barely managed to pass Arthur at the last moment. It was just enough for them to win the set overall.

Kadoc snorted softly. He wasn't as good at this game as either of his significant others, but it was still fun to play. Though, he had to be coaxed by both of them to try the game at first.

It was amusing how they were so competitive when it came to games but got along well otherwise.

Every so often, Lucian managed to eke out a win narrowly to the point of disbelief.

“Seriously, how did that even happen?!”

Lucian was cackling so hard they were bracing themself on Arthur's shoulder. Kadoc reached over to pat Arthur on the back.

The sound of the door to the Game Room opened, and he turned towards it as Gilgamesh poked his head in, before walking in and gesturing to someone behind him.

Ah, that was… Enkidu, right? Hopefully the real Enkidu and not the false one in Babylonia. Though if Enkidu was next to Gilgamesh, it was unlikely it was the false Enkidu.

“What happened here?” Enkidu was curious.

“We were playing Mario Kart and Lucian just barely beat Arthur.”

Gilgamesh winced. Ah that's right, didn't something similar happen to him once before?

“You have my sympathies Arthur. I too know the feeling of Lucian yanking a victory from right underneath your feet…”

Enkidu turned towards Gilgamesh curiously. “You've played this game before? Is it fun?”

“Yes, this and others. It's fun… as long as Lucian doesn't yank victory from right under your feet.”

“That happens often?”

Gilgamesh sighed as he sat down next to Lucian on the arm of the couch. “Often enough.”

Clearing his throat, Kadoc got Enkidu’s attention. “My name is Kadoc Zemlupus, you're Enkidu, right?”

There was a soft laugh before Enkidu sat down on the floor between the couch and the TV. “I am. It's nice to meet you. I've met Lucian already.”

Kadoc raised an eyebrow, silently asking for clarification. “They had tackled Gil as I was being shown around by Gudao. I was quite surprised, and I think Gudao was too!”

“Really? It wouldn't have been the first time, and probably not the last either…”

Enkidu laughed. “Yes, Gil said the same! I have not heard Gil laugh like he did when Lucian hopped on his back in a long time!”

Oh? Usually, Gilgamesh reacted with (mostly hidden) fond exasperation when Lucian did that. He turned to Gilgamesh for clarification, and put a hand to his mouth as he saw that Lucian had crawled on top of Gilgamesh’s shoulders, and had their elbows in his hair. The Servant had a soft smile on his face, and… yeah, Kadoc could believe that the King of Heroes laughed this time Lucian tackled him.

Arthur gave himself a shake, and finally seemed to notice that someone else had joined them alongside Gilgamesh.

“Oh, sorry for my rudeness. My name is Arthur Pendragon.” He chuckled nervously and scratched the back of his head.

“That's quite alright! I had a nice chat with Kadoc!”

Arthur nodded. Lucian hummed, and they looked at Enkidu. “Do you want to learn how to play?”

Enkidu shook his head. To Kadoc, it appeared that he was more interested in watching Gilgamesh interact with Lucian instead.  “Not this time, but thank you.”

“Okay! Kadoc, are you playing this round too?”

Nodding, he picked his controller back up.

……

Enkidu smiled as he watched the party of humans and Servants play. It appeared that Lucian was perfectly happy with their perch on Gil’s shoulders, even as they were playing.

Gil had told him about Lucian, and he was fascinated that someone had faith his friend, even during his worst times. And in return, it seemed that Gil treated them like a close friend, even if he didn't call them that.

He had seen how the other residents of Chaldea treated Gil as they walked. Apprehensive. Wary. He couldn't blame them as Gil acted stiffly towards them in turn.

However with this group, Gil dropped his stiffness, leaving behind the side of himself that Enkidu always saw.

Later on, Enkidu would have to thank them for it: he feared that Gil would never move on, and he was glad to have been proven wrong.


	51. Retire (Enkidu)

Enkidu hummed quietly as he walked back to the game room with Gil. After a few games, Gil continued to show Enkidu around the facility. It was amazing how much could fit into one mountain, even if magic was involved.

He liked the beach part the most, there was a forest attachment to it with golem wildlife: while it wasn't as good as a real forest, it was much better than the stark halls of the rest of Chaldea.

Gil promised to help him renovate his room to be closer to nature later. Apparently he would go on supply trips and bring something back for him. That was thoughtful of Gil.

Now, they were walking back to the game room when Enkidu expressed an interest in getting to talk with Lucian more.

The room was quiet. Odd. Enkidu pushed open the door, and smiled.

Arthur was lounging on the couch, with Kadoc on one side and Lucian on the other. The pale haired Master was quietly reading a book, and waved at him as he entered. Enkidu waved back even as Arthur put a finger to his lips. That made sense, considering Lucian was fast asleep for now.

Gil walked in behind him, and as his friend crossed the threshold, Lucian yawned and rubbed at their eyes.

Blinking once, Lucian sat up and stretched. “Oh, welcome back Gil. Did the tour go well?”

Sitting down on the floor in front of the couch, Enkidu spoke up. “Yes! I enjoyed the beach area very much!”

Before Lucian could reply, Gil huffed and sat down next to Lucian. “Why did you not tell me that you were tired?”

Surprised, Enkidu turned to look at him. Was that, offense? Why was Gil offended?

Lucian flopped onto Gil’s lap. “Well, you were busy showing Enkidu around, and we didn't want to intrude. So we took a nap with Arty.” They turned over and looked at his friend. “You know we sleep with Kadoc and Arty almost every night, why is this different?”

Gil crossed his arms and pouted. He actually pouted! Bringing a hand to his mouth, Enkidu tried to muffle his giggles.

“That's different!”

Huffing, Lucian curled up like a contented cat. “Is it?”

Clearly, Gil cared for them very much. In fact… “Gil, I didn't know you had another friend!”

Flushing, Gil started sputtering before he focused on Enkidu. Yes, that confirmed it. Even if Gil did not describe them as friends, he was clearly friends with Lucian.

Leaning back, Enkidu had a small smile on his face as he listened to Arthur start to tease Gil. Kadoc grabbed Lucian’s hand muttered something about going back to their room to finish their nap, before they snuck out of the room, leaving Arthur and Gil to their bickering.

Oh my, Arthur and Gil were also friends, but Gil wasn't as close with him as he was with Lucian. He wasn't sure if Kadoc was Gil’s friend just yet, but he had a feeling that he was.

Knowing that Gil had friends even after his death was like a balm to his soul, he was blessed to be allowed to witness these friendships firsthand.


	52. Ignite (Gilgamesh, Arthur)

Gilgamesh winced as the surfboard Lucian was floating on slipped out from under them and smacked into his chest. With a yelp, they went under the water, and flailed a bit before standing up in the shallows.

One thing was for sure, Lucian was  _ not _ a natural swimmer at all. Gilgamesh sighed before he pushed it back over to them.

“Try and stay in the middle of it.”

Lucian nodded, trying to stay afloat in the shallows. He made sure that if they did slip and fall under, they could just stand up and be alright. If for some reason they couldn't, he could prop them up.

For someone who could balance on a thin rope, they sure couldn't balance on a surfboard well at all. At least not when laying down on it.

Thankfully, the only issue they actually had with learning how to swim was because the bathing suits showed too much skin. That was easily remedied with a custom order for a full body wetsuit.

Lucian sighed. “This isn't working, let's try this instead…”

Gilgamesh watched as they managed to get both of their knees into the surfboard. Oh no, were they really going to-

They exhaled as they carefully stood up on the surfboard, only wobbling a little.

Eyeing them warily, Gilgamesh looked for any sign they would tip over.

“ **Look out** !”

Saying a quick prayer to the heavens above, Gilgamesh lunged towards the surfboard to tug it away before- nope.

Kadoc crashed into Lucian, sending both of them face down into the water with a yelp and the surfboards sliding away. Gilgamesh reached down, grabbed the scruff of the wetsuit, and hauled Lucian above the surface.

It seemed Arthur wasn't having much luck teaching the pale haired Master how to surf, if that was any indication. He looked out to the horizon to see Arthur paddling towards them with a sheepish look on his face, having grabbed the surfboard Kadoc was using.

“Sorry sorry, seems Kadoc’s Riding Skill is rank E…”

Gilgamesh rolled his eyes at the churlish joke, and watched as Kadoc surfaced before rolling onto his back and floating in the water.

“Do you want to try again? I think you almost had it that time!”

The response was immediate. “No, I'm good.”

Arthur chuckled, before sweeping damp bangs away from Kadoc’s face to kiss his forehead. The pale Master yelped in surprise, rolled over onto his stomach and crawled back onto the board.

Gilgamesh turned towards Lucian. “How about you?”

Lucian made a face as they treaded water. “Not anymore today. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe we will just stay here in the shallows for a while…”

Hmm… Gilgamesh thought it was time for a little revenge. When Lucian turned away, he ducked under the water, swam between Lucian’s legs, and stood up, raising them out of the water.

Their hands clenched his hair for a bit, before sliding down to his neck, laughing. “Gil-!”

“Since you like hopping on my back so much, how about this!”

Grabbing them by their knees, Gilgamesh went under the water and started to swim. It was a bit difficult to do so with his arms keeping Lucian in place, but he managed.

He kept and eye on his target and… there!

Lucian laughed as he passed by Arthur, and Gil attached his wetsuited cargo to the Saber’s back. His center of balance suddenly shifted, Arthur tipped forward with a grunt before using one hand to steady Lucian. They leaned down to whisper something in Arthur's ear, and the Saber smirked.

“Alright Gilgamesh, this means war!”

Spotting Kadoc floating by, he met the pale Master’s gaze in a silent question. After a moment, Kadoc nodded, and Gilgamesh hoisted him onto his shoulders before securing him.

“I'll try my best…” He muttered.

Gilgamesh nodded, and looked to try and find where the other two had gone- the shore-!

“Hold on tightly.”

Without further warning, Gilgamesh sped towards the shallows and leant down to grab one of the water guns and passed it to his passenger.

“I, the king, refuse to lo-argh-!”

Spitting out water from the well aimed shot, Gilgamesh glared at Lucian, who waved back cheerily as Arthur muffled snickers.

Very well, if they want a war, he would oblige them.

……

Arthur laughed as he dodged another water shot from Kadoc, before he felt Lucian bend in half to return fire from upside-down. How they could aim that accurately from that position was a mystery. Gilgamesh swore as he swerved to the side, before correcting his course and chasing after them.

They had been playing their impromptu game of tag for long enough the false sun was starting to set, and had attracted the attention of several other residents who started to cheer for their favorite side.

He felt Lucian’s hair tickle the nape of his neck as they leaned down to whisper in his ear. “Arty, next time they get close we are gonna jump on them, they won't expect it in time! When we tap the side of your head we are gonna jump!”

Arthur kept his face carefully blank even as he laughed inside. He nodded once, and Lucian hummed as they understood. He swerved around Hector’s beach chair before turning back to run towards Gilgamesh. Kadoc took aim, and Arthur ducked as the water sailed straight over his head.

Oh, oops. Both he and Gilgamesh paused to face the now soaked lancer as three voices apologized in unison. “Sorry Hector!”

Apologies made, Arthur started running back towards the entrance, Gilgamesh hot on his heels.

Lucian gave him the signal, and Arthur slackened his grip as he felt the weight on his shoulders increase slightly, before lessening as Lucian kicked off his back.

With a bitten off curse and a loud splash, Arthur turned around to view their handiwork with a wide grin.

Gilgamesh had tried to turn around when it was clear he couldn't stop the collision, and wound up falling into the shallows. The result was that- oh my. Gilgamesh was on his side, and the force of impact made Lucian and Kadoc’s face press together in a kiss.

Kadoc flailed a bit, before Lucian pulled away, caressing his cheek in apology. Kadoc paused, before he decided that it must not matter, as he pulled Lucian in for a deeper kiss, before pulling away and ducking to hide his flushed face.

“ _ You _ ,” Gilgamesh began as he spat sand out of his mouth and sat up, “are a goddamned _ menace _ .”

Lucian smirked. “Thanks for the compliment Gil! We try our best!”

Gilgamesh gave him a rude hand gesture. Lucian’s smirk turned into full blown laughter.

Kadoc carefully lowered himself off Gilgamesh’s back, before making his way towards Arthur.

“I think… they're gearing up for a round two…”

Arthur snorted. He could believe it.

“Though,” Kadoc continued, looking behind Arthur, “Dinner first.”

“Yeah. Who knows how much energy those two have left.” Arthur commented before raising his voice to where Gilgamesh and Lucian were standing.

“Oi! Dinner! Come over before we eat without you!”

There was silence, before they both started running over to the dinner pavilion. Arthur and Kadoc jumped out of the way, and turned to watch as Gilgamesh tripped Lucian causing them to take a dive into a sand dune.

“...Sometimes, those two are such  _ children _ .” Kadoc commented.

No arguments from him there.


	53. Unpleasant (Kadoc)

Kadoc coughed as he wandered the hallways looking for Doctor Roman. He woke up this morning feeling awful, and wanted to see if he was fit to deploy with the rest of the A-Team. 

Except… the doctor wasn't in the medical bay. The entire place seemed empty… oh right, the director wanted everyone to meet in the Command Room. So where…?

He paused as he heard the Doctor speaking with a voice he couldn't recognize. Ah… he was slacking it sounded like…

Coughing and bracing his hands on the wall, Kadoc pulled his blanket tighter around himself and stumbled towards the room where the voices were coming from.

He nearly tripped as the door opened automatically, and he felt a hand steady him.

“Oh, Kadoc! You look pretty bad, hold on-!”

Kadoc stared as Doctor Roman ran out of the room, leaving him alone with the stranger. He couldn't recognize him, so maybe he was a new arrival? Or was his fever that bad?

“It's me Gudao. Don't you remember? We have lunch together on Sundays.”

Apparently, his fever was really that bad if he couldn't recognize Gudao… Though, he only barely recognized the doctor by his distinctive hair color.

“Ah, sorry… I feel pretty bad today.”

His voice came out in a rasp and Gudao might have frowned. It was hard to tell. “No kidding, you sound really ill.”

“Yeah… Woke up this way… I don't think I'll be able to deploy today… What about you? Why aren't you with the other Masters-?”

Scratching his head, Gudao chuckled sheepishly. “Stayed up a bit too late last night and dozed off during the debriefing, the director was pretty unimpressed.”

Ouch. He wasn't too surprised… 

Roman rushed back in, his arms holding a first aid kit. He pulled out a thermometer, and Kadoc let the man slip it inside. After a moment, it beeped and Roman cursed as he looked at the display. 

“Wow, that fever looks nasty… Yeah, bed rest for you for the next few days Kadoc. Nothing strenuous.”

Nothing strenuous like saving the world… There was a beeping noise from the intercom, before Lev’s voice came over.

“Romani, we are going to start the Rayshift soon. Have you seen Kadoc? He is the only member of A-Team missing.”

“Yeah, he's not Rayshifting anytime soon. Doctor’s orders.”

“I see. Could you come in case there's an emergency? The rest of A-Team’s in perfect condition, but B-Team is less experienced and are displaying slight abnormalities.”

Kadoc coughed as he heard Roman and Gudao chat some more, before the lights suddenly cut out.

What was-

A loud boom interrupted his thoughts, and Kadoc pulled his blanket closer as the alarms started to blare.

“What? An explosion?”

Roman cursed as the monitor showed that the Command Room was up in flames, before snapping out instructions. He ordered both Kadoc and Gudao to evacuate, before running out.

After a moment, Gudao ran off, the same way Roman went.

“Wait-! That's not-!” Kadoc trailed off, the rest of the words dying on his lips before he could tell Gudao he was going the wrong way. Though, he should know where the Command Room was if he came from there, right? He’s been here a while already…

He bit his lip. He couldn't worry about Gudao right now, hopefully the other man was running towards where Roman was. He would be safe there…

Kadoc stepped out of the hall and his lungs burned and his eyes watered from the smoke. He started coughing again, he needed to get out of here…

Turning down the opposite way, Kadoc moved as fast as he could towards the furthest point from the explosions so he wouldn't worsen his condition from smoke inhalation.

He wanted to help… But there wasn't anything he could do if he was this sick…


	54. Feature (Arthur)

Arthur took in where he had been summoned. The knowledge from the Throne of Heroes told him this was not a Grail War, but rather a conflict to save the world. He looked around, and saw a tanned Heroic Spirit with black hair standing on one side of the room with a jovial grin, as well as another with black hair and glasses with a scowl on his face.

“Servant Saber has arrived in accordance to your summons.”

“Sorry Gudao… seems like I couldn't even summon a Caster properly like I was supposed to…”

A human with short black hair, presumably this Gudao, was trying to comfort a human with… was that white hair? It was unusual for a human to have white hair back in his time unless they were very old or had mixed blood. Perhaps this human had mixed heritage?

“Hello Saber, my name is Gudao Fujimaru, what is yours?”

Arthur spent several moments, before deciding that if these people were his allies- yes he could feel the prana link between him and the two humans in front of him. Two Masters then?

“I am Arthur Pendragon, the King of Knights. A pleasure to make your acquaintance. I will protect you to the best of my ability.”

Gudao grinned, and let the other two Heroic Spirits introduce themselves. The archer was Arash, and the other apparently a demi-servant going by the name Lord El-Melloi the Second.

He looked towards the white haired Master, who still hadn't introduced himself. The master had his head dipped, and seemed to be grasping at something? Had magi replicated his Invisible Air?

The white haired master seemed to shrink in on himself as he realized that the entire room's attention was on him.

“I'm Kadoc Zemlupus… Hello…”

Arthur leaned forward to scrutinize the newly named Kadoc.

“Do you have non-human heritage in your lineage somewhere? White hair was unusual back in my time.”

Kadoc's head snapped up, and Arthur took the moment to study his other Master’s face. Amber eyes with dark bruises underneath them, with what his imparted knowledge told him were piercings, and… were those piercing in his neck as well? Those looked painful.

“Uh, no. Not that I know of…”

Arthur nodded, and stepped away, before turning to Gudao. “It will be a pleasure to fight alongside of you all.”

Gudao scratched his neck awkwardly. “Uh, first things first, how good are you with repairs? We still have a lot of repair work to do, we had a traitor and he caused quite a mess you see…”


	55. Want (Jekyll)

Jekyll looked over at the only Chaldean Master that was still awake. The one that was like him and “him”. Except they didn't make any effort to hide it. He could tell that some of the Servants and Gudao didn't believe that they were dual personalities but… Jekyll could tell.

He wanted to ask them how they could go around like that but… they looked so peaceful.

Both of their personalities reminded him of “him”. He heard they cut down the machines and homunculus without remorse, and while yes those weren't sentient beings…

He remembered how the other Servants gave them a wide berth, and why? Weren't they humans? A Servant shouldn’t have to worry about a human, physically.

He wasn't sure why but “he” was always so agitated around them.

They were like him and he wanted to know how they could coexist, and not constantly fight for dominance like him and “him”.

But… He wasn't sure how to approach them. Even though they looked peaceful now, earlier, there was a brief moment where Mordred said something and incandescent rage came across their face. It was only for a split second and only in their eyes but… he saw. It was a familiar expression, “he” had worn it frequently.

The comment that Mordred made seemed innocent enough so why? She had called them a liar when they said they weren't a magus. Then the moment of rage, before they commented that they were not magi, but magecraft users. Mordred scoffed and said they were the same. Their smile dipped and then… well.

He needed to think about how to approach them carefully so he wouldn't trip their temper… especially for someone who just did not seem to think the same way as others.

/////

Jekyll saw his moment early in the morning later that week. They turned politely to him, head tilted in silent inquiry.

“How… how do you get along despite sharing a body?”

They hummed quietly.

“We usually agree on things. We aren't that similar to you and the other you, who are out of sync more than not. We are in sync almost all the time, we are one but two at the same time.”

Jekyll frowned. “I don't think I understand.”

“You are constantly fighting the other “you”. That's not how it is for us. For us, we have separate thoughts but more often than not, our thoughts run as one. Sorry, we can't explain it any other way. You made the other you from a failed potion, but for us, as far as we can remember, we have always been this way. Maybe that's why we are different.”

Jekyll really didn't understand, but he could tell they were trying their best to explain it. But now he could tell that to them, trying to explain this was like asking him to explain why he existed. Something that couldn't be done easily. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to do more with Jekyll but my muse is like "NOPE :D"


	56. First (Kadoc)

Kadoc sighed as he unpacked his things. He just turned fifteen, and his family decided he was old enough to be sent away… He wasn't wanted and that hurt. After all, why would they need him, magically average second son? Why, why when they had his brother, who would inherit the family’s mage crest?

Kadoc looked up from unpacking his things to watch as the door to his room was opened and a dirty teenager about his age was shoved through the door, cursing in… was that French? It sounded like that from what he remembered from his family’s trip to France.

"Remember, you must stay here and keep the practice of magecraft a secret.” A voice sounded from outside the door.

The teen snarled. Oh no, was he really supposed to share a room with this person?

“If you run, remember, we can and will chase you down again.”

A sealing designation? Did this person that was his age have a sealing designation already? Why else would the Clock Tower chase them?

Urk. He was expected to room with a criminal?!

Without a word, the door shut, the other teen just glaring at the door and muttering something that sounded like a curse.

Making a low noise, the teen whirled around, before realizing that there was someone else in the room. And… Wow. Their eyes were pretty, one was gray and the other was blood red. It didn't clash as much as he would have expected them to.

Taking a deep breath, Kadoc decided he would at least try his best to get along with his new roommate. Even if they never became friends, he wanted them to not stab him in his sleep or something...

“Uh, hello… I'm Kadoc… Kadoc Zemlupus.”

The teen gave him a searching glare, before turning away. “Cen and Lucian.”

Wha, what kind of name was that? The accent sounded vaguely French.

“Isn't that two names? And no last name?” He prayed that the teen wouldn’t turn their explosive temper on him instead.

“Yes. Two names for two people. Doesn't that make sense? Last name? Like a family name or something? No.”

…Kadoc only saw one person but decided to nod anyway. Fine, if they were a bit touched in the head it wasn't his business, unless they were unstable enough to kill him when he wasn’t looking.

“You can call us Lucian if you want to. It's easier that way.”

Plural pronouns… Strange… Kadoc nodded, before looking at… Lucian. He looked around, noticing there wasn't a suitcase or anything with the teen.

“Do you have any things?”

Lucian shook their (he still wasn't sure of gender) head.

“No.”

…No things? Nothing at all? What kind of person had the Clock Tower dropped on him? He wanted to ask more about why Lucian was here but… the other teen still looked like they were ready to fight something.

Without a word, Lucian spun around before leaving the room.

Kadoc exhaled carefully as he heard the footsteps fade away, and returned to unpacking his things. Hopefully it would be okay…

/////

It had been over a week since Lucian had moved in, and yet still Kadoc was confused. He had never seen the other teen in anything but the uniform for the academy. He noticed that Lucian often sat on the backs of chairs with feet on the seat. And only wore shoes during classes. Even if Lucian was outside at other times, the shoes were left behind. 

After the first day, his roommate was cordial, even cheerful, but he remembered the thinly veiled anger. The rest of their class thought of Lucian as a weak magus, as his roommate never did any of the work assigned in class, rarely paid attention, and was poor at the practical applications as well.

It didn't make sense. How could they be that bad at magecraft if the Clock Tower was willing to expend resources to chase them down, even citing “not to expose the secret of magecraft?”

It was so confusing. Lucian did attempt to escape several times over the week, but each time the Association dragged them back. So why?

At the moment, said person of interest was sitting on the desk chair, the chair tilted back on two legs, and bare feet on the desk.

As they say, ‘curiosity killed the cat’, but he really couldn’t help himself… Kadoc took a deep breath, and turned to face Lucian from his spot on his bed.

“Lucian, can I ask you some questions?”

“Sure, we guess.”

“Why do you use plural pronouns for yourself? And what gender are you?”

Kadoc didn't want to presume that just because Lucian was a traditionally male name, that Lucian was automatically a guy. He hated having stuff assumed about him all the time, so the least he could do was not do the same.

“We told you this already. We are two people. Isn't the plural appropriate?”

Kadoc was even more confused. “I don't mean to offend, but I only see one person?”

Lucian hopped off the desk and brought a finger to one temple. “There are two people inside of here.”

“So, like two people in one body?”

Lucian made a pleased noise. “Yes, didn't realize there was a term for it though.”

Kadoc looked down. “And the other question?”

He got a shrug in response. “Does it matter? I guess you could use they. For convenience. We don’t care, unless you use ‘it’.” Their face darkened for a moment, before it passed. “Yeah, don’t do that. We’re fine with everything but that.”

Fingers unclenched from where the nails were digging into his palm. Okay. Easy enough. He didn’t want to get on their bad side at all.

“Next question, why do you always wear the school uniform?”

Lucian tilted his head at an angle so sharp his own neck gave a sympathetic twitch. “Don't have anything else to wear. Don't have money either. And we don't want to accept stuff we don't have to from the weirdos in charge here. These are enough, we don't need to steal any.”

Stealing? They were thieves too? He sucked in a breath.

“What kind of things do you steal?”

“Well, food mostly. Sometimes blankets and coats if it's really cold. Clothes sometimes when our old ones are about to fall apart.”

Letting out the breath, he relaxed slightly. Oh, so they were that kind of thief. He supposed that it was good they weren't just stealing anything unless they needed it…

“Don't you have a family?”

There was a frown, before Lucian contorted their body in a way that looked painful. “No. Only person we could consider family has been gone for years.”

...Oh. No wonder why they were stealing. If they were his age or so, and didn't have a family, did they have a choice if they wanted to live.

“How old are you? I'm fifteen, do you think you're older or younger than that?”

Lucian shrugged. “Dunno. Don't keep track. Maybe we are that age or so. It’s just a number, isn’t it?”

Another oddity.

“What about magecraft? Can you use that?”

He honestly was curious.

“Not by definition, no. We can do stuff, but it's not possible to recreate by mundane means. At least we haven't seen someone else do it. We aren't sure. What we can do doesn't neatly fit into the definition the professor gave on magecraft.”

Kadoc raised an eyebrow. “What do you understand the definition of magecraft to be?”

Lucian brought a hand to scratch the back of their head. “Uh, something about the artificial reenactment of a miracle using Mystery to create an end result that can be achieved by those who can't perform magecraft. Like, if you use a spell to light something on fire, someone who can't perform magecraft has to use a match instead.”

Wow, they really did listen to that lecture. It didn't seem like they were at the time. That or they already knew.

“What kind of stuff can you do then?”

“Watch.” Lucian hopped off the chair, before five crimson spheres seemed to come out of their fingers and orbited around them. They changed the shape several times, and shrugged. “We can use it as a weapon too. Mostly we manipulate the shape to do what we want.”

Lucian collected the spheres on their fingertip and they disappeared.

After a moment to consider what he had just seen, he spoke.“Looks like a variation on Professor Archibald’s Mystic Code. You use your magecraft casually like that?”

There was a whump, and Kadoc watched as Lucian seemed to be swallowed up by the bed.

“Mostly we use it for self-defense. Sometimes we do minor tasks with it to practice and determine new ways we can use it.”

It was a odd sort of logic, but it made sense. Somewhat.

“Thank you for answering my questions and being patient with me.”

“You're okay we guess. For a human. We don't mind your answering questions once in a while.”

…Yet another mystery to add to the general puzzle that was Lucian.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kadoc's backstory is not canon, I might rewrite this if we ever get a backstory for him. Come on Nasu ;A;
> 
> Also please correct me if I'm really wrong about the Nasuverse magic.


	57. Disdain (Kadoc)

After two or so months, Kadoc could say with almost certainty that Lucian would not stab him while he was sleeping. In fact, he thought some of his other classmates were more likely to do that instead… Despite the single flash of anger from his roommate, they normally remained cordial. It was better than the icy demeanors of most of the other students. Or at least more predictable and easier to work with.

His roommate came and went as they pleased- usually they left at night and didn't come back until morning. Kadoc didn't think he had ever seen him sleep in their bed, and their side of the room was still bare of anything resembling personal items.

Unless somehow toothpaste, a toothbrush, shampoo, and conditioner counted as personal items.

As far as he was aware, they had stopped trying to escape a month ago. He wondered what changed, but he didn't want to trigger their temper. They got along sort of, and Kadoc didn't want to break that fragile peace.

He heard a crash from down the hall, so he set down his book and slipped his head outside the door.

Someone was down the hall, and they seemed to have dropped a heavy box. “Uh, hello? Do you need help?”

The person paused, before nodding. “Sure, I guess. I'm Raphael Dubois, son of the Dubois family from France.”

Kadoc closed the door, and helped Raphael with his things. “I'm Kadoc Zemlupus, from the Baltics…”

Raphael raised an eyebrow. “The Zemlupus family? Wasn't their heir named something like Michael?”

“...Yes. Mykolas Zemlupus. I'm the second son…”

Raphael squinted. “Are you any good at magecraft?”

Eyes darting down to the floor, Kadoc didn't respond. No matter how hard he tried his magecraft was average, at best. He could only do a few projections and bounded fields… 

Raphael’s face turned to a grimace. “A bastard child then. I don't want your grimy hands on my stuff.”

Tears pricking at his eyes, he looked at the floor. For as long as he can remember, he always was called a bastard child, but lineage tests his father had performed on him said otherwise. But yet...

He set down Raphael’s things, and went back to his room and collapsed into tears. He just wanted someone not to care about his lineage and be his friend...


	58. Sharp (Cen and Lucian)

Cen and Lucian looked up as they heard raised voices around the corner. They skipped around to the sight, and frowned at what they saw.

That weird guy that moved down the hall about two months ago was yelling at Zemlupus. They thought he was okay, as far as humans went. He asked them questions, they answered, and he kept the knowledge of what they had said when he talked with them after. He didn't seem too bothered about how they spoke, which was another point in his favor.

The weird guy said something nasty in French, and they frowned. Zemlupus wasn't doing anything to retaliate, which they thought was a bit odd. Why wasn't he defending himself? They couldn't understand. If it were them, that guy would be a messy smear on the floor. At least before they hid the evidence.

As much as they loved a good fight they never would sink to the level of fighting someone that didn't fight back. Then they'd be no better than the bitch that made them this way.

They recalled that they often wished for someone to save them, before Assassin came. They pondered if they should intervene.

Sure, why not? They weren't close with Zemlupus, but he was alright, for a human. Much better than everyone else in this cesspit. That and they could punch in that human’s face. It wouldn’t be permanent, but still be satisfying. 

Honestly, if it wasn't for the threat of a sealing designation hanging over their heads, they would have skipped this place long ago. They had no desire to be chased to the ends of the Earth for the rest of their life. Sounded tiring, and just another form of containment.

Decision made, they stepped into view, a cruel smile on their lips.

“Really, we knew humans were scum, but picking on someone that won't fight back? And calling him a ‘freakish gay bastard’ in French as well?”

The other human reeled back. “Stay out of this, this is none of your business.”

Tsking, they inclined their head towards the door behind him. “Yeah it is, you're in front of our room.”

The human glared. “You are this bastard’s roommate?”

Their smile grew wider as the clapped sarcastically. “Oh, bravo, you do have a modicum of a brain in that thick head of yours. At first we thought you had the mental capacity of a wolf or something, but instead you have one of a primate.” They paused. “Oh that's to cruel of a comparison.” Another pause. “To the wolf and primate.”

Making an inarticulate sound of rage the human cast a spell, which they weaved around. “Ooh, playtime~”

The fight, if it could even be called that, was swift. The magus went down like a sack of rice as their fist impacted his face. They huffed. “Not even a good warmup…”

They turned around, and noticed Zemlupus still seemed petrified in front of the door.

“Mou, you should probably go inside before he wakes.”

Zemlupus gulped, it looked like he was gathering his courage. “You don't care? About what he said?”

“Should we? Sounds like a strange thing to care about. Why should we let the words of someone that’s pathetic enough they have to be cruel to someone that doesn’t fight back matter to us?”

Zemlupus exhaled slowly and stood up, beckoning them inside. “...Thanks. Usually people… don't like it.”

A shrug, and they followed him in and shut the door. “Seems pointless to care about, if you ask us.”

Zemlupus paused before speaking once more. “Why did you save me?”

“Eh, it isn’t obvious? We like you, you aren't like the rest of these human scumbags. Also, we _ really _ dislike when other people are cruel to those that don't fight back.” Then, they grinned. “Also, we  _ loathe  _ people like that, so punching him in the face was satisfying.”

Zemlupus seemed torn as to whether to be grateful or creeped out. After a moment, he settled on grateful. “Thanks…”


	59. Debt (Kadoc)

It had been a week since Lucian defended him from Raphael, and he noticed they were spending more time in the room. Sometimes they poked their head over and and commented on his homework. Once, he asked why they didn't do any of theirs.

“Trying to figure out if they want to keep us here more than they want us to uphold the reputation of this place.”

Ah, they still wanted to leave. That was alright.

Stretching his back, he turned his chair towards Lucian. He finished his homework for the week and he was… curious if Lucian wanted to hang out with him or something.

He wouldn't have asked before but, since their relationship got better, well, maybe? They probably would let him know politely if they didn't want to. Or at least not punch him in the face. Maybe. Possibly. Probably.

“Hey Lucian, are you doing anything this weekend?”

Lucian made a noise that sounded like a chirp. “Just the usual stuff, why?”

“The usual stuff? I was wondering if you wanted to go do something in the town.”

They tilted their head. “Well, we enjoy walking around the streets, and being high up. Sometimes we walk on top of the fences and such. We watched a concert in the local park once, it was pretty, lots of light.”

“A, A what? A concert?” Kadoc had no idea what that was.

“People play music for others there! It's really cool. In our opinion, magi don't pay attention to the world of those without magecraft enough. They're ignoring a large part of the world due to their pride!”

Could non-magi really have things comparable to magical devices?

He recalled his parents saying that anything non-magi made were wastes of time but… well… The way his parents acted wasn't right for him, so maybe it would be worth trying this as well?

“Could you show me sometime? I just know about shops and stuff… Actually, I was wondering if you wanted to go shopping with me? I wanted to look for some more books.”

Lucian grinned. “Sure! Now?”

Kadoc nodded. “Yeah, by the way, put your shoes on and keep them on your feet while we are out, otherwise people will look at you weird…”

Slipping his own feet into his shoes, Kadoc heard Lucian speak up. “Eh? Is that why people look at us weird whenever we go out for a walk?”

…Were they really going outside all this time without shoes…? Considering what little he knew of them, most likely.

“Yes. Shoes protect your feet, so people usually wear them. Usually people associate lacking shoes with being poor.”

Lucian nodded to themself. “Oh, okay. We can protect our feet without shoes though, and we are poor- the Association gives us supplies and stuff.”

Kadoc paused in the middle of pulling on his coat. “I don't mind telling you what most people do, if you want?”

He winced. That came out wrong. Opening his mouth to take that back, Lucian interrupted him. “Okay, as long as you're fine with the fact we may or may not actually do it.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, he nodded. That was fair, and also a better outcome than he expected. Especially from someone who may or may not have taken those words poorly. He finished buttoning up his coat and turned to look at Lucian.

“Ready to go?”

When Lucian nodded, Kadoc opened the door to the room and let them exit before he locked it. He let his feet carry him to the nearest bookstore, his roommate close behind.

/////

Kadoc looked around, three new books tucked under his arm. Where was Lucian?

He started to look around the isles, and found Lucian tucked in a corner reading a well worn book. He looked at the title, and it wasn't in English.

As Kadoc watched, Lucian changed his position in the chair, and caressed the spine of the book tenderly.

“Can you read that?” Lucian nodded in response to Kadoc's question.

“Well, I'm ready to go, do you want me to buy it for you?”

Their fingers paused in the middle of turning a page. “We don't have money though… we couldn't pay you back…”

“I don't mind. You seem to really like it. Can I ask what it’s about?”

Lucian closed the book and stroked the spine like a beloved pet. “It's a book of French folklore and fairytales from the 18th century. Our brother told us a lot of these before he left…”

The wistful smile on their face made Kadoc’s chest ache. It seemed his roommate was remembering times gone by... Even if his own brother never did that for him, he could understand that their brother, whoever he was, was important to them. He placed his own books on the table, and looked at the price for the book. Oh, that's not too bad.

“I don't mind buying this for you if you really want it. If you really want to pay me back, you could perform errands for money, maybe? People tend to put out ads for help sometimes. Nothing stolen please.”

Making a pleased noise, they nodded. “Nothing stolen as repayment. We promise.”

Gathering up his books, Kadoc walked towards the counter, Lucian several steps behind.

The cashier looked at the book Lucian was interested in, and raised an eyebrow at them.

“Kid, you can read this? This is Classical French.”

“Yes? It's how we were taught…?” They seemed confused.

Interesting. Kadoc didn't know there was a difference from modern French. Apparently neither did they. Seemed to be a noticeable one too. 

Without another word, the cashier finished ringing up the books and placed them in a bag as Kadoc paid.

“Thank you.” Taking the bag, he waved goodbye to the cashier.

Once they were outside, Kadoc spoke up. “I didn't know you knew Classical French.”

“We didn't know either, it's just French to us… Though, there's a lot you don't know about us.”

That's true. But he wasn't going to pry. He would take note of the offended comments they made about their life, unless they wanted to share more than that.

“Zemlupus- Kadoc.”

Kadoc turned to face Lucian when they spoke his first name. As far as he was aware, Lucian didn't use first names for anyone, ever. He wondered if it was a gesture of trust. “Yes?”

“Thanks a lot, for today we mean.”

With a smile, Kadoc offered the bag to Lucian, who took it. “You're welcome. We can hang out more if you want, alright?”

Chuckling, Lucian did a small twirl on the spot. “Okay! We’ll be in your debt until we pay you back, don't forget~”

“I won't, but take as long as you need For it, don't stress yourself out over it too much!”

“Okay… okay… got it~!”


	60. Kneel (Kadoc)

After that day a few months ago when they went to the bookstore together they wound up hanging out more and more often. Non-magi really were innovative with what they had. Aside from the book that they read frequently, they didn't get anything else. They did manage to pay him back about a month later.

Now, Kadoc could say with certainty Lucian was kinder to him than his own blood family, and considering the teen’s manner could at best, be described as friendly, but distant, that was… well, it said things about how his family treated him, and none if it good. He would take friendly but distant over cold and distant any day.

Unlocking the door to his dorm room after a long study session at the library, Kadoc paused as he saw Lucian sleeping on their bed.

Thinking back, he couldn't remember seeing them sleeping once. Maybe they just slept somewhere else? He wondered why that changed.

Kadoc set his bag next to his desk, and sighed. He still wasn't any closer to becoming better at magecraft. Lucian’s advice of “try new things, the old things aren't working for you” was well meant but…

He still couldn't cast a basic illusion spell, not even the simple ones from class, and it was almost nine months since he was sent here, and the Clock Tower was about to send their students home for the summer. His parents would be so disappointed...

Going home to his family after living with someone who accepted him in their own way was… unappealing.

A low moan interrupted his musings, and he looked around. His eyes fell on Lucian’s form, and the other teen was shivering and whimpering.

Walking over, Kadoc frowned and put a hand on their shoulder gently shaking them to try and wake them up. “Lucian? You should wake up, you're having a nightmare…”

Lucian didn't react, it's as if they didn't realize he was trying to wake them at all. Suddenly, his roommate let out a pained screech, before the writhing intensified to the point Lucian was thrashing in bed… 

Oh no, what was he supposed to do-?!

Gripping both of their shoulders, Kadoc shook them and tried to wake them up.

“Lucian! Lucian you have to wake up, please!”

Stiffening, Lucian’s thrashing stopped, and their breath was coming in heavy pants. After a pause, Kadoc heard the sound of fabric ripping, before tendrils shot towards him.

Yelping, Kadoc ducked as the tendrils…  splashed against the opposite wall? He watched as the tendrils slid down the wall like liquid. What…?

Movement caught the corner of his eye, and he turned to see Lucian sitting up in bed, and he could hear them hyperventilating. They seemed to be looking at a point above his head, were they still unconscious?

“We said to  _ leave us alone! _ Haven't you hurt us  _ enough _ ?!”

Kadoc had no idea what was happening, but Lucian was suffering… The idea of the one person that sort-of cared for him suffering made something unpleasant curl in his stomach.

Gathering his courage, he stepped towards them. Yes… up close, he could tell they weren't aware from their eyes were unfocused.

“ _ No!  _ We won't let you trap us again-!”

Biting his lip, Kadoc decided what he was about to do next would be very stupid and likely get him killed. But it’s not like he had any other ideas.

He crept towards Lucian, and once he was close enough, he sank to his knees and, mindful of their previous statement, enveloped them in a loose hug they could easily break if they needed to.

Freezing, Lucian stared straight ahead. Kadoc dipped his head so his lips were next to their ear.

“I don't know what you're seeing right now, but it's not real. It's all in your head, it's not happening. You are in the Clock Tower in one of the student dormitories. No one is hurting you, you're safe.”

Kadoc continues to repeat the whispered assurances, until Lucian returned the loose embrace.

“…Kadoc?”

“I'm here. It's okay. You had a bad nightmare. It's over now.”

“…No. That was a tame one. Usually we have worse. And it will just happen again next time we try to sleep…”

That was terrifying. Kadoc pulled away so he could look into Lucian’s eyes. Defeat. Resignation.

“…Do you want to tell me more? I want to help you…” Remembering their dislike for debts, he added, “If you must, consider it repayment. You've helped me a lot since we met, let me return the favor, please.”

After a long moment, Kadoc felt Lucian nod.

“We suffer from screaming nightmares every time we dream. We are masters at sleeping in snatches of 30 minutes throughout the day. But that only delays the inevitable. Once every two or three days we can't subsist on those naps anymore and we fall into dreams… Usually we find a secluded spot and set up a bounded field to block the noise but… This time we misjudged our sleep…”

That did not sound healthy at all… How did they not have eye bags? Were they hiding them? Well, that wasn't as important right now.

“Do you always react like that when someone tries to wake you?”

Lucian nodded. “Yes, sorry. We can't help it…”

“It's alright. You can't help it, as you said.”

How could he help them? … Ah. He felt his cheeks warm as he came up with an idea. What seemed to snap them out of it was a gentle touch so…

“…Want to sleep together? You seemed to react better when I gave you a loose hug.”

Looking down, Lucian sighed. “Maybe. Sometimes our brother did that, and the nightmares didn't come but we don't know.”

“It's worth a try, right? Let me just change and get ready for bed.”

Kadoc broke the hug and stood up. Part of him questioned why he was willing to go so far to help his roommate sleep soundly but… another part pointed out that Lucian sort-of cared about him and shouldn’t he be kind to them in return? Also… that scream sounded so pained… He would feel awful if he didn't do everything he could to make it better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lucian is an actual manchild. Or the gender neutral equivalent of manchild. Adult-child? IDK.


	61. Morning, Worry (Kadoc)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Morning takes place a few hours after 'Kneel'.
> 
> I was going to put these in two separate chapters but I was like "...these are tiny." So I just put them together.

Kadoc groaned as the sunlight shone through the window. He turned over and paused as he met resistance. He looked down, and saw Lucian sleeping peacefully.

What…? Oh, that's right. Kadoc suggested that they sleep together in an effort to alleviate Lucian’s nightmares. It seemed to work, considering he was still in one piece.

With a yawn, Lucian blinked open their eyes before sitting up and stretching.

“Did you sleep well Lucian?”

Lucian hummed. “Yes, thank you Kadoc. It was the most restful sleep we have had in three years.”

…Kadoc couldn't stand even hearing it for three minutes, experiencing it for three years? He couldn't comprehend it.

“Good. We can do that every night if necessary.”

Lucian paused, before seeming to deflate. “But aren't you going home to your family soon for the summer? We know we are staying here but…”

Oh right, that. He forgot. “...We can do that every night I'm here then.”

Lucian tilted their head at him. “It doesn't bother you?”

Kadoc shook his head. “Not really. I just want to help you.”

Lucian gave him one of those looks that seemed to pierce right down to his soul. Kadoc suppressed the urge to shiver, something about that look gave him the creeps. “Okay.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, Kadoc smiled. He didn't want to see them suffer like that if he could help it. _Worthless second son…_ His father’s voice whispered in his mind, but he shook it away.

No. He wasn't worthless, Lucian needed him.

/////

Sighing, Kadoc looked out the window of his room in the family mansion at the snow. When he got back, his family immediately asked if he could use magecraft yet. When he told them he still couldn't cast an illusion, they recoiled in disgust. To his family, a magus that couldn't cast an illusion was just a faker… 

Closing his eyes, he thought of Lucian. Were they doing alright? Were they sleeping okay? He hoped so.

God, he missed them. Especially since his family acted so distant towards him, he realized that at some point, Lucian had dropped their distant attitude towards him. Maybe because they divulged something incredibly personal to him…

He wished he didn't have to be worried to perform magecraft… He hated it. To make it worse, he had to stay worried in order for his circuits to remain activated.

He tried to cast a basic illusion spell, and sighed as just like every other time, nothing happened.

Maybe Lucian was right, and he should stop trying to cast illusions. It worried him, that he had the potential but had no idea what his circuits were best at… he was already a disgrace to most magi… but he really wanted to get better, he just didn't know how…


	62. Advice (Kadoc)

Kadoc pushed the door open to his dorm room. Summer break had just ended, and his father had disowned him in all but name…

_ “You are a disgrace to this family Kadoc! Don't come back until you can at least perform a basic illusion!” _

After so long of trying, he was forced to admit he may never be able to cast an illusion. It stung. Even if his family wasn't loving, they were still his blood family…

He was briefly distracted from his depressing thoughts as he noticed Lucian had acquired a few more items for their side of the room over break, seemingly textbooks. Lucian waved at him, and then paused.

“Kadoc? You feel upset…”

Placing his suitcases with all of his important things down on the bed, he nodded. “Yeah… my family basically disowned me over the summer… They don't want a son that can't do the family trade of weaving illusions…”

Arms loosely hugged him from behind. “Ah. It was the same for us. We never met the father who birthed us, and our blood mother hated us so.”

Making a confused noise in the back of his throat, Kadoc tilted his head back to look at Lucian. “Are they dead?”

Lucian huffed. “As for dear old dad, probably. Last we saw of her, that bitch was still alive.”

Kadoc was still pretty confused. “I thought you said you had no family.”

“That bitch? She didn't want us so why should we want her? She's no family of ours, the only family that matters to us is our brother, and he's not related to us by blood.”

Lucian pulled away and wandered over to balance on the back of Kadoc’s desk chair. “You can either let this keep you down or you can rise above it. It will be hard, but all you can do is try your best Kadoc. This isn't the end of the world unless you make it so.”

Kadoc nodded. “Yeah, okay… I'll try. Thanks for the words of encouragement.”

Tilting their head, Lucian blinked. “If you wish to take the truth that way.”

Snorting, Kadoc turned back to unpack his things. “You could have delivered it in a more abrasive manner, and I needed to hear it. Thanks. Are you still going to try and leave?”

Shrugging, Lucian tilted the chair back on two legs. “Probably not. We don’t have anywhere else to go, and since they care more about keeping us here than us getting any sort of good grades, it’s not too bad, especially since they’re still under the impression we’re a menace to society. Not to mention we have a warm place to sleep and such. It’s better than being on the streets. Even though it’s technically a prison, it’s comfy enough and we have enough freedom we might as well stick around. Your company is enjoyable too.”

That was good. Kadoc was afraid they’d actually still want to leave since he wasn’t here for three months… But knowing they were here to stay was a huge relief.

“Though, can you get off my chair? You have your own.”

Cackling, Lucian shook their head. “Nope!”

Shaking his head, Kadoc chuckled. While he was worried about what would happen now, he would follow Lucian’s advice. He would try his best not to make this event the end of the world.

It was good advice.


	63. Sacrifice (Cen and Lucian)

Kadoc was interesting. Even though he knew more about them than anyone else alive, he still wished to associate with them. Even when they were deliberately being creepy, just to see if that would be the pushing point that made him freak out.

Perhaps they would introduce him properly to “them”. Yes, that seemed like a good idea.

They thought the almost murder when he woke them up would be the point where Kadoc had enough, but to their surprise, it wasn't. He even offered a solution that let them have the first restful sleep they have had in years? Why did he care so much? They didn't understand it. It was strange and different. Aside from Assassin, no one else bothered. Do humans like that really exist?

Sometimes he mentioned in passing about how weak he was, and how much of a loser he was, but they didn't think so. Even after showing more of themselves to him than they did to anyone else, he still willingly associated with them. Other, lesser humans had shied away after they had seen them be themself at various points, but Kadoc did not. No, he was not weak, regardless of what he thought about himself. At least they thought so. A weak human would have been running for the hills the first time they tilted their head until the bones started to creak.

As much as they thought he was alright for a human, if he couldn't accept them completely then there would be no point in developing this… whatever it was. Even if so far he had exceeded their expectations. Getting their hopes up about it was a pointless endeavor. That was just asking for hope to be destroyed. They refused to be caged by the whims of society, so they would act however they pleased. If that meant no one accepted them, so be it. They still had each other.

They think they would be sad if that happened, if he finally had enough, but they aren't that sure. No one else got this close to them before, so would the theoretical parting hurt?

Maybe. Maybe they would just be disappointed that he was so close to accepting everything that they are and will be? It's hard to predict. Losing Assassin hurt, it ached down to their bones, but he was different than Kadoc. Kadoc doesn't have a direct link to their innermost thoughts and darkest desires, Kadoc didn't raise them and teach them necessary things. They weren't as attached.

…They say they aren't attached but when some of the other magi spit insults at him and promise to hurt him, they defend him. At first, they figured it was just because they disliked when people picked on people that didn't fight back. Maybe it was. But now they're even defending him when he's not around to hear it. Why? Why are they doing that? They don't know. It's weird. They don't understand. But it feels… right? That word sounds weird and ill fitting. But it is the best fit for what they feel. 

But they digress. Acting like a human wasn't necessary, in their opinion. They weren't human, the bitch made that quite clear, so why should they have to act like one? The only reason they did some of the things Kadoc suggested was because they wanted to or it made sense. Even a stopped clock is still right at least once a day. They would always take good advice no matter where it came from. Letting pride get in the way of something useful was pointless. That sort of thing could get them killed.

No. They just wanted to live.


	64. Terms (Kadoc)

Kadoc blinked as Lucian walked into their room, the door clicking shut behind them. The hair rose on the back of his neck, and he examined his… friend. Yes, after nearly two years he would like to think they were friends.

But… Lucian’s eyes were both gray. Why wasn't one of them red like always?

“Lucian? Are you alright?”

Their head snapped around and… how was that possible? They just turned their head 180 degrees, and it didn't seem to bother them at all… something about it made a chill run down his spine.

“Ah. Kadoc. You and I have not formally met as of yet. My name is Cen.”

Cen. Remembering back to when Lucian introduced themself, they did so as “Cen and Lucian” before saying Kadoc could just call them Lucian.

He wasn't sure how true their story about there being two people in one body was, but… it was definitely more believable than before. The feeling he got from Lucian was completely different than the person in front of him right now.

For one, Lucian may have been kind of unusual but they didn't set off his fight or flight instinct aside from that first day… For another, Cen’s face was a perfect mask, yet he could still feel irritation rolling off of them in waves.

Deciding to be honest, he exhaled sharply. “I didn't believe Lucian when they said you were two people in one body.

“It is irrelevant if you did or did not. We are both one person, yet two at the same time. We have always been this way, and will always be.” Cen said simply. 

That sounded confusing… “Can you elaborate? Please? I want to try my best to understand.”

After a moment, Cen twisted their body so they were facing him. Kadoc resisted the urge to wince at the sickening crack that action made.

Noticing his discomfort, Cen commented. “I will not be offended if you find me creepy.”

Ah, he must not have done a good job hiding the discomfort… “No, it's alright. I'd like to think I'm your friend, if you would let me. Even if I find it uncomfortable, you aren't actually hurting me by doing it. You aren't hurting yourself doing it either, are you?”

“Friend…” Cen murmured after a pause, rolling the word on their tongue. “Perhaps we are. You, me, and Lucian. No one else aside from our brother had cared before if we hurt ourself or not. And no. It does not hurt.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, Kadoc smiled. “That makes me glad to hear. Both about us being friends and that moving like that doesn't hurt. Though… you seem… irritated? Did something happen?”

Cen’s neck made an aborted twitch. “Yes. It relates to what you asked before. We were one singular entity once. In some ways, we still are. We have encountered pain that could not be borne by one consciousness, so the entity that became us split into both Lucian and myself. Or that person made us split in two. We aren’t sure which of the two is accurate. Maybe both. Maybe neither. Who we were before is irrelevant. Which brings me to the subject of my… immense displeasure.”

Kadoc felt a chill go down his spine, but waited for Cen to finish speaking. After a long moment, they continued.

“Yes… one of those…  _ humans _ had said that we were a, hmm, a “weak bitch that would not survive one minute in the real world.” Please, if anything, that describes the scum that said that more than us…”

…If what Cen said was true about them and Lucian splitting from one soul due to pain, then that was… well, he didn't want to think about it.

“I don't think you're weak.” Kadoc murmured. How could he? They weathered those nightmares for years after all…

Blinking slowly, Cen turned around as the instinctual feeling he was one step away from being eaten faded away.

“Though, I have one more question. Where is Lucian?”

Craning their neck back at him, they hummed.

“Ah. “They” are currently in time out in our head, “they” will be back shortly enough…”


	65. Freeze (Kadoc)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does this count as graphic depictions of violence? Well, it's more violent than the other parts, so watch out for that.

Trying to slow the flow of blood with magecraft, Kadoc wheezed as he clutched at his chest and stared at his attacker. He had no idea who it was and why he was targeting him, but he didn't want to die here.

It didn't matter how he got the assailant to stop, he just wanted it to stop-!

_ Please, just wither away slowly! Erode away until you can't hurt me anymore! _

The thought came from the dark corner of his mind, and his circuits hummed as that thought was translated into reality.

His assailant froze, before dropping his weapon and clawing at his neck. The blood drained from his face as he watched the assailant’s fingers blacken with frostbite despite it being a warm summer night, before crumbling to dust.

“Y-You-! What have you done-!” The assailant rasped out. 

That was his doing? How? It was much stronger than any of his other magecraft… If it was his doing, he had no idea how to stop it.

Terrified, he could only watch as his assailant turned to dust and gore before his eyes. His stomach heaved, before he vomited what was left his dinner onto the sidewalk. No, no-!

Stumbling out of the alley, Kadoc pitched forward, before hands reached out to catch him. His vision swam, before darkness enveloped him.

/////

Kadoc shot awake. That nightmare… All he could see was a human being crumbling before his eyes… The raw terror as the man realized what was happening to him… He wrapped his arms around his chest, and gasped loudly.

The blankets next to him rustled, before Lucian sat up and blinked sleep out of their eyes, before turning to look at him.

“You had a nightmare.”

It wasn't a question, but Kadoc nodded anyway. “I dreamed of the man that attacked me turning to dust before my eyes and… oh God-!”

“That was you? Who did that?”

Tears dripped down his face as he remembered the sight. “I don't know how-! I just wanted him to stop attacking me-! I didn't want that to happen-!”

There was a pause, before Lucian loosely circled their arms around him. He hiccuped, and turned to bury his now damp face into their chest.

“It's not your fault… He would have killed you. It looked like a curse was laid on him…”

Clinging further to Lucian, he bit his lip. A curse, how? How was that possible? His family never had aptitude for curses…  _ But _ a small voice spoke up in his mind.  _ But you have no ability in their illusions. _

Hands cupped his cheek and Lucian tilted his face upward, before wiping away his tears with a thumb. “You need to learn more about your ability with curses.”

No-! Why-! Shaking his head, Kadoc gripped Lucian’s arms tighter. He didn't want to learn more about it-! The Clock Tower didn't teach curses for a reason-!

“Kadoc. Look at us.” Their finger tilted his chin upward. “You need to learn because we can see this is tearing you up inside. From what you told us, you did that by accident. If you don't learn about this ability, it could happen again. The only way to make sure it doesn't is to learn about it, and control it. Change your way of thinking if you have to.”

Ah… as much as he hated to admit it, they had several good points… He reluctantly nodded.

“But… the Tower doesn't teach us curses here…”

Clicking their tongue, Lucian huffed. “That's true. We might have to do it carefully. Start off with things like rocks and twigs.”

“...You, you'll help me?” His voice came out in a pained whisper.

Caressing his cheek, Lucian nodded. “We will. But for now, sleep. Don't worry, we’re here.”

Fingers curling in their shirt, Kadoc pulled them down so they were right next to him. He was scared, scared of this new ability. But his instincts told him that Lucian was probably right. If he didn't learn about it, it could happen again, and that made him even more terrified.

He didn't want that to happen again… He didn't want to be responsible for another murder… 


	66. Study (Kadoc)

Exhaling slowly, Kadoc tried to focus on what he wanted to happen. According to the book Lucian got from somewhere (he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know where, so he didn’t ask), curses were manifestations of pain and disintegration. They happened over time, and not instantly. What he did to that man last week was a basic form of a curse… If that was a basic curse, how much worse could it get?

A hand curled over his own, and he looked up, startled. Lucian hummed. “You were losing focus, try again.”

Gripping the stone until his knuckles turned white, he glared at Lucian. “Of course I was! If you haven't forgotten, I  _ killed _ a man two days ago-!” His voice cracked on the last word, and he hiccuped. 

“We know. The fact it still bothers you means you're kind, not like us. But you should grasp that feeling and turn it into motivation. Instead of thinking ‘I can't do this, this man is dead because of this power!’ instead think ‘Because this man is dead, I need to control it so it doesn't happen again.’ That is what we meant by changing your way of thinking.”

Looking down at the rock, Kadoc sighed. “It sounds like self-hypnosis… I just can't do it…”

Shrugging, Lucian stepped back. “Honestly, we never do that. We never need to. Maybe it is because our way of thinking is already optimized to controlling our circuits.”

Biting his lip, Kadoc sighed, before handing the rock to Lucian. “I want to see an example, please…”

Tilting their head, Lucian closed his eyes, and hummed. As Kadoc watched, the stone changed shape. “In order to do this, we had to view the rock as having ‘lifeblood’ that makes this rock different from other rocks. We then could manipulate the ‘lifeblood’ of it to make it change shape.”

Opening their eyes, they placed the rock back in his hands. “We don't expect you to get it immediately, just try your best.”

Nodding to show he understood, he tried to recall what he had thought right before it happened.

Yes, he wanted the man to wither away, and erode until he couldn't hurt him anymore.

Channeling his worry, he opened his circuits. Focusing on the rock, he repeated the thought. But nothing happened.

“What did you think of? The exact words, please.”

Repeating the words he thought aloud, Lucian tapped their finger to their chin. “Perhaps it didn't work because the rock isn't a threat to you right now?”

It was worth a try. He looked at the rock again, and took a deep breath.

_ Erode away until you are nothing but the Earth from whence you came. _

This time, something happened, the rock crumbling before his eyes, until it was dust. He exhaled slowly.

“Good, now you should try to learn how to break a curse.”

Huh? He didn't read anything about that. The book seemed to imply once a curse took hold there was no way to stop it without it running out of prana. It was the sole reason curses were so feared…. Catching the look on his face, Lucian elaborated.

“We thought you could lay a curse on another curse, if you will. Like causing the curse to disintegrate… Or cause the prana supply of the curse to wither up and stop it like that…”

…That sounded complicated. But also really helpful. Even if was difficult, he would try it.

“I think I'm going to need more stones to practice with.”

Grinning, Lucian pulled out a pail of rocks from the closet. “That's the spirit! Try your best!”

Yes, he would try his best to learn everything he could about curses. He didn't want something like before to happen again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea how curses in Nasuverse are supposed to work, so I made something up. If something seems wrong about it, like blatantly going against canon, hit me up and I'll edit this.


	67. Miss (Cen and Lucian)

Snarling under their breath, Cen and Lucian cursed the Clock Tower. They would want nothing more than to let this cursed Grail War pass by, but they were unfortunate enough to have the command seals appear in class. Fucking asshole professor dragged them to the head of the Clock Tower, and they were given an ultimatum. Win in the Holy Grail War and give them the Holy Grail or they would harm Kadoc. Tch. They didn't regret becoming fond of him over the last five years, but like hell they would drag him into their problems. 

Fine. They would participate in this farce. They would give those vultures the Holy Grail as long as Kadoc was kept out of the Clock Tower’s power plays.

Deal made, they stormed out of the office. Apparently this farce would start in two days.

At least they managed to successfully finish that little project last week, they would probably need it.

Kadoc looked up, startled. “Lucian…?”

Deep breath. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. Taking out their anger on him would be pointless.

“Kadoc. We have to go somewhere for a month or so. We have to leave now.”

They flinched as Kadoc suddenly hugged them tightly, burying his face into their shoulder. “Please… both of you, come back safely…”

“We lived this long, we don't plan on doing anything else.”

Letting go, Kadoc looked to the side. “Do you want me to help you pack-?”

They shook their head. “We aren't planning on bringing much.”

Putting the book of fairytales, a few changes of clothes and money into a bag, they nodded. It only took a few minutes. Looking over their shoulder before they left, they gave him some parting words. They didn't plan on saying goodbye, they weren't going to die.

“Take care while we’re gone Kadoc, we’re fond of you, and we didn't think we could be fond of anyone.”

Yes. They would kill and kill and kill again to ensure their own survival, then come back. Shutting the door, they took a deep breath. They had a War to win.


	68. Withdraw (Cen and Lucian, Gilgamesh)

Fucking Holy Grail Wars. Thank fuck it was finally over. Unlocking the door to their dorm room, they pushed it open, and stared. Kadoc’s half of the room was stripped bare, except for a piece of paper on the desk.

Eyes roving over the paper, they took the message in. “ _ Taken. Chaldea Security Organization. I miss you. See you soon… _ ”

Hissing, they whirled around while folding up the paper and slipping it into their pocket.

“We think, that we need to pay them a visit.”

Archer scoffed from behind them. “You aren't going to go through with your foolish idea of handing them my grail now, are you?”

Tilting their head back, they gave Archer a sharp smile. “Of course not. But Archer, may we be permitted to wish upon it? We know we said we weren't interested in it before, but… plans change.”

Raising an eyebrow, Archer crossed his arms. “What are you planning?”

“Wouldn't it be unfortunate, if they were so close to getting what they wanted, only to have it snatched from underneath their feet?”

Letting out a booming laugh, Archer smirked. “Even now, you continue to amuse me. Very well, I, the king, shall permit it!”

“Let us just pack the rest of our stuff, we aren't planning on staying here anymore. We are going to look for him.”

/////

Gilgamesh trailed behind his vassal. Yes, oathbreakers deserved judgment. On the way, his vassal requested that they be allowed to carry out the sentence. He would permit it.

His vassal had calmed down since they left the room, but only on the surface. The rage was tightly contained, he could feel it through the link.

The door opened into a quaint room. Gilgamesh scoffed. As if any room could match the splendor of his palace in Uruk. Moving around, Gilgamesh moved so he could see his vassal’s face. The show was about to begin.

“Lucian, do you have the grail?”

An insincere smile curled on his vassal’s face. “Yes. We held up our part of the deal.” They paused, their eyes sharpened, their grin split wider, and the room grew colder. Gilgamesh could feel the prana rising in the air.

“Unlike you, it seems.”

The person behind the desk scoffed. “If you wanted him safe, you should have gotten it in a written contract.”

Disgusting. These magi used someone else to force his vassal to bend to their will. They would find out his vassal was not that easy to control.

With a mental request for the grail, Archer obliged, dropping it into their outstretched palm.

“Funny. We were about to say the same thing. Holy Grail, heed our words. As the victor of the Holy Grail War, we wish to be able to be reunited with those people again.”

The wish granted, the grail dissipated into motes of prana.

The magus mongrel behind the desk leapt at his vassal, and they neatly sidestepped.

“You complete and utter fool! We could have reached Akasha, but you ruined it-!”

“We are selfish, just like you.” Their gaze narrowed.

_ “Oathbreakers and those of sharing the blood of your ideals, slowly wither away until there is nothing left of you! May your mind erode away, without blood to feed it! May your body wither to ash, without blood to sustain it! May your soul flake away, without the lifeblood of the mind or body that composes it! Have good fortune come to you, only for it to be drained away like blood from a fresh wound before you can grasp it! May this curse settle into your blood, where it feeds off your prana and the only escape is death!” _

Impressive. He could feel the intent behind the curse, twisted in a form their magic circuits would accept. It was so powerful, he felt it skitter across his skin, drawing from his prana before leaping to its intended target.

_ “Archer, we’re done here.” _ The muttered, before storming out of the office. Casting one last glance behind him, Gilgamesh followed.

_ “Oh? What did that curse mean to do? I, the king, felt it from here.” _

_ “Tch. Made it so their sanity would evaporate, before their body follows. Also made it so they would never have good luck again. Also made it so it would be hard, if not downright impossible to remove. Only way the curse would stop is if they abandoned their goal of Akasha, and even then it would lay dormant.” _

_ “Fascinating, I, the king, haven't seen a curse like that before. Sounds like that would wipe out most magi.” _

_ “Yeah, our circuits only work if the magecraft involves blood in some way. We have to get creative. It would, if we had enough power for it. We focused all our prana into laying it on those in the room. It would only jump to someone else if they adopted the same goal and methods as someone that we initially laid the curse on. Ugh, though we need to recharge our prana now…” _

Gilgamesh nodded. It was a well crafted curse. Yes, he chose his vassal well. He would enjoy watching what they decided to do.


	69. Quiet (Kadoc)

Humming quietly so he didn’t disturb the other occupants of the Salon, he looked over at his phone, before sketching in another detail based on the photo. Hm, he should be ready to color it soon, just a few more details. It was a drawing of the ocean in the morning, framed by trees, so most of the work would be in the coloring.

Satisfied with his lines, he pulled out the markers and got to work- oh?

Pulling off his headphones and pausing the music, he smiled at Jackie. Even though she was Jack the Ripper, beneath all of that was a girl that just wanted the love of a mother, and he could understand that. His own parents didn’t care very much for him at all. He was glad to hear that Atalanta had taken her and Nursery Rhyme, who went by Alice now, in.

“Hi! What are you doing today?” The girl leaned over the table to peer at his work.

Obligingly, he turned the sketchpad around so she could see it. “Oh-! That’s from the wharf at the beach, isn’t it!”

“Yep! I’m going to start coloring it in now, do you want to watch?” He offered. Jackie nodded, before sliding in his side of the booth. He picked up a light blue, and started laying down the color of the sky.

“Where’s Alice?” Now that he thought about it, he hadn’t seen Alice all day today. That was unusual, usually the two girls did everything together. Well, most people would say that about him and Lucian as well.

"She’s with Aunty Marie in the back!”

Ah, so she was close by. That was good to hear.

“What about you? Where are your friends?” Jackie asked curiously.

Chuckling lightly, he swapped out his marker for a different color. “Arthur is cooking dinner today, and Lucian is probably in the Game Room with Gilgamesh and Enkidu.”

Making a surprised ‘oh’, Jackie nodded, and they settled into companionable silence as he worked.

/////

A few hours later, he was done. Jackie had wandered off when he started to shade the trees, and that was alright. He didn’t expect her to stay for the entire time. He was actually pretty surprised she had stayed for as long as she had, as Arthur had come by and offered her an afternoon snack, which she munched on happily. Though, she was careful not to get the crumbs on his work.

Picking up the sheet, he held it at arm’s length, looking to see if there were any more details he needed to add. He didn’t see any, and was pleased with the outcome. It had been a while since he did a landscape drawing, instead doing drawings of staff and Servants in Chaldea. The last time might have been before he came to Chaldea. Too long.

“Oh, you finished!” Jackie said from behind his ear.

Turning around, he handed it to her so she could look at it better. She took it reverently, and took in all the details. “Wow! It looks really good! I haven’t seen you do a landscape piece before!”

“Thanks! I think the last time I did one was a few years ago.”

Jackie handed it back to him. “You should do them more often! This is really pretty! Just like the drawing you made for me!”

Carefully putting away the drawing so it wouldn’t get damaged, he smiled. “Thank you! Maybe I’ll make more later, the next time I want some quiet time. I love my friends dearly, but quiet they are not. Unless they’re sleeping. Especially Gilgamesh. He can get very loud.”

Putting a hand to her mouth, Jackie giggled. “Good! I can’t wait to see more drawings from you!” Leaning in, she whispered, “Don’t tell Alice I said this, but you might be even better than her!”

Stifling his giggles, he mimed zipping his lips. “Got it, I won’t tell her!”


	70. Mix (Kadoc)

Most of the other staff and Servants wanted to throw a Christmas Ball, so it was all hands on deck. Most of the decorations were put up last night, and formal clothes were selected over the past month. Everyone was looking forward to it, and everywhere you went, people were talking about it. He had done some landscapes for it, and one of the other departments scanned and printed out large copies to hang in several of the larger rooms that would be used for the Ball. 

Chewing his lip in concentration, Kadoc focused on chopping the vegetables for the upcoming party later tonight. Emiya, Arthur, and the head chef were directing the various helpers on what to do. Instructions were being shouted back and forth, everyone was feeling the looming deadline. Some of the food was prepared last night, but most of it was going to be prepared fresh, the pride of the chefs demanded nothing less.

Enkidu popped his head in, and asked if they needed any help, and Arthur immediately grabbed him to help with preparing one of the main dishes. From a quick glance around, he could tell they were really aiming to outdo themselves…

Bringing over some cucumber, he started to chop that as well. According to the pinned instructions, this was going to become a side of steamed vegetables. All of this gave Kadoc a new appreciation for what the cooks did everyday, he'd have to remember to pay them compliments once the rush was over. There was no way he could do this on even a lesser scale daily.

A bowl of peas were placed in front of him, and he turned to see Enkidu, with several other bowls on a cart.

“Shirou wants you to shuck those once you finish with that list!”

“Man, the work never ends does it?” He joked back.

“Nope! It's the final rush to the finish!” Enkidu laughed, before pushing the cart further down the kitchen. Turning back to focus on his work, he realized that after the cucumbers all he had left to add were carrots, and then he could shuck the peas.

He wished he could help more than just chopping vegetables, but the head chefs were pretty adamant that no one else touch the ovens or stoves unless they were on the normal cooking rotation. Something about not having room for mistakes today.

After a few minutes, he tossed the diced carrots into the bowl, and mixed the contents slightly.

Raising his voice so he could be heard over the din, he called out, “Steamed vegetables are ready for cooking!”

Within moments, Enkidu came by again and moved the bowl to his cart, before ferrying it back to the stoves. Seems Arthur enlisted Enkidu to pick up all the dishes ready to be cooked.

Putting his hands above his head, he stretched so he wouldn't get cramps from sitting in the same spot for a few hours.

Eyeing the bowl of peas, he gulped. There were a lot of peas… This might take a while…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big thanks to everyone that left kudos on this. Now that I'm caught up, updates are probably going to slow way down.


	71. Harsh (Gabrielle)

What did Kadoc and Gudao see in that guy anyway-?! Most of the staff agreed with her, he was  _ damn creepy _ . A human, but didn’t shy away from fighting alongside that arrogant Servant of theirs. And gods, did that archer grate on her. Seeing everyone and everything as beneath him-!

She wasn't sure what pissed her off more, Archer’s holier than thou attitude or his Master’s fake grin. A grin currently aimed her way right now. Her day was downright awful, first she sprained her ankle getting out of bed and then she tripped face first into the table, leaving a large bruise. And now this guy sat across the table from her as she was eating lunch. She had no patience for this guy's bullshit right now. Ever since the newest Servant arrived, his tricks had been getting more and more malicious.

“Didn't your parents ever teach you manners?!”

That grin slipped for a moment, and she took pride in it. When it came back up, it was more fake than ever.

“Mademoiselle.” His voice was arctic. She didn't care. “Cease and desist.”

Hah! He’d been causing trouble for her ever since he came back from the France singularity. What a joke.

“Or what? Did your parents not bother to teach an unruly brat like you manners?”

His neck twitched, probably in irritation. She saw a crack in the mask. Good. Gods know he's irritated her enough! Karma!

“…Perhaps, in the future, the mademoiselle shouldn't take her anger out on unrelated persons.”

Ha! That was rich, coming from him. “You piss me off all the time with your antics-!”

A pensive expression came onto his face. “Why didn't you say so? To us, it's just harmless fun. We can't read minds, you know?”

Her eyebrow twitched and she slammed her fist on the table. “Isn't that obvious?!”

“Maybe to you, but not to us.”

God, his face just  _ pissed her off-! _

_ Smack-! _

Shaking out her wrist, a dark bruise was forming on his cheekbone where she slapped him. Served him right-! Satisfied that he finally,  _ finally _ dropped that insufferable smile, her feeling of accomplishment faded as his head stayed in one spot for several moments, before snapping around with a sickening sounding  _ crack _ !

She heard someone cheer from one side. Seemed this kid wasn't making any goddamn friends with how he acted.

There was no trace of that infuriating smile as he stood up, the bruise dark against pallid skin.

“We are thinking, the one who didn't learn manners from their parents is  _ you _ mademoiselle.”

Turning on his heel, he left and the cafeteria interrupted in cheers.

Hearing someone sit down, she sighed. Looking over to Chaldea’s newest Servant, she grumbled as she speared some salad with her fork. “Mephistopheles. Honestly. That guy is a pain-”

//////

Opening the door to Kadoc's room to drop off paperwork, she froze as she saw that weird guy. Ever since she slapped him, her week had been getting worse and worse. She bet it was his fault.

“What the fuck are you doing here-?”

Opening one eyebrow, he frowned at her. “Well we  _ were  _ resting.”

“In my friend’s room?”

“Yes. He is our friend as well.”

“Like a kid like you could have  _ friends _ .” She hissed.

He frowned. “Why do you hate us so much? We haven't done anything to you for a week.”

Oh great, he was a liar too? “Honestly kid, stop trying to save yourself. You were the one that replaced my shampoo with pink hair dye didn't you, and the one that burned my paperwork making me have to do it over! You're probably the reason my whole week went to shit!”

“No, we aren't. We wouldn't burn paperwork, or do anything that wasn't easily reversible. That's not our style.”

“Stop lying-!”

His nails curled in the blankets. “We don't lie. Don't call us a liar.”

Fingers twitching, she reached out, before he suddenly stood up, hands in his pockets and shoulders tensed. He brushed past her, stalking out of the room.

/////

Later that day, she ranted to both Gudao and Kadoc, hands gesturing wildly as she complained.

“…and then he had the  _ nerve  _ to tell me he wasn't lying, ugh-!”

Playing with his fork, Kadoc spoke up. “I don't think Lucian did it. If they said they didn't, they didn't.”

She turned and glared at Kadoc. “Honestly, why are you defending him? He's nothing but trouble.”

Looking down, he sighed. “They've been my friend for years, I know them fairly well. If you're truly agitated about something they do, they won't do it anymore if you tell them unless you did something to honestly piss them off. Even then, they're right when they say burning your paperwork is not their style, they're more likely to just punch you in the face or rip you apart with words in that case.”

She opened her mouth to respond before Gudao cut her off. “Look, maybe we can get a camera installed in your room or something…”

Nodding once, she sat back with a huff. She would get a camera in her room and prove it was that kid once and for all-!

/////

Staring in disbelief at the screen, she didn't even realize when Gudao put a hand on her shoulder.

She had caught the prankster red handed.

And it wasn't that kid.

It was Mephistopheles.

The pranking stopped for several days after she got it installed, so she made a big show of uninstalling it, while leaving a less conspicuous one there. That worked, as the next day she woke up covered in chocolate sauce and her paperwork charred to a crisp.

Rushing to check the footage with Gudao, her jaw dropped once she saw the real culprit.

“I think, you owe Lucian an apology. Or several.”

Nodding automatically, guilt twisted in her gut. She had been blaming him for weeks now, and it wasn't his fault.

And now she had the proof he wasn't lying.

/////

Asking around, she managed to track down someone that might have known where he was. According to Arthur, he should be in the Game Room.

Taking a deep breath, she pushed open the door, and he managed to notice her instantly, and stopped doing whatever he was doing (looked like singing, based on the microphone in his hands), to stare at her warily.

Reminding herself that he was justified, she fumbled for words.

“Why did you stop?”

A voice cut in. She winced. That sounded like Archer, one of the few, if not the only Heroic Spirit he got along with. The kid jerked their head in her direction. With a sigh, Archer stood up and walked into her field of view, crimson eyes looking down at her.

“ _ Mongrel. _ What did you want?”

She took a deep breath and counted to three. She looked Archer square in the eye. “To apologize.”

To her shock, the guy let out a bitter laugh, before crossing his arms. “Please. You've been demonizing us for the past month now. Why don't you cut the crap and tell us what you  _ really _ want?”

Stamping down on her first instinct to snap back at him, she reminded herself once again he was right to be defensive.

Straightening her shoulder, she looked him square in the eye. “I meant it. I'm sorry, I've been acting like a total bitch this past month. It's fine if you don't trust me anymore, if you ever did to begin with.”

He didn't reject her apology right away, instead mulling over the words. “On two conditions. One,  _ never _ bring up our parents  _ ever _ again. Two,  _ never _ call us a liar.”

Honestly, she was expecting something a lot worse than what basically amounted to “don't bring up these topics to me”. When she nodded, he seemed to lose interest, walking over to the couch and sprawling over it.

“Alright. Apology accepted.”

Breathing a sigh of relief he accepted so easily, she grinned at him. On a whim, she offered. “Hey, you like games right? Want to play some games some time?”

“Sure! Sounds fun. As long as you don't mind Archer babysitting.”

Archer sniffed. “I, the king, loathe to call it babysitting. Not too long ago she was demonizing you, most people would act wary afterwards.”

Laughing, he flapped a sleeved hand at Archer. “Yeah, but life’s too short to hold grudges over silly things~! Leaves less energy to hold a grudge for people that  _ really _ deserve it~!”

“Most people would not call what she did for the past month a “silly thing”-!”

Suppressing a shudder, she privately agreed with Archer. She was a downright bitch to him. If he considered that a silly thing not worth holding a grudge over, she didn't want to know what he push him to hold one.

Deciding it was time to leave, she spoke up. “Well, if you'll excuse me, I have to go finish up my paperwork- the real person behind this set it on fire again. Once more, I really am sorry.”

Turning around, she left the room, the kid’s laughter echoing in her ears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gilgamesh is like an angry dragon sitting on his pile of treasures and protecting it.


	72. Sentience (Gudao)

“Moving to eliminate the target.”

Cen's voice skittered down his spine, words cutting like a knife down to the bone, like a hand scratching and digging deep down to wrap around his ribcage and  _ squeeze _ . Goosebumps raised on the exposed flesh of his arms, triggered by the sense of intense  _ hatred _ behind the words despite the tone and volume of their voice not changing from the slow drawl. The sheer intensity of the emotion forced the air out of his lungs and made it close to impossible to draw breath.

When they had dropped into this Singularity, something immediately washed over them, the work of a caster’s workshop. He had no idea what it was supposed to do, but whatever it was caused Lucian to retreat into the depths of their mind and cause Cen to surface. That proved to be the Servant’s undoing. The other personality buried deep within Lucian’s psyche wasted no time in engaging the Servant that caused it, blows raining on the figure with surgical precision.

Cen was  _ terrifying _ in a fight.

It was one thing to academically know that they didn't  _ care _ about casually talking about letting someone bleed out, but another to see them systematically dismantle someone in a fight in a matter of minutes. The following fight was short, but brutally efficient. It was almost as if the other magus was the Servant, with the way their blows easily parted the Servant’s feeble defenses. The other Master had tested the Servant’s capabilities, and when they found them lacking, went in for the incapacitating blow.

Gudao could practically feel the thick satisfaction curling around them like a sentient being as they loomed over the fallen Servant on the ground. Another shiver went down his spine as the knife they had been using for the entirety of the fight transformed into a familiar T-shaped claymore, the one commonly used by Sanson. With a whistle, the claymore came down and severed the Servant’s head from his shoulders. As the spirit disappeared back to the Throne, he risked a glance towards the side.

Gilgamesh was holding Arthur back with one arm, clearly restraining the other spirit. The archer was looking on with a blank expression, while Arthur looked a moment away from exploding in fury. But aside from those two, the reactions on the face of the team for this Singularity mostly showed horror, terror, or both. Seeing as no one was going to speak up, Gilgamesh did first.

“Has your revenge been satisfied?”

It was a pointless question, and everyone present knew it. Cen tilted their head.

“Yes.”

The response came without hesitation, snapping against Gudao’s skin like the crack of a whip. He wasn't sure if the stinging sensation that followed was entirely something of his own imagination.

“Was that really necessary-?!”

Arthur growled. Cen absently licked their lips, bracing their weight on one leg.

“I could not feel Lucian with that field up.”

For a moment, Gudao thought the spirit was going to regress back to the intense dislike he had for the other Master, but instead, all the fight drained out of Arthur. “And now?”

Their lashes dropped to shadow their eyes. “Waking up slowly.”

That was good. Gudao wasn't sure if he could deal with Cen for this entire mission. Even if they only spoke one sentence at a time most of the time they showed up, each sentence felt like pins and needles under his skin. Even so, this was the first time he saw them actually  _ fight _ . At first, he thought that the feeling of  _ wrongness _ that seemed to follow them like a second skin was because of the things they said or did. That was probably a justified belief since their first meeting did not feel like each word was a scrape across his bones. But now, he wasn't so sure. Was it magecraft? If so, it wasn't like any magecraft he had seen before.

The sensation was slowly fading, but it wasn't something he would be forgetting anytime soon. Or ever.

Suddenly, he remembered a saying from his childhood.  _ Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. _ He knew that words had the capability to hurt, but he had never seen someone wield cutting words as effortless as the Master before him.

Suddenly, Cen tilted their head. “I am returning now.”

Yes… now that he was looking for it, he could even feel the bite of the words even now, though muted. They seemed calmer, and Gudao wondered if whatever caused their words to cause a psychological effect was related to their emotions. Because it was definitely stronger when their hatred saturated the air until he couldn't breathe.

“I didn't, know you could do that…” Kadoc muttered softly.

Cen snapped their head towards Kadoc. “Mmm, yes. You have not seen it because I was not truly angry before. Even when that annoying flower magus separated us, we could still feel each other in the back of our minds. But this, this was a severance. We  _ loathe _ that.”

Gudao flinched back as the intense  _ hatred _ in that one word struck him like a physical blow. Yes, whatever it was that caused their words to have a psychological effect, it was definitely based on emotion.

Kadoc swallowed, before he stepped forward and loosely enveloped Cen in a hug. They wavered, before bringing a hand to rest in Kadoc’s hair, before hesitantly patting his head.

When it happened, the shift was immediate and noticeable. The- it could only be described as  _ force _ \- vanished like smoke in the wind. They stepped back, and stretched. “Man oh man, that was really not fun…”

Oh thank God, Lucian was back. Relaxing, Gudao stepped forward and said the first thing that came to mind. “Cen is downright  _ terrifying _ .”

To his surprise, Lucian tossed their head back and laughed. “They are, aren't they-? Isn’t it just  _ delightful~ _ ?”

If anything, all that did was really cement the fact that Lucian was a loon. Deciding not to comment further, he gave himself a little shake.

“Considering this Singularity is still here, we should get a move on. That probably announced our intent to whoever is sustaining it.”

“Okay~!”

Yes. Even if Lucian was endlessly chipper despite the circumstances, Cen was really the more terrifying of the two. After all, Lucian couldn't make their words dig into his very bones.


	73. Message (Kadoc)

Looking into the fire, Kadoc sighed. He wasn’t good enough to save the world. He really wants to help, but… he’s just not good enough. Not good enough to dispel the curse from the twisted Cu Chulainn, but not good enough to fight either. That seemed to sum up his life, the words ‘not good enough’. Not good enough for his family, and not good enough to save the world.

Arthur and Lucian always said that he was good enough, but sometimes, it was hard to believe them. Especially when they were both exceptional people. And then there was him, average magus that survived the bombing of Chaldea by sheer, dumb, luck. Or because his immune system was ‘not good enough’. Ah, there were those words again.

Even Gudao was better than he was: he got along with all of the Servants that they worked with, while he, he only really got along with a handful. If it was only him in this singularity, he doubted he would have been able to win Nightingale over to their side.

When it came to saving the world… he was just so… ordinary. They wanted him for his Rayshift compatibility, but… could that be considered power? He didn’t think so. As far as he was aware, it was just the capability to shift to the singularities, nothing more, nothing less.

Poking at the fire a bit with a stick, he sighed.

He heard someone sit down next to him, and looked over to see Robin Hood. “What’s up kid? You look troubled. Something on your mind?”

After a brief debate on whether to share his worries with the Servant or not, he decided to do so. Even if this was Chaldea’s version of Robin Hood… he knew how to keep a secret and wouldn't blab to everyone.

“I don’t feel like I’m good enough to save the world. I mean, you guys are all heroes inscribed in the Throne, Lucian and Gudao are exceptional people, but… but I’m just me. A scrawny kid who’s barely able to work magecraft, with a specialty in curses, but I can't even get rid of the one on Rama…”

Robin sighed, before taking a drag on his cigarette. “Yeah, maybe you are. But you’re doing an okay job so far. I mean, without your help, Nightingale thinks Rama wouldn’t even be able to move, much less fight as he is now. So even if you couldn’t get rid of it, you’re doing something about it. I’m pretty sure out of our little gang you have the most experiences with curses, so it’s not like we could do anything better. Hell, if you weren’t here, Nightingale might have just put him into a body bag and lugged him around on her back.”

Kadoc sighed, looking down at the fire once more. “I mean, even if Nightingale had to, Rama still would have been fine… probably… so why am I needed?”

He yelped as suddenly Robin flicked his forehead. “Kid. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

“Tch, easy for you to say…”

“Man, are you always such a downer?”

Making a low noise in his throat, Kadoc didn't bother to respond.

“You should get some sleep kid, it's been a long day for everyone. Tomorrow we storm the fortress to rescue Sita. I'm sure you can manage to help then.”

Putting his stick down, Kadoc stood up and sighed as he walked over to where Lucian was chatting away with Archer while the spirit looked on with exasperation. 

Honestly, he doubted he could be of much help… Robin was probably just saying that to make him feel better, he was practically dead weight.

/////

Chewing his lip, he looked down at the spot where Sita had vanished. He tried and tried and _tried_ to get rid of the curse separating her and Rama, but it was for nothing. Looking at him with pity, she thanked him for trying, before stating she was ready to take the curse on Rama in his place.

If he was better, he could have broken the curse on both of them and they'd have another ally, but instead… Instead he was just so  _ worthless _ .

“It’s alright, you tried your best.”

Even though Rama was so close to being reunited with his wife… he didn't blame him for his ineptitude. “Yeah but, it wasn't good enough.”

The Servant patted him on the back. “They were both incredibly powerful curses, I'm not surprised you couldn't break them. I'd be surprised if you had.”

Shoulders hunching, Kadoc curled inwards. “Yeah but, throughout this entire singularity I've done absolutely nothing, been nothing but dead weight. I just… I just thought I could do something to help…”

“That's not true.”

It was. It was it was  _ it was _ .

/////

Incandescent fury.

That was the only way to describe what Archer was feeling right now. He flinched back as the air rippled around them, the only warning before a veritable shower of steel launched itself at the twisted Cu Chulainn.

When the berserker stabbed Lucian in the back with his lance, Archer was  _ furious.  _ Even Rama had taken a step or two back when he saw the look on his face.

Archer spared a glance backward, and Kadoc flinched at the rage in his eyes.

“You. Help my vassal.”

Biting his lip. Kadoc nodded. Archer was in no mood to listen if he said he was going to do that anyway, even if he didn't think he could do anything. That was fine. The best thing to do would be to stay out of Archer’s way. They both knew he couldn't break the curse.

He could hear Gudao trying to give orders to Archer to defeat their opponent swiftly, but the egotistical spirit wasn't listening. That wasn’t surprising. Often, he got the feeling Lucian was the only one the spirit bothered to listen to on a regular basis.

Turning to his friend, he could see Nightingale with a frown on her face. His hands hovered over the wound, which was expelling a dark mist. It seemed his friend was trying to get rid if the curse on their own but it wasn't enough.

Taking a deep breath, he performed a diagnosis. The result was both better and worse than when Rama was inflicted with it. Better because his friend was fighting the curse with more success than the saber. Worse because the curse was several magnitudes stronger than the one on Rama.

There was no Sita to take the curse for his friend this time. They had to beat the source quickly or Lucian would die. Tears sprung to his eyes at the thought, and he quickly wiped them away.

“Archer-!”

“ _ What-?!  _ I'm busy-!” The spirit snarled.

“Finish the fight quickly-! Lucian will die unless he's taken out as soon as possible-! They're trying to fight the curse with everything they have but they can't do it-!” His voice cracked at the end, choked with tears.

The spirit gnashed his teeth, but didn't respond. He didn’t think Archer would listen: he knew that Archer liked to, as Lucian put it, “play with his food”. He couldn't recall a time where the Servant had tried his best to end a fight quickly or cleanly at all. Not to mention the fact he wasn't Lucian, therefore the Servant probably wouldn't listen to him. After all, he didn't bother to listen to Gudao earlier…

Though, perhaps miracles do occasionally happen, as Archer started to attack the twisted Cu Chulainn with more fervor. Kadoc knew he understood, but he was shocked that the egotistical Servant had actually listened to him.

Looking back down at his friend, he worked to try and break down the curse. He couldn't get rid of it… but what he could do was give his friend more time…

Arthur moved to join the fight, but stopped as Kadoc shook his head. “I'm sorry Arthur, I need all my prana for this… I'm not a good magus, my output is pretty low… I can't sustain you in a fight as well as keeping the curse at bay…”

Looking like he wanted to protest, Arthur was stopped by Gudao’s hand on his shoulder. His mouth snapped shut.

“Leave it to us, we'll defeat him.”

Nightingale spoke up from where she was taking care of the physical wound. “Hurry, the patient does not have much time left before the curse takes them.”

His concentration faltered briefly, before he cleared his head. No, he had to stay focused.

He had to, when a slip in his attention could mean the difference between life and death. They always say to be a magus is to walk with death, but he didn't want to lose his friend to it…

/////

Kadoc breathed a sigh of relief as the curse faded. The twisted Cu Chulainn just would not stay down. But it seemed when Archer took out the demon pillar alongside both Chaldea’s Servants and the ones they allied with, that was enough to finally take him out.

Lucian sat up, before stretching and testing their range of motion even as the wound in their back started to heal. “Ugh, that sucked. Really fucking sucked.”

He felt glad, so glad that his friend was alright, even if he didn't do much to help. Turning towards him, his friend gave a wide smile. On impulse, he leaned in and gave them a hug, burying his face in the crook of their neck. They rubbed his head and whispered comforts to him, and he appreciated it. Archer’s noisy footsteps came from behind him, but he didn't want to move right now, not when he was so close to losing Lucian. They didn't even pause in stroking his hair.

“Archer~ We’re surprised you didn't play with that guy~! We could tell even when we were almost on death’s door!”

Squeezing his friend tightly at the reminder, the fingers paused briefly, before resuming.

“I, the king, was tempted, it would be only just if I, the king, made that mongrel realize what a fool he was to damage my vassal.”

Lucian hummed. “What changed your mind?”

“Your friend said you would die if I did not dispose of that mongrel quickly.”

“Oh? We're surprised you listened!”

The spirit scoffed. “I, the king, only bothered because you hold him in high regard. Though this was a special occasion, and not something that will happen regularly.”

Archer… only bothered to listen because it was him? Gudao basically said the same thing, but Archer didn't bother to listen to him. That idea made something warm curl in his chest.

“You do care~! We’re flattered~!”

A laugh bubbled in his throat as Lucian and Archer started bickering. Even if he was terrible at magecraft, maybe, just maybe, he wasn't entirely useless. Only mostly useless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finals are almost upon me. I cry.


	74. Night (Cen and Lucian)

Even though the clock read 2 AM, they weren't tired yet. Cen and Lucian sighed happily as they ran fingers through Kadoc’s hair. They were glad he was sleeping peacefully. He deserved it.

Leaning back on the bed to turn the page of their book, they smiled as Kadoc muttered in his sleep, before his fingers curled loosely around their arm. They frowned as they gave an involuntary flinch at the contact before they fought it back down. Ah, they wished it wasn't a struggle every time Kadoc clung to them… 

So warm, so very very warm… Kadoc shifted until his breath was tickling their neck, the other Master curled against them.

Safe, safe safe safe safe  _ safe _ . They always felt safe with Kadoc. They weren't sure why, but they did.

Shifting slightly so they wouldn't lose feeling in their arms, they continued to read. Ah, even if they read this over and over, these stories still held a special place in their heart. Assassin taught them how to read with these. They remembered that caster author that looked like a child said that it was foolish for having a good ending but he could stuff it. If they wanted to look at something with a bad ending, they didn't have to look any further than their life.

Their fingers tapped out a gentle rhythm on the pages as they read, energy dancing just beneath their skin. They knew they were terrible at staying still but they didn't want to wake Kadoc.

For a long while, the only sounds in the room was the sounds of turning pages, fingers tapping on the pages, and Kadoc's soft breathing. It was peaceful.

The others thought they were incapable of appreciating peace but… Wasn't this what peace was? Curled up with a book in the dim light with their best friend sleeping next to them?

Ah… they were almost at the end… Glancing at the clock, they noticed almost an hour had passed. They should go to sleep soon, Kadoc got upset if they didn't get enough sleep.

Stifling a yawn with one hand, they leaned back as much as they could without disturbing his rest. Their back popped from the effort, and Kadoc's lashes fluttered at the noise. Pausing, they waited to see if that would wake him up.

Ah… seemed that it did. He looked up at them, eyes still hazy with sleep even as he rubbed his cheek against their arm.

“Still awake?” He muttered.

They shrugged. “Wasn't tired before.”

A frown tugged at the corners of his lips. “You should sleep Lucian…”

They huffed, but didn't disagree. “Let us just get changed into our pajamas.”

They still didn't understand why they needed a separate set of clothing just for sleeping, but Archer insisted. The pajamas were nice and soft, so it was okay. Closing the door to the bathroom, they swiftly got changed, before dropping the clothes they wore during the day into the hamper.

Poking their head out the door, they saw that Kadoc was still awake and waiting for them to come out. Tiptoeing to the bed, they sat down on it, the mattress dipping slightly as they reached over to turn off the light. Curling up into the bed, they hummed softly, before startling as Kadoc put his arm over their waist and pulled them to his chest.

Their instincts screamed at them that they were trapped, but they fought them down. They weren't trapped, it was Kadoc. He wouldn't do that to them. Yes, in one corner of their mind they could register that just like always, the arm stayed loose around their waist, they could easily break the hold if they wanted to. Their mind knew Kadoc wouldn't hurt them but their body always  _ always _ disagreed at first.

Sometimes they wished they could let Kadoc just… hold them without their body instinctively screaming in protest before it settled. Even if they didn't always flinch away it hated being held at first. Would it feel nice? They thought it would. He was always so nice, so kind, so gentle, so patient, so warm.

What was it like, they wondered, to have someone they trusted hold them tightly and securely? If only this traitorous body of theirs didn't rebel against the idea, they would ask Kadoc. It was a foolish wish, but one day they really would like him to hug them tightly without the moment of instinctive terror. Would they feel safe? Warm? Cared for? They liked to think so.

“Are you alright?” Kadoc's voice murmured in their ear, interrupting their thoughts.

“Yes. Just startled us.” They curled their hands around his arm, bringing it to their chest.

“Sorry.”

“Don't be. We like being held by you, you make us feel safe and warm. It's just… our body is fucked up.” They mumbled.

“Do you? I'm glad to hear that. And it's okay, it's not your fault your body thinks being held is something bad.”

“Yeah, we know… Sometimes we wish it didn't, but there's no point thinking in what could have been.”

A hand came to stroke their hair, and they sighed at the movement. That always felt so good. “Let's go to sleep, alright?” Kadoc murmured softly.

They nodded, putting his hand to their cheek. “Yes. Goodnight Kadoc.”

Eyes fluttering shut, the last thing they remembered before they slipped into the realm of dreams was Kadoc's soft, steady breathing, the warmth of his body, and the arm curled loosely around their chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm surprised how many ways I can write a drabble about Lucian sleeping tbh.


	75. Sentence (Gabrielle)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trying something a bit different with this one. Also known as 95% of this chapter is a flashback.

“Congrats Kadoc, I'm so happy for you two!”

Kadoc shyly ducked his head and blushed to his ears as Gabrielle congratulated him for becoming a couple with Lucian. She wasn't sure where Lucian was at the moment, she would congratulate them next she saw them.

Some people thought it was odd that she was so interested in Kadoc and Lucian getting together as a couple with how vehement she was about hating Lucian early on. She didn't blame them, but they also didn't know the whole story. Gabrielle could peg the exact moment she started to root for Kadoc and Lucian to get together once she found out they weren't dating already. It wasn't when she found out they were sharing a room, or that they were physically affectionate.

It all happened during a game of Two Truths and a Lie she suggested with them, herself, Kadoc, and Gudao in order to mend bridges.

~~~

_ Gabrielle squinted as she looked at the piece of paper in front of her. _

_ “We won a grail war. We don't like being touched by strangers. We are good at cooking.” _

_ This seemed easy enough. _

_ “The first statement is a lie. You did not win a Grail War. It's too outrageous to be true! _ _ ” She said confidently. _

_ Lucian tossed their head back and cackled. “That one's true~!” _

_ “What were the other two statements?” Kadoc asked quietly as Lucian’s cackles tapered off into childish giggling. _

_ She offered him the paper, and he took it and scanned it. He winced on reading one part of it. _

_ “The third one is a lie. Lucian tried to cook once. We're lucky it didn't burn the room down…” He muttered. _

_ Lucian’s giggles slowed down, and they confirmed it. _

_ Kadoc hummed, deep in thought. “I want to know more about this Grail War business though. I distinctly remember you saying it was for ‘fools that wanted to throw their life away for a wish.’ What changed?” _

_ Lucian stopped laughing, a frown creasing their (admittedly handsome) features. _

_ “We became friends with you.” They sighed, closing their eyes and leaning their head back on Kadoc’s shoulder. “They threatened us to participate you see, once one of the professors saw the command seals appear on us. Since we were disposable, but strong. Either way, win or lose, the Tower would come out on top. So they told us to participate or they would harm  _ you  _ instead.” _

_ Kadoc's eyes were wide at this admission. “You shouldn't have risked your life for my sake… I know that living is important to you.” _

_ Lucian opened their red eye to look at Kadoc. “Isn't that what friends do? Besides, you're also  _ important _ to us.” _

_ Suddenly, Gabrielle felt she was intruding on something very, very private. She glanced towards Gudao, and got the feeling he felt the same way. _

_ Kadoc blushed at this, but his friend closed their eye and continued, either not noticing or commenting on the blush. Based on what she knew of Lucian? She would put money on it being the former. _

_ “So anyway, we wouldn't risk your safety. So we entered with the stipulation that you wouldn't be harmed or dragged into those power plays.” Their mouth twisted into a frown. “A stipulation they broke.” _

_ Letting out a sigh, Lucian gathered their thoughts and continued. She was on the edge of her seat, eager to hear what happened next. This was fascinating, especially since she had never heard of this Grail War. _

_ “So we went to France where it was being held. The goddamn fools didn't offer us a catalyst, we are pretty sure they expected us to just die. We wouldn't be surprised if the clause to bring back the grail was just to cover all their bases. But unfortunately for them, we play to win. To survive.” _

_ Lucian stretched from where they were sitting, shifting their position so they were laying with their head in Kadoc’s lap. Yeah, based on how Kadoc went even redder at that, and how they didn't react? They probably didn't notice his embarrassment. _

_ “So we summoned without a catalyst almost immediately after arriving. We got a grumpy heroic spirit, Archer. Who tried to kill us immediately for summoning him.” _

_ Kadoc's fingers suddenly tightened on where they had started stroking Lucian’s arm, and they flinched briefly at the contact, before relaxing. Kadoc mumbled an apology, but she wasn't quite sure Lucian heard it. _

_ “We survived, obviously. Back then, Archer wasn't as threatening as he is now. All brute force, no technique. Literally his answer to just about everything was ‘toss weapons at the problem until it's no longer a problem.’ All we had to do is dodge the weapons and strike. Apparently this amused him, and he declared us one of his treasures.” _

_ Having lots of weapons tossed at them wasn't terrifying to them? Did they not have a fear response? “That wasn’t scary, having so many pointy things aimed your way?” _

_ They shrugged in response. “Not really. We've had worse.” _

_ Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Gudao frowning heavily. “You were okay with that? Being seen as an object?” _

_ “Yeah. Back then, aside from Kadoc and Assassin, no one gave a shit about us. And Assassin wasn't even around to care anymore through no fault of his own. So even if we were seen as an object, at least we were seen as a ‘treasured object.’ Actually, thinking about it now, that's probably why out of all the Servants we could have summoned without a catalyst, we got Archer.” _

_ Assassin? She had a feeling there was a story behind that. _

_ “Assassin? Do you mean Sanson?” Kadoc asked quietly. He moved his hand so his fingers were carding through Lucian’s hair instead. _

_ “Hm? Oh. Yeah. We do. That's another story though. So anyway. We engaged Lancer’s Master in combat and killed him, and took our Saber and her Master. At that point, the others were gone. It was Saber and Archer left, and we beat Saber. So we won the grail, and took it back to those ungrateful fucks. Only to find out Kadoc was gone anyway.” _

_ Kadoc looked wary, as if he had an idea of where this was going and didn't want to be right about it. Honestly, after all that, she wanted to hear the ending. _

_ “So, after that, we marched to the Head of the Clock Tower and had an, ah, a minor disagreement. The result was we used the grail right in front of them, and left the Tower to find Kadoc. It took us two years to find him, and even then it was more of a coincidence.” They opened their eyes and gave a wry smile. “Dealing with Archer every day for two years was… interesting.” _

_ “Wait, didn't Archer return to the Throne?” Gabrielle asked, then added. “Wait, that's a dumb question, sorry. Obviously he didn't if l showed up with you in the France Singularity, Gudao told me. Why didn't Archer return to the Throne?” _

_ Lucian sat up and shrugged. “No idea. We didn't ask. He could have left at any time yet he decided to stay.” _

_ Morbid curiosity had Gudao asking the next question. “What did you  _ do  _ during that ‘minor disagreement?’” _

_ Lucian tilted his head. “Are you sure you want to know Fujimaru? We aren't nice. So we did some not nice things to them. Oathbreakers deserve it, after all.” _

_ Gabrielle got the sudden feeling that Lucian was testing them. But what constituted a pass and what constituted a fail was unclear. She wasn't sure what would happen if they failed but, she didn't want to find out. _

_ Swallowing. Gudao was quiet for a long moment, before he nodded. _

_ “We laid a nasty curse on them that would erode their sanity, before eroding their body afterwards. But we didn't stick around long enough to see what would happen. Why should we have wasted time on them when we could be looking for Kadoc instead?”  _

_ That was… that was scary. She noticed that Kadoc seemed resigned. As if he expected something like that. _

_ “You have knowledge of curses?” Gudao muttered absently. _

_ Laughing, Lucian smiled. A thin curl of the lips. Again, she was reminded that he was attractive. In a dangerous sort of way. _

_ “Yes. Now, shall we continue with the game? That was only one round after all…” _

_ When she and Gudao agreed, for some reason, she got the impression they passed Lucian’s impromptu test. She still wanted to know more about their relationship with Sanson but she didn't want to test the limits of their good mood. _

~~~

Yes. The exact moment when she rooted for them to get together and become a couple was when Lucian said Kadoc was important to them. They cared for him so much, it was apparent in just about everything they said and did, even if they claimed to be cruel (and validated those claims themselves). In return Kadoc cared for them deeply in return. He was very lucky to have someone that loved him that much, and she was glad for him. Not to mention that Lucian was pretty easy on the eyes when they weren't being creepy, something that happened a lot less frequently as time went on.

If she was honest, she was a bit jealous of how close they were: even before they got together they were clearly the center of each other’s world. But she wouldn't let them know that. It wasn't their fault she couldn't find love herself, and she already took out her anger on both of them for things that weren't their fault before. She would just, ah, as Dantes said frequently, wait and hope.


	76. Spin (Kadoc)

Ugh, why was this such a pain-?!

Running a hand through his hair, Kadoc sighed. He hadn't slept well in weeks, trying to work out the logistics for the battle with Solomon. But now Gudao wanted him to do all of this-?! They were trying to figure out just where the final battle was going to take place and they haven't had any luck…

Shifting the papers in front of him, he let out an irritated sigh. Why did they think he was the best person for this job anyway-!

He heard the door open, and he dreaded the idea it was Gudao with more work. Hearing giggling, his grip on the papers tightened. It was Lucian, and he really didn't have time for games.

“Oh? What are you doing?”

He's not sure what in that sentence set him off, but he put down the papers.

“Lucian, I'm not in the mood for games, not all of us are children you know-!”

His anger left him in a rush as his brain caught up with what he said, and he turned to look at Lucian. His friend was looking at him curiously. He took in a breath.

“Sorry- I didn't mean to snap at you… I've just been stressed…”

Lucian laughed. “It's okay! Really! You can snark at us if you want, we don't mind!” They skipped over so they were standing in front of him, and their fingers pulled his lips into a smile. “Kadoc-kun shouldn't treat us like glass, we won't leave him over some good natured snarking!”

Kadoc blinked, before shaking off Lucian’s fingers and ducking his head. “I ah… I just… um…”

His thoughts were cut off as Lucian spun his chair around and plopped into his lap, looking up at him with half lidded eyes. A sleeved hand came up to cup his cheek as the other caressed his jaw. Kadoc swallowed, a blush creeping up his cheeks.

“It’s okay you know. We  _ are _ friends with Gil, and his tongue is pretty sharp. We can handle it.”

But could  _ he _ handle it? He never snarked at his friend before. He was afraid it would hurt their relationship…

But… thinking about their relationship with Gilgamesh, a lot of insults were often exchanged, but at the end of the day, they were still friends. He still remembered back in America, even though Gilgamesh snarked with them all the time, when the twisted Cu Chulainn put them in critical condition, he fought viciously in revenge for what the Altered Servant had done.

Gathering his wits so he wouldn’t make a fool of himself, he tried his best to sound stern. “Yeah, alright. Now please stop emulating Gilgamesh’s flirting strategies, it doesn't suit you. Hell, it doesn't suit him either.”

Lucian cackled and leaned back, mirth glimmering in their eyes. “That's the spirit~ But if it doesn't suit us then why are you blushing~?”

Damn it. He's not sure which is worse, Lucian being oblivious to his blushing or Lucian commenting on it.

“If you're done bothering me go make yourself useful and tell Gudao to stop dumping work on me.” The comment was more bark than bite, and they both knew it. The blush on his cheeks didn't help his case.

“Aye aye captain! Will do!” They had the gall to give him a salute, before hopping off and leaving the room.

Leaning back into his chair, Kadoc let out a long groan. He had the distinct feeling he just walked right into a trap and it was probably Lucian’s fault.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Busy dying in finals and college. Also have lots of ideas but no idea how to write them.
> 
> Also apparently 'natured' is a typo according to google chrome.


	77. Repetition (Gudao)

“Everything that comes out of the Gate of Babylon is one of my treasures! If you think knowledge isn't a treasure you're a fool!”

Gudao paused with his glass halfway to his lips, before carefully setting it down. There was no way Archer knew what he was saying, right? Because Gudao recalled clearly just  _ how _ Archer’s Master arrived in Chaldea- by quite literally walking through the Gate of Babylon into headquarters, even if he didn't know what those golden portals were called at the time. It made quite the impression.

Nah, there was no way Archer meant it that literally. Or at least not when it came to Lucian anyway. He remembered when Lucian was narrating how they won the Grail War they mentioned Archer declared them his ‘treasure’, but it wasn't the same, right?

He heard Ozymandias say something, and Archer scoffed.

“Yes, fool. Even living things! Of course my vassal is a treasure, and therefore belongs in my Treasury!”

…Wait, his vassal? After a moment, Gudao recalled Archer called Lucian that. Apparently he did mean it that literally.

Gudao watched as Ozymandias said something, before letting out a booming laugh. Archer snarled something under his breath at the other king, before he stood up and stomped off. Strange though, he called almost everyone else mongrels.

At first, Gudao thought Lucian was a bit… delusional when he found out that they summoned Archer without a catalyst, especially since it seemed any fondness was one sided. However, thinking back, he couldn't recall an instance where Archer had ever called them a ‘mongrel’, even when Lucian pissed him off the spirit tended to default to ‘fool’ instead.

Oh, he still thought Lucian was a bit touched in the head, just not about this. Lucian agreed when he mentioned this.

He had to admit, he was curious, but not curious enough to actually investigate it further.

/////

“Ow ow ow-! Archer, watch it-!”

Pausing as he heard Lucian whine, Gudao frowned. What was going on? Feeling like he should at least make sure they weren't going to start tossing things at each other, he decided to check it out.

Thinking further on their interactions since he eavesdropped on that conversation, he noticed that aside from those… spars, they didn't seem to be actively attempting to cause each other harm. Indeed, he had seen them play games together on occasion… before Archer started launching pillows in fury.

Considering how easily he could be launching sharp objects instead, that was pretty notable.

Knocking on the door twice, he heard a muffled “Come in!” from Lucian. He stepped through, and stared.

Archer was holding a gilded brush, and was brushing Lucian’s hair. As Gudao watched, Archer cursed under his breath before tugging on one knot.

“Ow- hey-! Watch it-!” Lucian pouted, but didn't move.

“If you actually  _ took care of yourself _ for once in your life then I, the king, wouldn't have to brush out the knots in your hair every day. How do you even get it so knotted in one day-!”

Lucian gave a shrug, clearly not knowing or caring. In response, Archer gave a hard tug on the knot he was working on.

To be honest, Gudao agreed with Archer. With short hair, how did they get it so knotted?

“Ow-! Sheesh, you don't have to do this you know.” Lucian crossed their arms and grumbled. Gudao got the feeling they weren't talking about Archer viciously pulling in the knots in their hair.

Gudao had to prevent his jaw from dropping as Archer honest to god rolled his eyes. “We've had this discussion before. It is unbecoming of one of my treasures to have such a slovenly appearance! It reflects badly on I, the king!”

Again, Archer called them his treasure.

“Yeah yeah, are you done yet? We're getting fidgety just sitting here.”

Archer sighed loudly. “Change positions then, the gods know you can't sit still for five minutes. I, the king, am not done yet. So don't leave.”

“Sheesh, what more are you gonna do, aren't you done getting the knots out?”

Even as Lucian was speaking, they moved so they were on their stomach, their head in Archer's lap. As if suddenly remembering he was there, Lucian turned their gray eye on him.

“What did you come in here for Fujimaru?”

Shaking his head as a canister of some sort of spray dropped into Archer's hand from the Gate of Babylon, he tried to remember what he had come in here for.

That's right… “To make sure you guys weren't going to have another fight again.”

Lips curling up in amusement, Lucian huffed. “Is that what you see them as?” They sighed as Archer spread what Gudao suspected was dry shampoo onto Lucian’s hair, fingers massaging it into their scalp.

It occurred to him that what Archer was doing could be considered ‘servant work’, and he stored that away and hoped his realization didn't show on his face: he enjoyed living, thank you very much. That the egotistical spirit was  _ willingly _ doing something that most would consider servant work was… hm.

Interesting. Yeah, that.

“Yes, considering Archer seems to be intent on wringing your neck when you chase each other.”

Lucian laughed, but didn't elaborate. Gudao decided it was time to take his leave. Bidding them goodbye, he left the room, thoughtful.

He wondered how Archer justified what he was doing at that moment.

Later on, when Gabrielle mentioned that Lucian’s hair looked extra silky today, Gudao had to fight to keep a straight face.

/////

Gudao watched as Lucian approached him, eyeing the new coat they wore. It didn't seem like anything he had ever seen before- instead of zipping from the bottom up it zipped from the top down. He could tell because it was half-zipped. It was, unusual, to say the least, especially with how it flared out at the back. And it also had zippers going from the edge of the sleeve to where Gudao guessed their wrists would be.

“Nice coat Lucian, where did you get it?” He called out. Even if he wouldn’t wear it himself, it was rather nice.

Lucian grinned and did a little twirl in place, the ends of the coat flaring slightly, but less than he expected. “Do you like it Gudao? Archer got it for us-!”

The more Gudao looked, really looked at Archer and Lucian’s relationship, the more obvious it was that they really did care about each other. At first, he thought the only reason Archer was so worried about Lucian dying in America was because he would have to return to the Throne, as despite best efforts, Roman and da Vinci couldn't link his summoning to Chaldea. But if that were true, Archer wouldn’t call them a treasure on a regular basis, or brush their hair, or give them gifts.

“It's very nice, though I don't think I'd be interested in wearing the style myself.”

Lucian laughed. “That's okay! We aren't sure where Archer got it from: we hadn't seen a coat like this before. And it's really nice, it doesn't get in the way of our movements at all, even during a spar! It's even got a bunch of places to hide weapons, and it's really warm too!”

It sounded like an expensive coat. Based on what he knew of Archer, he wouldn't surprised.

“It suits your style very well: you have good taste.” Gudao commented.

Lucian lifted up one arm, and the sleeve dropped past their hand. Gudao was struck by how childish that made them look. “Eh, not really. We've worn clothes that had loads of holes in them before. Clothing is clothing and as long as it keeps us warm that's all we need. We wear what we do because Archer insists. And they're comfy.”

Gudao raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

Nodding once, they beamed. “Yes, Archer said that none of his treasures should look so shabby, you know. He picked all our clothes out himself.”

Without another word, they put their hands behind their back and slipped past him. “Bye bye! We need to go, we are meeting Arty for lunch!”

Saying goodbye, Gudao thought about what they said. Their entire wardrobe was picked out by Archer, and they didn't seem to have a problem with it. That reference to Lucian being one of Archer’s treasures showed up again too.

If Archer called him a treasure he would probably feel vaguely offended, since he knows the Servant means it in a literal way.

But if Lucian didn't mind it… well, it wasn't his business.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gilgamesh cares more about Lucian's appearance than they do.


	78. Abuse (Gabrielle)

Gabrielle paused in the middle of talking with Gudao as she saw… was that… Arthur? Dragging Lucian by the collar down the hall? Rubbing at her eyes, she wanted to make sure she wasn't hallucinating and… yep. The scene didn’t change at all. Arthur was still dragging Lucian by the collar down the hall.

“Gabby? What's wrong?” Gudao asked.

In response, she pointed behind him. Lucian caught sight of them as Gudao turned around, and they waved. Arthur sighed, and flicked their ear sharply.

“Ow-! Arrrrrrty…” They whined as they rubbed the abused appendage, giving Arthur one of the most pitiful looks Gabrielle had ever seen. Even though she knew that Lucian was nowhere as innocent as that look implied, she felt pity for them.  However, the person the look was aimed at was unaffected, and just rolled his eyes in clear exasperation. Snorting, Lucian dropped the act and snickered.

Gudao got his wits back first. “Uh, what happened?” His question was directed to the Servant.

Arthur just groaned, and Lucian laughed. “This one…” Arthur gave his giggling captive a light shake, “thought it would be funny to upend a bowl of glitter onto Merlin. I'm not sure I want to know why.”

Lucian crossed their arms and huffed. “But it was  _ funny _ ! You just have no taste Arty-! Now Merlee’s hair matches his flowers!”

Merlee-? Merlin? Knowing Lucian’s tendency to nickname everyone, that was probably their nickname for Merlin.

Sighing forlornly, Arthur started to drag Lucian once more. “If this version of Merlin is anything like the one I know, you just started a month long prank war.”

Lucian stopped laughing and grinned. “Sounds like fun!”

“Where are you taking them?” Gabrielle murmured with morbid curiosity as Arthur just let out a long sigh.

“Not far. Just down to the Game Room.”

Lucian perked up at that. “Oh oh oh, can we do some singing then-? Since you don't want us to play with Merlee?”

Arthur looked down at Lucian and pretended to think about it, (Gabrielle could tell he was planning on saying yes from the start) before he said, “Yeah, I guess we can until dinner.”

With a cheer, Lucian started to squirm and twist around in Arthur's grip. In moments, they managed to extricate themselves with a final twist that made Gabrielle’s back twinge in sympathy. Turning on their heels and putting their hands behind them, Lucian cocked their head. “Do you wanna join us?”

Gabrielle grinned. “Sure! I don't know how good I'll be though!” She turned to consider her childhood friend. “What about you Gudao?”

He shrugged. “Maybe for a little while. Alright, lead the way!”

Beaming, Lucian turned around to skip towards the Game Room, humming happily. Arthur heaved a relieved sigh before following slightly behind them.

“Arthur, do you think that this defused the potential prank war?” Gudao spoke up. Gabrielle looked over and could practically see the gears in Gudao’s mind turning.

Arthur snorted. “Absolutely not. Delayed it until dinner though. Prepare yourself for the next couple of weeks.”

Despite herself, Gabrielle couldn't stop the shiver that went down her back at that. Hopefully they were mindful of collateral damage. Maybe. Lucian wouldn't go out of their way to cause widespread havoc, they just didn't  _ care _ .

She hoped that there wasn't collateral damage.

/////

Gabrielle thought Lucian being dragged away by the collar was a one off event as she hadn't seen it since that day about two months ago. True to Arthur’s prediction, a month long prank war broke out between Merlin and Lucian that only ended once all of Lucian’s friends conspired to get both pranksters covered in fish sauce.

Yeah, Gabrielle wasn't sure how that ended the prank war either. Enkidu advised her that the less she thought about it the better. 

But she was getting off track. She yelped as golden chains came from behind her, shot down the hallway, before they looped around the corner. Recognizing them as Gilgamesh’s, she wondered what the hell he doing. She couldn’t recall him ever using those chains inside Chaldea unless he was sparring, not… whatever this was. It was almost like the chains were searching for something.

A figure rounded the corner from the direction the chains came from, and Gabrielle and opened her mouth to ask what was going on. She closed it when she saw the vein throbbing in Gilgamesh’s eye. His hair was also day-glo orange. The shade made her eyes water. Making a split second decision, she decided she didn’t want to know exactly what happened, even if it was almost definitely Lucian’s fault.

As part of that prank war half of Chaldea’s staff and Servants wound up with dyed hair. Lucian’s friends had avoided that fate back then but a few days after the official end to the prank war, Arthur wound up with lime green hair for a week. Then a day after Arthur’s hair went lime green, Enkidu’s hair became hot pink for a week as well. Both colors were just as eye searing as Gilgamesh’s current color.

Last she heard, there was a growing betting pool onto whether Lucian was ballsy enough to prank Gilgamesh, and if they would prank Kadoc as well. She was one of the few people to put down a ‘yes’ for Gilgamesh and a ‘no’ for Kadoc. Seems like they finally snagged Gilgamesh, and he was not happy.

Watching as the chains stopped, Gilgamesh started to reel them in like a fishing line, and she was unsurprised when Lucian was revealed, cackling madly on the other end. Once Lucian was nose to nose with Gilgamesh, they stopped cackling and grinned at the King of Heroes.

“ _ You _ .” Gilgamesh growled out.

“Us.” Lucian said agreeably. For someone bound in chains, they were unerringly chipper.

“You, are a  _ goddamned menace. _ ” Gilgamesh hissed.

Lucian chuckled and gave Gilgamesh two thumbs up. “Day-glo orange is a good color for you Gil! You should wear it more often!”

Letting out an inarticulate cry of rage, Gilgamesh spun on his heels, walking back down the hallway, his captive dragging behind him.

“That’s kinky Gil! We didn’t realize you were the kind of guy to have sex on the first date!” They paused, then added, “Actually, let us rephrase. We didn’t realize you were the kind of guy to have  _ kinky _ sex on the first date!”

Gabrielle put a hand to her mouth to muffle her laughter. She could see Gilgamesh’s eyebrow twitch, before he flipped them off. “It’s been  _ much _ longer than the first date with you.”

Did he really just say that?! Did that mean Lucian and Gilgamesh were dating too? She knew Lucian was dating Kadoc who was dating Arthur, so she wouldn’t be surprised if Lucian actually  _ was _ dating Gilgamesh.

Huh, now that she thought about it, Gilgamesh did treat them like a lover. Gudao told her once that he saw Gilgamesh brushing Lucian’s hair, and that Gilgamesh gave them gifts frequently. Not to mention the fact that Gilgamesh called Lucian “his treasure” a lot. Yeah, they were probably lovers too.

Lucian must have heard, because they started to snicker, before composing themself to give what could only be described as bedroom eyes at Gilgamesh’s back. “Aw… Gil~ You flatter us~ Is it the fifth date then?”

Visibly exasperated, Gilgamesh pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, counting to ten in what Gabrielle assumed was Sumerian. Once he was done, he turned to Lucian and tsked, his gaze assessing them carefully. Gabrielle dearly hoped that Gilgamesh didn’t decide to involve her with whatever it was. She let out a sigh of relief as Gilgamesh turned around, and started to walk down the hall away from her. Lucian gave her a wave as they were dragged along. Mind on autopilot, she waved back.

Once both of them were out of sight, her hand fell limply to her side. She felt like she really dodged a bullet there.

Later on, she realized that was almost literal. According to Gudao, Gilgamesh launched Lucian at the next person to comment on his hair. Poor Jekyll didn’t deserve that…


	79. Confess (Gabrielle, Cen and Lucian)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter gets vaguely NSFWish at the end.

Gabrielle got a sense of déjà vu as she turned a corner and saw Kadoc cursing under his breath and dragging Lucian behind him by the collar. Lucian seemed to get dragged around a lot. At least by their friends anyway. She remembered the time with Arthur, and then the time with Gilgamesh. She was surprised Kadoc was dragging them this time though. At the moment Lucian was complaining about “wanting to punch that prissy goddess in the face-!” They were more irritated than she could remember seeing them in  _ months _ .

That… sounded like a bad idea. Even if she had no idea who they were talking about, punching a goddess in the face sounded like a  _ really _ bad idea.

“Hey Kadoc!” She called out. Once he paused and looked towards her, she continued. “What happened?!”

Instead of Kadoc speaking up, Lucian interrupted. They really must have been annoyed… “That prissy goddess that caused Kidu to leave Gil got summoned and started saying stuff like how Gil and Kidu deserved it for destroying her pet!”

…Sometimes Lucian’s habit of not calling people by their first name was such a pain. Let's see… sounds like someone from Gilgamesh and Enkidu’s legend… uh… hm… Crap, she wasn't good at mythology… That was always Kadoc’s area of expertise…

Turning to look at the man in question, Kadoc took pity on her.

“Ishtar, or Inanna. The Mesopotamian Goddess of War, Good Harvests, and Beauty.” Kadoc added helpfully. “When Gilgamesh rejected her marriage proposal she begged her father to release the Bull of Heaven, and when Gilgamesh and Enkidu killed it, she begged for the death of either of them. Since Enkidu was created by the gods he died.”

Lucian crossed their arms and sniffed. “She needs to be taken down several pegs!”

Kadoc closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand, before slowly counting to ten under his breath. “Arthur and I told both of you why that would be a  _ terrible _ idea and one you would regret!”

“Both of them-?” Gabrielle asked.

“Yeah, Gilgamesh wanted to attack her too. Arthur, Iskander, and Lord El-Melloi the Second were holding him back. Enkidu doesn't know yet, but Gudao sent Dantes to tell him.” Kadoc summarized.

Oh no. This would end terribly.

“We could take her-!”

Gabrielle could practically see Kadoc’s patience snap. “No you couldn't-! She would  _ kill _ you-!” His voice broke on the second to last word, and she felt bad for him, but she wasn't sure what to say. Lucian seemed to be the same, as they seemed to quiet down a bit, but were frowning slightly. Kadoc took it as an invitation to continue.

“Look, I just,  _ please _ take care of yourself more-! I don't… I don't want you to die because I... because… because I… I love… you…” As Kadoc spoke, his voice got quieter until the last three words were barely a whisper, a flush creeping up his cheeks.

Tilting their head, Lucian frowned. “That would make you happy? We know you've been stressed lately: will this help you?”

Now that Lucian mentioned it, Gabrielle could see dark circles under Kadoc's eyes. They were right: he did look pretty stressed. But… they sounded like if they would stop, it was only for Kadoc’s sake. Maybe that was true.

Dipping his head, Kadoc’s shoulders started to shake. “Yes. To both. I don't want to have to worry about you and Gilgamesh getting yourselves killed because you pissed off a goddess, even if she deserves it. I want you both  _ here _ and alive, or close to alive in Gilgamesh’s case, instead of dead or returned to the Throne…”

Blinking slowly, Lucian hummed thoughtfully. “Okay.”

Shoulders heaving, Kadoc took in a shuddering breath. “You promise not to attack her?”

Gabrielle stepped back a little to give them space as Lucian nodded. “Yes. We promise.”

Letting go, Kadoc sank to the floor tangling his hands into his hair, hiccuping softly and shaking. Frowning, Lucian squatted down next to him and hesitantly reached out to Kadoc’s shoulder.

Lucian’s eyes flicked up to hers, and she was reminded she was intruding. Backing away, she went back the way she came.

……

Once Gabby left, Cen and Lucian sat down and pulled Kadoc into their lap, rubbing what they hoped were soothing circles into his shoulder. He was still shaking, and when they were shaking, this helped them so…

Letting out a choked sob, Kadoc turned and buried his face in their neck, his fingers clinging to the front of their shirt.

“Don't… please… I don't want to lose you… not again… You're my best friend… and someone I love  _ so much _ …” Kadoc choked out.

Cen and Lucian hummed softly. Love… The state of having deep affections for a thing or person. Kadoc was so kind to them, so warm, so good to them. Did they love Kadoc back? Maybe. How did someone decided they were in love? They always enjoyed being with Kadoc, in a different way than enjoying Arty or Gil or Kidu’s company. They weren't sure what it was that made being with Kadoc different, warmer. Was it because they knew him the longest? No, that didn’t sound right.

They weren't sure. No one could tell them what it meant. Every time they asked someone they kept getting more and more confused. They just wanted to be with him and cherish him and they didn't want him to be sad and they wanted him happy. They wanted to stay with him. They weren't sure if this was love, they didn't know enough. They didn't want to lie to him, to lose him, to make him sad.

“Lucian…? Did I say something wrong…?” Kadoc whispered softly. It sounded like he was going to cry. They didn't want him to cry.

“No.” Ah, that’s right. They could ask him too. “Kadoc, how did you know that you loved us? How does it feel?” They murmured.

Kadoc was silent for a long moment, and they started shifting around in impatience. They were terrible at staying still.

“I think… I fell in love with you because you always accepted me after we became friends. No matter what happened, you were always there for me. But that's not what you asked right? I knew I was in love with you when you patiently helped me with my magecraft as best as you could. Instead of giving up on me like everyone else, you helped me. I want to be by your side, and help you as much as I can. Just spending time with you makes me feel warm and fuzzy, and when you're sad it  _ hurts  _ me.”

Cen and Lucian hummed thoughtfully. That sounded a bit like what they felt.

“We think… we love you. Seeing you sad makes something inside us twist and hurt and ache, worse than any flesh wound we get. We don't want you to hurt.” They felt Kadoc pause, but continued. “We want you to be happy and just being with you makes us feel warm. You were patient with us while we tried to make sense of these feelings. Thank you.”

Suddenly, Kadoc pulled away and tackled them in a hug. They braced themself for the instinctual terror as Kadoc’s weight toppled them both to the floor, but it never came. Ah… he was so warm, and they could feel Kadoc’s steady heartbeat against their chest, and his legs tangled with theirs. Letting out a pleased sigh, they nosed Kadoc’s ear. Warm… They wondered if other people felt like this when they got hugs. If so, they could understand why people liked getting hugs so much. It made them feel  _ safe _ .

“You didn't flinch.” Kadoc observed softly.

“No.” They agreed with slight wonder in their voice.

Giggling happily, Kadoc pulled back, fondness in his eyes, before he leaned in and pressed his lips to theirs. They felt Kadoc's hands cup their face as they let him deepen the kiss. They hummed into it as they heard him moan softly, before he pulled away, eyes shining and cheeks flushed. After a moment, Kadoc kissed them again. This one was messier, more desperate. They felt his hips grind against theirs, and he moaned. Did that feel good to him? Experimentally, they brought a knee to his crotch and pressed. Kadoc gasped, before moaning even louder. It did feel good for him then. They should do it again.

“You know, when Gabrielle pointed us here we were under the impression that Kadoc was about to cry. Not…” A voice that Cen and Lucian recognized as Arty’s spoke up and then trailed off.

“Not you two molesting each other on the floor of the hallway.” Gil finished for him. Without missing a beat, they gave Gil the middle finger at the same time as Kadoc stilled and pulled away, muttering “Like  _ you _ have any room to judge.”

Kadoc’s pupils were so wide they couldn't see the amber color of his eyes even though his face was only inches from theirs.

Hearing someone snort from behind them, they tilted their head back, not really willing to disentangle themselves from Kadoc yet. Their own eyes met Gil’s as he huffed and crossed his arms.

“If you two are going to fuck, at least go to your room. It’s literally right around the corner.” Gil deadpanned.

They saw Kadoc’s flush return, but whether it was from anger or embarrassment they couldn't tell. Both, maybe.

Cen and Lucian snapped a “Fuck off!” at him, and were surprised when it came out in stereo. Kadoc must have said it at the same time.

“He has a point- if you are going to have sex you really shouldn't do it here.” Arty muttered under his breath.

Standing up and swearing under his breath, Kadoc curled one hand around their wrist, before storming off back to their room.

“Remember to use protection!” Gil called out.

Cen and Lucian snorted as Kadoc flipped him off but didn't even pause in walking away. Gil could deny it all he wanted but he was  _ such _ a nosy bastard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was INTENDED to be "Anger born of worry". What actually happened was it started as "Anger born of worry", then went to hurt/comfort and then to vaguely NSFW. Do I write the fic or does the fic write me.
> 
> Also three cheers for emotional stunting amirite? /s


	80. Star (Gilgamesh)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mistletoe shenanigans!

Gilgamesh watched as Lucian drew all attention to themself as they danced with various Servants of all genders. Even now after seven singularities, they still were far more comfortable with the company of Servants instead of humans. He watched as their current partner, Dantes, spun them around with all the grace of a rampaging boar. Apparently even though the man dressed well he was terrible at dancing.

Lucian wore in a navy blue dress shirt and a black waistcoat with silver thread in looping patterns that shimmered like the stars. They also wore pants that matched the waistcoat, but with the sparkling thread creeping up the sides of the garment instead. Completing the ensemble was a pair of dark dress shoes as well as delicate-looking silver bands at their throat and wrists.

He was pretty pleased with that outfit if he did say so himself. Lucian shone with the brilliance of the stars as they spun their way across the dance floor, something that was only fitting for one of his most precious treasures. They garnered looks of envy from Elisabeth and Nero, and ones of awe from Marie and Gabrielle. Indeed, he thought he saw a look of adoration and faint lust on Kadoc as well. If anyone else looked at them that way he would have marched over and demanded to know their intentions. 

Enkidu had called him overprotective the first time he saw him do that, and Gilgamesh did not deny it. Lucian was strong physically, but mentally they were still vulnerable to people that wanted nothing more to use them and toss them aside. Wounds of the heart healed slower than those of the body, and that was especially true for them. As their friend, he wanted to make sure no one took advantage of them like the scum that called herself their birth mother. Kadoc had proven himself time and time again that he only wanted what was best for Lucian, and no matter how he felt, if Lucian did not want to return those feelings at the moment, regardless if they were lust or otherwise, he would refrain from acting on them. Yes, Gilgamesh trusted Kadoc to not take advantage of Lucian and he had yet to be disappointed by the pale haired master.

In fact, Kadoc was still sitting on the sidelines instead of dancing. Carefully, Gilgamesh weaved his way amongst the crowd until he was next to the shorter man.

“I highly doubt Lucian would decline a dance from you.” He commented.

Kadoc jumped slightly, and turned to look at Gilgamesh, face slightly pink. “I don't like dancing.”

Gilgamesh tilted his head in acknowledgement, and let the subject drop. That was fine. He was not fond of the activity either. Both of them turned to look as Lucian was passed off to Marie, and both of them started dancing a slow waltz. It was clear Lucian had never danced a waltz before, but they were having fun.

“Hey Gil, Kadoc.” Enkidu spoke from behind them. He tilted his head towards his first friend in acknowledgement. “Woah, Lucian looks beautiful. Did you pick out their clothes Gil?”

“Of course I did. I always do, and they're pleased with everything I pick out.”

“Even the sheep pajamas.” Kadoc commented. Gilgamesh groaned in dismay at the reminder.

“Sheep pajamas?” Enkidu asked curiously.

“ _ Sparkling rainbow  _ sheep pajamas.” Kadoc confirmed. “Gilgamesh got them as a joke. They're now Lucian’s favorite pair.”

Drawing a hand over his face in a look of long suffering, he just sighed loudly as Enkidu laughed.

They watched as Lucian was passed off to Arthur, and the music switched to something upbeat. Gilgamesh screwed up his face. He didn't care much for these ‘pop’ songs unless Lucian was singing: most of the singers had ridiculously high voices and it grated on his ears.

Though, he has to admit that those songs suited their personality. But still. Lucian and Arthur were dancing happily to the beat, grinning from ear to ear, commanding the attention of the dance floor.

They looked radiant.

/////

After two songs, Lucian and Arthur meandered over to where the rest of their group was standing, Arthur practically supporting Lucian on the way. Gilgamesh rolled his eyes as Lucian sank down in the open seat next to him, leaning against his side.

_ “Shouldn't you be doing this with your boyfriend?” _ He asked mentally.

_ “Probably. Kadoc isn't that into public displays of affection though. We don't want to make him uncomfortable with all these people around.” _ They responded.

Gilgamesh hummed thoughtfully, before speaking aloud, “Why are you collapsing onto me?!”

Lucian chuckled, snuggling deeper into his side. “Our feet are sore from dancing and you're the nearest body Gil!”

Picking up one of the strawberries on his plate, Gil poked the corner of their mouth with it. “Then eat and recover your strength.”

Obediently, Lucian opened their mouth, and Gil popped the fruit inside. They made a pleased noise at the taste.

Spending the next twenty minutes gradually feeding them the entire plate of food, he watched as Enkidu grew more and more amused. “Not. One. Word.” He hissed. 

“I wasn't going to say anything.” Enkidu said smugly.

Arthur rolled his eyes before addressing Lucian. “Want to dance some more? I think Gilgamesh is done feeding you now.”

Gilgamesh flipped him off. Kadoc sighed.

“Still a bit exhausted. Later!” Lucian grinned.

Deciding to move to one of the nearby couches, Gilgamesh brought Lucian with him before they could start squabbling.

/////

Gilgamesh blinked as Alice came over to where he and Lucian had moved after eating. Arthur went to go check on the kitchens, and Kadoc and Enkidu went elsewhere, probably to talk to others. But, why was this tiny girl-Servant coming up to them?

“You need to kiss now.” She said imperiously.

He exchanged a look with Lucian. Good. They were just as confused as he was.

“If you're under the mistletoe with someone else you have to kiss! It’s the  _ rules _ !”

Gilgamesh sighed. It would be easier just to do as she said and get it over with instead of trying to argue. Dropping to one knee, he pressed a quick kiss to Lucian's forehead before standing up again. Arching a brow at Alice, he drawled, “There. Satisfied?”

Alice pouted. “No! Not a kiss like Mommy gives me at night! A  _ real _ kiss! On the lips!”

That was, well. He made a pained noise. Kadoc would be displeased.

He heard a faint snort from behind him, and, speak of the devil. There he was with Arthur and Enkidu. Except he looked, amused?

“You heard her. It's the rules.” Kadoc said with the same amount of seriousness. Arthur muffled a laugh behind his hand, and Enkidu snickered. Gilgamesh rolled his eyes.

He groaned in dismay. There would be no getting out of this would there? Looking to Lucian, they had an amused smirk on their face. “Brat.” He grumbled.

Someone snorted behind him. “Mongrels. The lot of you!”

He might as well get this over with.

Heaving an aggrieved sigh, he leaned down to cup Lucian’s chin before fitting his lips over theirs. He slipped his tongue inside to briefly map their mouth, before pulling away with a gentle suck. He hissed as they nipped his tongue on the way out. Brat.

Lucian licked their lips, eyes half-lidded and practically oozing sex appeal. He could hear Kadoc whimper as he saw the look on their face. He swatted them on the head. “ _ Brat _ .”

Ignoring the “who, us?” look this earned him, he turned on his heel and flipped them all off collectively.

“Filthy  _ mongrels _ . The lot of you!” He tossed over his shoulder.

Lucian’s cackles filled his ear long after he left them behind. He hoped Kadoc could at least restrain himself until the ball was over before jumping their bones. With what a tease they were, his self-control would probably be pushed to the limit.

Brat. 


	81. Doubt (Gilgamesh)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happens right after Star. Includes references to homophobic slurs, and traumatic flashbacks

Gilgamesh was still stewing in an unused room when Enkidu found him after the mistletoe incident. He raised an eyebrow. “Yes…?”

Enkidu pursed his lips. “Someone started throwing homophobic slurs at Lucian when they started dancing with Arthur again. Kadoc thinks this person saw you kiss them under the mistletoe. Kadoc and I split up to look for you while Arthur is trying to convince them that murder is frowned upon. Last I saw he wasn't having very much success.”

As Enkidu spoke on, Gilgamesh’s temper wound tighter. How  _ dare _ this  _ mongrel _ say that to Lucian?

Balling his hands into fists, he stormed off back to the room where the Ball was. Tch. He should have fought harder to avoid the mistletoe incident, but what was done was done. Now they had to deal with the fallout.

Considering he was willing to bet nobody was willing to toss those slurs his way because of who he was, he sniffed. Just because Lucian wasn't a Servant didn't mean they should be harassed about it. In his time no one bothered with such petty details. It's not like they were actually homosexual: as far as he was aware, the only person they were romantically interested in was Kadoc, and he just happened to be male. If Kadoc happened to be female he doubted Lucian would care.

That probably explained why Kadoc wasn't the one trying to convince Lucian that murder is frowned upon. While Gilgamesh admitted he was good to Lucian, he was a bit sensitive to these sorts of things. In the past he would blame Kadoc for not being strong enough but now, he understood he tried his best, but his best was not enough for this. Besides, if they didn't hassle  _ him _ this mongrel must think non-Heroic Spirits are fair game for their foolish slurs.

Rounding the corner he entered the hallway where most of the Ball was being held just in time to catch the tail end of one of the mongrel’s slurs. He gritted his teeth as he saw Lucian lay limp in Arthur's grip, the other Servant now looking quite murderous himself.

“ _ Mongrel. _ ” Gil glowered at the man, using his full height to loom over him.

Gilgamesh had the satisfaction of watching the mongrel flush am angry red. “So? Why does a Heroic Spirit like yourself care so much for this bastard anyway?”

“ _ Lucian _ is my friend.” Gilgamesh stressed. No one was allowed to call Lucian a bastard with malicious intent. He refused to allow it. “They shouldn't have to put up with your bullshit because your masculinity is so fragile the idea of being with another man punctures your ego.”

The mongrel sputtered, before drawing himself up to his full height. “Yeah well, who the  _ fuck _ are you?”

Ah. It seems either this mongrel had the memory of a pea or Kadoc’s guess was wrong. “ **Mongrel!** I am the King, Gilgamesh!”

He took great pleasure in how the man paled rapidly. As he should. Under the force of the glare, the mongrel scurried away. Good. Turning to Lucian, he made a come hither motion with two fingers. Arthur let then go, and he frowned as Lucian stumbled, before managing to make their way to him. He casually looped an arm around theirs and dropped his mouth to their ears as he lead them to a shaded alcove and rubbed small circles into their shoulders.

“Do not worry, I, the King, will take care of it. I won't let that mongrel bother you any longer. As one of my dearest treasures, I won't let him hurt you further. That mongrel did not harm you too much, did he?”

Because there was no way Lucian would be like this if that mongrel didn't hurt them at all.

Lucian let out a shuddering breath as they grabbed at his waistcoat. “Not physically. He said, ‘There is no way your parents could love someone like you!’ and that we shouldn't have been born-that we are fucked up-that we should have  _ died _ -!” Their breath hitched as they gripped the material tighter.

Gilgamesh hissed even as he pulled them closer. How  _ dare _ this mongrel say that. How  _ dare _ he?!

Leaning down to cup their chin, he could see they were barely holding on to the present. “Lucian. Listen to me. Your ‘parents’, and I say this in the poorest sense of the word, were utter scum. You deserve to live. You deserve to be happy. No one deserved what you went through. Understand?”

Lucian hiccuped softly, before burying their face into his chest.

That mongrel was going to  _ suffer _ . He would make sure of it  _ personally. _

“Lucian…?” Kadoc murmured as he hugged them from behind. “Will you be okay?”

“Yes… we… yes. But we want to leave now…”

Gilgamesh looked to Kadoc, who nodded seriously and started to tug them back to their room. He had some business to take care of, but he would go stay with them after it was done. Tch.

He needed to have some _ words _ with Merlin.

/////

After extracting a promise from Merlin to make that mongrel’s life very difficult for the rest of the Ball, he made his way to Lucian’s room. Well, technically it was Kadoc’s but Lucian slept there too. As did Arthur. When he entered, Lucian was curled up under the blankets in Kadoc’s lap, and Kadoc was rubbing their back and whispering soft comforts.

He sat down on the bed and Lucian scooted so they were sprawled over both him and Kadoc.

“What sort of business did you have?” Kadoc mumbled softly.

“I asked Merlin to make the rest of that mongrel’s night miserable so I could stay with Lucian. I, the King, will personally make his life for at least the next few months utterly miserable.”

“ _ Good. _ ” Kadoc hissed.

Lucian let out a choked cry along the lines of “We’resorrywedidn’tmeanit-!” before settling down somewhat, their soft sobs echoing through the room.

“Let me help.” Kadoc balled his hands into fists.

Gilgamesh nodded seriously even as he stroked their head. Their inner demons were out in full force and it was all that mongrel’s fault. He reached out for their hand and stroked the back carefully.

The door opened, and Arthur poked his head in, took one look at Lucian, and stepped inside. At this point, Lucian was trying to get as much physical affection as they possibly could, a need that Gilgamesh and Kadoc were happy to oblige.

The fact that Lucian was so clingy when they were having flashbacks because they hadn't had any physical affection for over the first decade of their life was horrible. It was their way of trying to remind themself that they were here, and not there, with varying success. It seemed this time it was erring on the side of ‘Not very successful’.

“Enkidu is on his way, he just is letting Gudao know where we all are.” Arthur said softly.

“You're doing so  _ well _ Lucian, it's going to be okay. We won't let him hurt you anymore.” Kadoc whispered. Lucian let out another sob and buried their face into his shoulder.

Arthur managed to fit onto the bed, and with four people, it was getting slightly crowded. He cradled Lucian’s head, and they looked at him and babbled softly. “Hey… you look… like a knight… we wanted… we wanted someone… to save us… back then… but no one… no one came for… so… so long… it was so dark… and everything… everything hurt…”

Arthur swallowed thickly, not quite sure what to say. Eventually, he settled for, “I'm here now.”

“Y-yes…” Lucian murmured, and tucked themself under his chin.

Kadoc let out a soft cry as Lucian began to spill their past in bits and pieces to Arthur. They spoke of how they heard about the tales of a knight in shining armor and wondered if someone like that would come for them, if they were worthy enough for it. They spoke of how they wanted to be cared for and cherished and not hurt all the time. It made Gilgamesh’s chest ache.

His beautiful, strong, brilliant Lucian shouldn't have had to suffer like that. Enkidu had entered the room halfway through Lucian’s babblings, and locked the door behind him.

“We were so weak… if we were strong… we could… we could have… freed ourselves… but we had to… had to wait… to be rescued…” Lucian rasped.

Arthur looked a bit lost in how to respond. Gilgamesh sighed and leaned over to gently tuck a strand of hair behind their ear. “You aren't weak. You're very strong, maybe even the strongest person I know.” They must be, to carry such a heavy burden and still manage to stay happy most of the time. “Parents are supposed to take care of their offspring. It is not your fault yours did not.”

Lucian hiccuped softly, and looked hopefully at Gilgamesh. “Really?”

He nodded seriously. “Really.”

Enkidu hummed softly, running his finger through their hair.

Deciding that Gilgamesh was telling the truth, Lucian wiggled into the middle of the bed and yawned, exhausted. They bundled themself deeper into the blankets, before their breath evened out in sleep. The four of them exchanged looks. No one was willing to leave them alone tonight.

/////

Predictably, Lucian was pretty embarrassed when they woke up in the morning tangled up between Kadoc and Arthur. Gilgamesh and Enkidu rolled out a second mattress from his Treasury and slept on that overnight.

“Sorry… We… we weren't ourselves last night.”

Arthur yawned and sat up. “It's alright. It's not your fault.”

Lucian flushed, probably remembering what happened last night. “You all-?” They trailed off.

Enkidu spoke up from Gilgamesh’s other side. “We won't judge you. Arthur is right, it's not your fault.”

Their gaze dropped to their lap as they hummed. It would take time. They were still so unused to trusting others with the most vulnerable parts of themself.

Lucian changed the subject with all the subtlety of those sheep pajamas they loved so much, and everyone let them. “Did you all stay here last night?”

Kadoc rolled over, groaning softly as he cuddled Lucian closer. They made a surprised noise as he did so, but didn't push him away. “We did. We were worried about you…”

“Even though-?” Lucian looked down and sighed, changing what they were saying. “You shouldn't have… we’re sorry for ruining your evening…”

“Even though you were having a flashback, yes.” Enkidu said gently. “It's nothing to be ashamed of. And as for ruining our evening, you didn't. We all wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“We... thank you.”

Arthur put a hand on their head. “What kind of friends would we be if we abandoned you?”

Lucian jolted. “Friends-?”

Kadoc huffed against Lucian’s neck. “Friends. We're all your friends, have been for a while. You and Gilgamesh are just allergic to the word.”

The protest was immediate. “We are  _ not _ allergic to the word! You've been spending too much time with Enkidu!”

Arthur rolled his eyes at him and Gilgamesh flipped him off. The familiarity coaxed a weak laugh from Lucian.

“Do you want to go get breakfast? If not, I think I can swing by and grab something for the five of us.” Arthur commented as he stood up.

Lucian twisted their hands in the blanket. “We want to stay here… for just a little while longer.”

Arthur nodded. “I understand. I’ll get us all something to eat, okay?”

“Okay. And… thanks… all of you we… we aren't…” Lucian trailed off.

Enkidu put a hand on their shoulder. “You're very welcome.”

“We’re here, it's okay Lucian. We’ll stay with you as long as you need.” Kadoc murmured, and was met with nods of agreement.

Lucian squirmed a bit, before hiding their face in Kadoc’s shoulder, ears slightly pink in embarrassment.

“Yeah… okay…” Their response was muffled.

Lucian would be alright. They would all make sure of it. And after they were alright, Gilgamesh would  _ personally _ ensure this wouldn’t happen again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gilgamesh you and Lucian are allergic to the word "friends", just admit it already.


	82. Band (Kadoc)

“Hey Kadoc! Can we borrow your clothes?”

Looking up from his latest book, Kadoc paused, and blinked as he realized his friend was still in their pajamas, a blanket bundled around their waist. Odd considering it was two in the afternoon. “Why?”

Lucian huffed and crossed their arms. “Some asshole dumped itching powder in ours. We need to go wash them and stuff, you know? The same asshole  _ also _ got some in our pajama pants, and we don't want to go out like this.”

Blinking once, then twice, Kadoc understood. His friend hated showing skin unless it was necessary, and he knew why. The scars on their arms and legs were too methodical to be obtained in a fight. He didn't know  _ exactly _ how they got them, and if they weren't going to share he wouldn't press. After Christmas, he could make an educated guess where they came from.

They were reluctant to show him on really good days, but even then, they refused to show their scars to anyone else, except Gilgamesh. And that was because Gilgamesh had seen them already due to the memory sharing. Even though their pajama shirt came down to their thighs, that was still too much skin for them. The scars went all the way down to their ankles after all. “…I could go wash them for you…?”

To his surprise, this just caused Lucian to pout. “No good, apparently the washing machines are broken today, We asked Gil to check for us… Convenient coincidence no? We wonder if the same person that dumped the powder in our clothes broke the washing machines too. Or if we just have the shittiest luck. Either one is possible to be honest…”

Convenient coincidence indeed… Too convenient. But then again, they  _ did _ have terrible luck.

“Alright. I think I have some clothes that would meet your standards…” Marking his spot on the book, he went to rifle through his set of drawers for an appropriate set. “How did they get your pajama pants with the stuff anyway?”

He hears Lucian scoff from behind him. “No idea. Especially since we were wearing them all night. If we had them we would have just gone out like this. We’re kind of sad, these are our favorite pair of pajamas.”

At the image of Lucian doing their normal activities in the pajamas they were currently wearing, he snorted. It made for a funny thought. Especially since this set was the rainbow sheep set. The  _ sparkling _ rainbow sheep set. Gilgamesh got that set as a joke. Unfortunately for him, Lucian took it in stride, declaring it their favorite set. Indeed, they did wear it the most.

Kadoc pulled out some dark pants, a maroon sleeveless turtleneck, and a black long sleeved shirt with a white abstract pattern on the side with a wide neck. He laid them out on the bed and called Lucian over to inspect them. “Is this fine?”

Wandering over to the bed, Lucian eyed the clothing critically. “Should be. We'll go change and be right back.”

They took the clothing into the bathroom, before shutting the door. After a few minutes they emerged. It looked good on them, even if the long sleeved shirt was bit loose in the sides.

“Seems like they fit okay. I'm glad.” Kadoc commented. Lucian beamed.

“Yes! We're going to go see if there's anything we can do to help fix the washing machines. Your clothes are nice but we don't want to impose too much on you!”

Chuckling softly, he smiled. “It's alright. What were your plans for today?”

Humming, Lucian sat on the bed cross legged. “Well, after we checked the washing machines, we were gonna hang out with Riri today! We think he wanted us to play cards with him and the others from the Grail War he fought in.”

...Riri. Who was that again? He didn’t have the faintest idea who that could be at all. It sounded like the nickname for a girl but knowing Lucian, it could be anyone. The blank incomprehension must have shown on his face because Lucian laughed. “Jekyll! The one with the split personality in his head we met in London! That one!”

“Jekyll?” Kadoc repeated faintly. He couldn't for the life of him figure out why they called Jekyll ‘Riri’ though…

Lucian grinned and nodded. “Yes!”

“Why do you call him that? I don't get it.” Kadoc asked simply.

Their look turned contemplative. “Well, Riri’s first name is Henry, remember? Simple!”

Kadoc didn't think it was simple at all, but at least he could follow the logic, especially as he heard how Lucian stressed the second syllable. But then again, he also thinks it's simpler just to use given names, instead of going out of their way to call everyone by something other than their first name…

“What are you doing today?” Lucian’s voice interrupted his thoughts, a curious expression on their face.

He shrugged. “I was going to spend some time with Jackie and Alice today. Atalanta is going to a minor singularity for supplies, and she asked me to watch them. I'm not sure exactly what they have planned.”

Lucian made a soft ‘oh’, before grinning. “Okay! Have fun!”

Chuckling, Kadoc checked the time and cursed. It was 9:45 AM and he was supposed to meet them at ten. Gathering his stuff, he bade Lucian farewell and ran to the meeting spot.

/////

Panting, Kadoc sagged into one of the booths at the Salon. Safe… He had five minutes to spare before ten AM. After bidding Lucian farewell, he ran to the Salon at the fastest run he could manage without keeling over. Tossing one arm over his face, he groaned.

Suddenly, he heard a giggle, before he was dog piled by both girls. Laughing as well, he hugged them both before sitting up, Jackie hanging off his neck like a limpet. “Good morning girls, what did you want to do today?”

Alice spoke up. “We want to color with you, look!” She pointed at the array of supplies on the table. Kadoc chuckled again and patted her head.

“Yeah Yeah!” Jackie called out, her legs thudding against the back of the booth. “Are your lovers coming today? Arty is fun to play pretend with, and Lu is good at telling us stories when they're in the mood for it!”

Kadoc snorted. It seems Jackie spent a bit too much time with Lucian, picking up on their penchant for nicknames. “No. Lucian is playing a game with Jekyll, and I think Arthur might be playing with them and the rest from that grail war.”

Jackie made a disappointed noise. “What about later? Do you think they'll play with us later?”

Kadoc shrugged as best he could with Jackie on his shoulder. “Maybe. Someone slipped itching powder into all of Lucian’s clothes, so they're probably going to get back at whoever did that first.”

“Awwww…” The girls said at the same time.

“Maybe if you ask nicely, Arthur will play with you later?” He offered.

Jackie crawled off his back and huffed. “Maybe. But right now we want to play with you!”

With a soft smile on his face, Kadoc nodded. He really loved the girls: he knew what it was like not to have much of a childhood. His parents made sure of that by heaping all of their expectations on him. Though, he didn't want to actually raise a child. No way. Lucian was enough of a child already.

“Alright girls, tell me what you wanted to color today…”

/////

After about two hours, both girls decided they were done coloring, and they got lunch. Afterwards, Alice wanted to go to the beach, and Jackie agreed. So after lunch, Kadoc carefully packed away the colored pencils and crayons for them both. Both girls were waiting impatiently for him to finish, and once he was done, they looped their arms with his.

“Kadoc! We should build a sand castle! It'll be fun! We can build one and show Momma!” Jackie said eagerly.

Sometimes Jackie really reminded him of Lucian. Thankfully, under Atalanta’s influence, she was acting less like them every day: Lucian was pretty mentally unstable, he wouldn't wish that on a kid. Or at least someone that mostly acted like a kid, ages for Heroic Spirits were  _ weird _ .

“Alright. We can build a sand castle if you want.”

Smiling at the cheers this received, he herded them to their rooms to drop off the coloring supplies and grab their bathing suits. They could always get changed in the changing rooms over there.

Twenty minutes later, he stepped out of the changing room in his swim trunks and a vest, and was tackled by both girls into the sand.

“Got you!” Alice sang from his ear.

“Yeah! Got you!” Jackie repeated.

Chuckling softly, he brought his hands to the closest girl, Jackie, and started to tickle her sides. With a shriek, she began to laugh as she tried to tickle him back, with little success. 

“Alice-! H-Hahahah-Help-!”

Kadoc gasped as Alice came to her sister’s aid, and they all tickled each other until both girls were out of breath. Giggling, Kadoc managed to keep himself under control before standing up. Giving himself a shake, he yelped as he felt both girls tackle him from behind, but he managed to keep his footing. He had lots of practice not faceplanting into the sand as Lucian was fond of tackling him as well. More proof Lucian was a child at heart.

/////

“Thank you for watching my girls Kadoc. You're very good with them both.”

Atalanta found them later building a pretty impressive sand castle, if Kadoc did say so himself. He blinked slowly as he looked up. She was very… pink today. Neither of the two girls he was watching had noticed yet, putting the finishing touches on one of the castle’s turrets.

“Thank you, I like spending time with them, but… what's the occasion?” He gestured to her pink bathing suit.

The huntress giggled softly, before laying out a towel and watching her surrogate kids argue over what they wanted to do for the castle next.

“You don't know? It's Valentine's day next week. A couple of people decided to get an early start.”

Valentine's day. Right. That was a thing, wasn't it? Oh god, what was he supposed to do about  _ that?! _

He looked up at the sound of giggling, and noticed both girls had moved away from the sand castle and were now giving their mom a hug, and all three were laughing. He dipped his head, trying to fight the embarrassment creeping up his cheeks.

“You're dating Arthur and Lucian right?” Alice leaned in, and whispered to him, “You should do something really nice for them Kadoc! If you need ideas my stories should have plenty!”

This was not what he had in mind for today. He still remembered pretty vividly what happened during the Christmas Ball, with the homophobic slurs being tossed around, and how  _ that _ night ended… He was afraid of letting most of Chaldea know about their relationship because of it. Only a couple of people knew about it, Atalanta and her girls being some of them.

“Thanks but no thanks Alice… I think Lucian would sooner walk around in shorts and a tank top than do something that's sappy romantic…”

Jackie pouted. “But you love them!” She whispered urgently. He dipped his head to hide the blush creeping up his face.

“Yeah. I do. But I'm scared, you know? I'm not as strong as either Arthur or Lucian, and remember Christmas? I'm scared because back… before Fuyuki, I was picked on a bit you know? I'm afraid that it's just something like that again… and it will make it worse…”

Kadoc yelped as he felt someone flick his forehead, and he pouted and rubbed the abused area as Atalanta was giving him an unimpressed look. “Jackie isn’t saying you need to kiss them silly in the halls. She’s just saying you should spend lots of time with both of them on that day. Just remind them how much you love them.” Jackie was nodding rapidly in agreement with her mother.

That's true… wasn't it… “Yeah… okay…”

Alice opened her mouth to say something else, but Atalanta shushed her. Kadoc nodded gratefully, this conversation was already slightly out of his comfort zone as it was. She expertly distracted both girls by asking what they did today as Kadoc tried to get himself comfortable again.

Gods. Valentine's day. What do you even do for that when you're dating a king and someone that would probably hide for a week before doing something traditionally romantic?!

/////

Kadoc spent several more hours with Atalanta and her girls. About an hour before dinner, Arthur wandered over to them, and Jackie asked if he could play pretend with her and Alice. He had agreed, and Kadoc wasn't sure what exactly they were pretending was happening, but they looked like they were having fun.

A loud shriek made all of them freeze, and Kadoc turned to see Mephistopheles and Merlin running towards them, Lucian hot on their heels. He watched as Lucian lunged for the nearest of the two, Mephistopheles, who didn't hesitate to trip Merlin as a distraction. He watched as Lucian tackled Merlin, before using their magecraft to snag Mephistopheles before he could get to far away.

“…Aren't those your clothes Kadoc?” Atalanta commented from where she was watching the minor scuffle.

Not taking his eyes off the chaos he nodded. Arthur spoke up next. “Yeah, Lucian showed up to the card game I was playing with the rest from my grail war in those. When Jekyll asked, all Lucian said was that someone was a very naughty child with a frankly disturbing expression on their face. No one else wanted to ask after that.”

“Lucian woke up with all of their clothing covered in itching powder.” Kadoc offered. “Seems like they found who was responsible.”

Arthur made a noise between amused and pained as the wrestling a few feet away continued. Both casters seemed distracted. He watched as Merlin squirmed as if… Wait a second… “Did those fools get itching powder on  _ themselves _ too?!” He demanded incredulously.

Atalanta snorted as Arthur choked on a laugh. “I think so. Lucian must have noticed and latched onto them like a bloodhound.”

Kadoc winced as he heard Jackie loudly cheering Lucian on and put his head in his hands and groaned.

“Sometimes Lucian is  _ such _ a child…”

He felt a small hand that could only be Alice’s (Jackie’s cheers for Lucian to slice Mephistopheles up were too far away for it to be her) pat his back in sympathy.

He loved them dearly but sometimes… sometimes he just wanted to (lightly) slap some sense into them. He wondered if that was a bad thing.

Probably.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merlin if you and Mephistopheles actually worked together instead of trying to outdo each other you might have gotten. Away with it. Smh.


	83. White (Dantes)

Honestly, Dantes had no idea why he even agreed to get coffee with the Chaldean Master that called themself Lucian. They were… alright, he supposed. Somewhat lacking in wrath, but otherwise alright. Out of the three Chaldean Masters, Lucian was the only one that had vengeance roiling within them. Not Gudao, who was determined to become his friend, and not Kadoc, the Master with a hidden core of steel. Lucian, the only one that called him by his preferred title, The Cavern King.

Dantes wanted to nurture that seed of vengeance deep within Lucian and have the Master display a wrath worthy of an avenger!

To that end, he was determined to figure out what wound up making the Master tick, and if that meant he had to go get coffee with them so be it. If that meant he had to pretend to be friends with Lucian, and act civilly towards them, so be it! He waited over a decade in the Château d'If! Waiting in order for one human to slip up and show him wrath would be easy in comparison!

Ha! Lucian assumed that they were becoming friends, how could he, an incarnate of wrath and vengeance be such? He was just trying to find the chink in the armor! The weak point!

Humming softly, his target pushed open the door to the coffee shop. The only reason they were able to make such a detour was that the source of this singularity was well hidden, eluding them for the several hours they had been here already. Gudao had determined that they should act as naturally as possible, while keeping an eye out for anything suspicious, as a singularity so close to the present day, no matter how minor, was quite unusual. It’s not like they were having much success finding the source by actively searching the area.

Hence, coffee.

Lucian bounced up the the waiter with a grin on their face, and, oh no. They did _not_. Letting out a sigh, he stepped up to the counter, ignoring Lucian’s attempts at ordering some sweet trash. Why even come to a coffee shop if you aren’t even going to get coffee?

“Ignore this idiot,” Dantes jerked a finger at Lucian. Lucian mimed being stabbed. Dantes ignored them. “I’m with them. One decaf coffee with only a little sugar, and one cup of the darkest brew you have.”

With a straight face, the waiter gives them both milk. Dantes feels his eyebrow twitch.

“Are you hard of hearing, perchance?” Dantes said quietly, his fury at this entire situation just burning underneath the surface.

“Nah man, you and your buddy are just being annoying.”  
  
“Changing an order before you even put it in is annoying now?!” Dantes hissed. “What kind of service is this?!”

Lucian started to laugh, and Dantes had no idea why. The Master found amusement in the weirdest things.

The waiter sighed, and left for a moment, and Dantes tried to calm himself. He shouldn’t make too much of a scene. At least the shop is empty, small mercies. While the waiter is gone, Lucian downs both glasses of milk.

The man comes back with a cup of ice water, and a neatly folded paper in front of it. The paper has two words on it: _Please Chill._

He feels his control snap, and tries very very hard not to just flip the entire counter over with a Servant’s strength. Hearing Lucian laughing like a madman somewhere behind him does not help matters.

“Are you deliberately doing this? Or are you just that incompetent?! Why the fuck are you doing this?!” He trails off into a litany of french curses, anger running hot in his veins. The man doesn’t even flinch as he gets angrier, which makes him even more angry. It’s a singularity in fucking modern france, and yet this guy isn’t even batting an eye!

“Look man, you need anger management classes, pronto. And your friend over there, he needs like, a psychiatrist. Stat.”

The laugher cuts off immediately. There’s a rustle of clothing, before Lucian slams down the required payment for the two milks they drank, and they grab Dantes’ collar, before dragging the servant out.

Tch. He knew about Lucian’s distaste of doctors, but he never bothered trying to use it against them. All that happens someone brings it up is distress them (he’s tried, then had to evade that golden archer that they’re close with for several hours after), and make them quiet and sad. That’s not interesting at all.

He’ll get that waiter back. The idiot set back his plans for coaxing out Lucian’s rage back by days, if not weeks!

Lucian drags them to where the golden archer is glaring at passersby, and the other Servant turns his glare onto him, only to turn his attention to Lucian once they say that it wasn’t his fault.

“Tch, I have things to do.” Dantes turned around, only to be stopped by the Servant making a scoffing noise.

“Really now.” The archer sounded incredulous.

“S-shut up-! Why would I care about this idiot Master that actually bothers to call me by my chosen title unlike the rest of them?! I’m just getting revenge on that man because he pissed me off! Lucian has nothing to do with it!”

“Uh-huh. _Sure_ you are. You don’t care about Lucian at _all_.” Archer rolled his eyes, sarcasm dripping off every word, before making shooing motion. “Whatever, you can lie to yourself all you want, I, the king, don’t care. Just get out of my sight!”

Not needing to be told twice, Dantes left, plans of vengeance already forming in his mind.

/////

When Gudao asked him later how he _knew_ that that was the source of the singularity, he kept the fact that he only magically dismantled the place out of revenge to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good job Dantes you played yourself.
> 
> In other news I'm dying because FGO NA decided to release 3 events back to back. Help me.


	84. Purpose (Cen and Lucian, Salieri)

The battle with the King of Demons was over, but not without sacrifices. Apparently the good doctor was the same grand caster from years ago from that very first Grail War. He wished to be human. No wonder they couldn't feel him. His aura as a human was completely different than as a Heroic Spirit. He had sacrificed himself in order to weaken the King of Demons by erasing himself from the Throne.

While everyone else was mourning, Cen and Lucian stayed away. Even after all this time, they still didn't like him, even if they felt bad the man was forced to sacrifice himself. All those years ago, he took Sanson away from them, taking away the first person that cared for them, and they never forgave him for that. They recognized it would be cruel of them if they at least didn't let other people mourn. Kyrielight saw him as a father figure, didn't she? Even Gil had grown to somewhat tolerate the good doctor.

They rounded a corner and amended their previous statement. Almost everyone else was mourning. There was one other that was not, as he had not known the man well enough. Chaldea’s newest arrival, an avenger class Servant. He had been summoned right before the final battle. The avenger had been forced to stay away from the battle because more often than not, he went into a murderous rage just being around Mozart: he wasn't dependable enough. Guda-kun said something like that, didn’t he? Ah, but the other avengers were also quite tetchy upon their summoning as well, weren’t they?

It reminded them of how they used to be, with so much hate towards their parents, particularly their dear old mother. Oh sure, they would still probably kill her if they had the chance, but they no longer thought about it all the time. How could they, when they could spend time with Gil and Kadoc and the others?

At the moment, the man was playing the piano in the empty Salon de Marie, the usual occupants elsewhere for now.

He was quite good, as expected of Mozart’s alleged rival. Though, he was practically flirting with danger, playing here. Mozart played there quite often after all.

Entering the room, they sat on the top of the piano and waited for him to finish. They got annoyed when people interrupted their singing, and they wasn't sure the Servant would be irritated by the interruption as well.

With a flourish, the man finished, and they clapped politely. The man paused, and scrutinized them closely, one hand on his chin before he spoke.

“You are… one of the Masters, are you not?”

“And you are Antonio Salieri, correct?” They responded.

The man gripped his bangs as if he was having a headache. “The Servant you summoned… aah, it’s not Salieri. Antonio Salieri, he's dead. He's already dead. Don't be mistaken. I am, who am I?”

Blinking calmly as the avenger spoke, Cen and Lucian took it in stride. “Not Salieri then. What do you want us to call you?”

“Who am I… who in the world am I…?” The man muttered to himself. “Not Salieri… I am death… I am darkness…”

They pitied this man. This avenger who didn't know who he was. They knew what that was like. How could they forget? It was so long ago, yet it was almost like it was yesterday. They remembered what that was like, and what they felt when they were given a name, a name they could call their own.

Propping their chin on one hand, they hummed. “Can we call you Tony? Tonio? Or Liri? Lieri? Or both? Would that be alright?”

He stopped gripping at his hair and looked at them in disbelief. They tilted their head and waited for him to respond.

After several minutes, he straightened up, an embarrassed flush on his face as he wiped imaginary dust off his coat. “…Tonio Lieri. Your naming choice is… unimaginative. However… I… I suppose that would be… acceptable. Close enough for this body… for I to recognize it… yet not the same.”

They grinned. “So Liri, what are you doing here? That man you dislike so much often comes here, you know.”

Liri’s fingers curled into the wood. “Gottlieb-! Gottlieb Mozart-! He comes here?”

They nodded, tilting their head to one side before propping it up with their hand. “Yes. We guess you didn't know, since you decided to come, right? You probably didn't know since people have been in mourning lately.”

“Mourning… for Gottlieb-?!”

Putting up their hands in a placating gesture, they shook their head. “No no, not for him. For the doctor. Fluffy orange hair in a ponytail? Ring any bells?”

Liri peered through his fingers, eyes darting back and forth has he visibly tried to claw back to sanity. “A little. Maybe. I have… I have not seen him lately.”

Sighing, they extended a hand to Liri. “We shouldn't have this conversation here. We should go elsewhere, we know a place where we won't be disturbed.”

After a moment, he nodded, and let Cen and Lucian pull him up.

/////

They wound up taking Liri to the Game Room. Mozart avoided the place like the plague, citing that the music was an insult. Taking a seat on the back of the couch, they hummed.

“Are you aware of the battle that was fought recently Liri?” When the Servant shook his head, they continued. “It turned out the good old doctor was a Heroic Spirit who wished on a grail to become human. The person behind all this mess was using his old body, and as a result, in order to weaken the enemy, the good doctor erased himself from the Throne of Heroes. People are mourning him now.” It was a heavily abridged version of events, but they didn’t care.

Liri steepled his fingers and rested his elbows on his knees. “But not you.”

They nodded. “Not us. We don't like doctors. And we dislike him too. When he was still a Heroic Spirit, he took away the one person that cared for us. So yeah, we… never really liked him.”

“…He did not seem like the kind of person to wantonly destroy humans.” Liri commented.

“Oh. The person that cared for us was Sanson. He was summoned into the same Holy Grail War as the doctor.” They sighed and closed their eyes, before giving themself a slight shake.

“I see… I did not know the doctor well enough to mourn.”

“That's alright. We didn't think you did.”

“I just realized, I don't know your name. Just that you're one of the Masters here…”

They laughed.

……

Lucian. That was how his current conversation partner introduced… himself? He wasn't completely sure that was right, if he recalled properly, someone else called Lucian “them”. Which was right?

Tonio Lieri. It was a name he would need to get used to. While Lucian was uncreative when suggesting a name, it wasn't a bad one. Unlike when the others called him Salieri, this name did not cause him to question who he was.

He wasn't Salieri, Salieri was dead. He was an “Innocent Monster” the Man in Grey. The man that killed Mozart.

“Lucian… what pronouns do you use? I'm not quite sure and I do not wish to offend.” Yes, that would be a poor way to treat the one that tried to make him feel less fragmented.

Lucian hummed, before responding. “They and them, usually. But we aren't too picky, as long as you don't go for ‘it’.”

Ah. So that's how it was.

“I see. Also… why do you call me Liri? Instead of Tonio or Lieri? Why even give me a chance after I… after I tried to kill… the man beloved by god…”

The Master chuckled happily. “We give nicknames to everyone!” Their face sobered. “We know what it's like, to not know who you are. Even that hatred… it reminds us of ourselves. We hate someone too, but we don't think about it as much now. Why should we, when we can spend time with our… friends instead?”

Tonio nodded, even if he could not imagine not hating… the man beloved by god. Other than that… Nothing. He, has nothing. He looks up to where Lucian is waiting patiently, still except for their fingers tapping on their knee.

“I find it… hard to believe, you have such hatred… From what I have seen of you… you are always so cheerful.” He says softly. The second the words were out of his mouth, he grimaced. “Please… forget I said that. It was rude of me.”

Letting out a sigh, Lucian shifted so they were no longer sitting on the couch cushions, instead balancing on their toes on the back of the couch. “It's alright. We weren't always like this. According to Kadoc, we were nasty pieces of work when we first met him, angry at everyone and everything.”

Kadoc… who was that again? He couldn't remember.

“Kadoc’s the one with piercings in his neck and white hair.”

Ah. The confusion must have been quite obvious.

“Do you wanna play a game Liri? We’re bored, and we like games. Games are fun.”

Blinking at the sudden topic change, Tonio nodded. “Though, I'm not quite sure how. You might need to teach me.”

Lucian grinned.

/////

This… game was… interesting. He wasn't quite sure what the point of racing around one of the oddest roads he had ever seen was. It was… alright.

“Liri?”

Tonio looked up at where Lucian was curled on the back of the couch like a bird of prey. He set down the controller.

“Yes? What is it?”

He was unsure why Lucian tried to get his attention.

“It’s about the man you hate-”

Whatever Lucian said next was inaudible as a haze of red crept into his vision at the hated name. Gottlieb, Mozart-!

No-! He couldn't-! Not here-! Grabbing at his face, he groaned loudly.

He felt himself be knocked to the floor, pinned there by some weight. As the haze slowly ebbed away without a visible target for it, he was able to see Lucian had pinned him to the floor, a frown on their face. He felt shame crawl up his cheeks at the loss of control, and he looked away.

“You okay?”

He nodded, and Lucian pulled him back onto the couch. They looked incredibly serious at the moment.

“I apologize… Sometimes… just the mention of Mozart is enough to send me into a rage… but not always. The sight of him always sends me into a murderous haze…” He murmured. Lucian nodded.

“As we were saying. Your hate. We think you should try and temper it. It is not his fault you turned out this way. We found out that taking out your anger on those that don't deserve it solves nothing. If you can do that, you can become your own person, instead of a shadow of hatred.”

Becoming his own person… that sounded appealing to him. Who was he? If he knew, if he could make his own way… the idea had merit.

“Ah, we see you like that idea.” Lucian commented.

“How… how can I… do that?” He murmured softly.

“Well, the first step, instead of seeking him out, try and avoid him. As much as you can. If you can't, try to not put on that armor of yours, and remove yourself from his presence. If you can, ask someone to help you physically remove you from his presence. We won't lie to you, it'll be hard. But the more you try, the easier it will become.”

Tilting his head back against the couch, Tonio sighed. “You make it seem so easy.”

Snorting, Lucian shook his head. “It won't be. In fact, the first couple of days, we might wind up doing the physical restraining ourselves.”

When he… attacked the man beloved by god… he was blocked by… other Servants? But they couldn't be there all the time. Neither could Lucian.

“You called that… the first step.” Tonio prompted.

“Yeah. The next step is trying to find a hobby, or a bunch of hobbies! Salieri was a pianist, but that doesn't mean you have to be! Experiment a little!”

Hobbies huh… He supposed… trying to kill Gottlieb did not leave much time for that…

Looking down at his hands, he sighed.

“Well, you don't have to decide right away. This is a pretty life altering decision. Or is it death altering-? Not sure how that works for Heroic Spirits…”

“No-!” He said emphatically, before taking several deep breaths. “No. I mean… I'll try it, and try to make it work.”

“Excellent, Excellent. We’ll start tomorrow!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He's going to be referred to as Tonio Lieri for the rest of the fic, that includes future chapters where he narrates.  
> Several of Tonio's lines in his first conversation with Lucian were lifted directly from his in game translated dialogue.


	85. Transition (Tonio)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please do not attempt what advice Lucian gives to Tonio at home.  
> Also features french swears.

Tonio took a deep breath. According to Lucian, the first thing he should do is try and figure out what, aside from the sight of Mozart, sent him into a rage. Lucian had asked if it was alright for them to attempt to figure out what enraged him by tossing random ideas around. They warned it would be more difficult to work through his rage without doing that, but also less painful, as they would be deliberately bringing up things that had the potential to anger him.

Tonio desperately wanted this idea to work: the others here did not attempt to work through it with him, instead just separating him from Mozart by force whenever they crossed paths and nothing else. Was because of lack of time or something else? Ah, Lucian did state that Chaldea was preparing for a major battle when he was summoned, did they not? That could account for that. That still did not change the fact that Lucian was the first to reach out towards him.

He doubted his situation could worsen much more if Lucian did this, so he might as well go for the, “ripping a bandaid off a fresh wound method,” as Lucian had described it.

To figure that out, he was sitting in what Lucian said was a Training Room with the Master bringing up Mozart in various states of conversation as they used trial and error to figure out what were safe topics and what were not.  


So far, in Lucian’s scratchy handwriting, there were a few things listed on the page underneath the heading of “Things that Trigger Rage”.

Mentioning people mourning Mozart   
Mentioning Mozart’s works while he was playing piano   
Mentioning Mozart when he is in certain moods (moods yet to be determined)   
The sight of Mozart   
Implying he is not allowed to kill Mozart   
Not being allowed to destroy Mozart’s things   
When people play Mozart’s works   
Attributing Salieri’s works to Mozart

Lucian tapped the pen to the paper and sighed. “That should be enough for now. We don't think we can do anything about some of these, but others, we need to work on… lessening the reaction. It's fine, you probably won't ever like Mozart. But we need to try and prevent you from flying into a murderous rage. If you can just curse him out colorfully in your head as an outlet, that might work instead? Or imagine Mozart meeting many gruesome sticky ends. Trying to make you a paragon of love is impossible, it's all about channeling those feelings into things that aren't actively destructive. Destructive thoughts should be fine, as long as they remain thoughts and don't become actions, in our opinion.”

Tonio blinked, not quite sure how to process that logic. He had a feeling it was not advice other people would give. But then again, their rhythm was even more unique than the even other humans’.

“Do you know any places where Mozart does not frequently spend time that I might like?”

They grinned at him. “We know a couple. We’ll show you.”

/////

Lucian had led them to a large mostly circular room with floor to ceiling windows, with couches in soft creams and a crimson carpet underneath. Their nose wrinkled as the smell of cigarette smoke permeated the room. A few couches were pushed up against the windows, and another spirit was reclining on one, eyes closed and head tilted back slightly. A cigarette was between his lips and a few more were in the ashtray in front of him, indicating he was the source of the smell.

Lucian sighed, walked over to the Servant, and snatched the cigarette from his mouth.

The man seemed familiar… It's as if this Servant’s rhythm was similar to his.

“Hey-!” The Servant snapped, golden eyes snapping open. “Oh, it's you. Casse-toi, I'm busy, give that back.”

Tonio stared at the casual swearing. His knowledge of contemporary french from the grail told him it was a rather vulgar swear.

“Connard.” Lucian replied easily, one eyebrow arched. “You should smoke these cancer sticks somewhere that has ventilation. Like outside.”

“Je m’en fous, it’s not like anyone else uses this room asides from myself since it's so out of the way.” A dark tendril tried to swipe the cigarette from Lucian’s hands but the mage danced out of the way.

Lucian rolled their eyes. “Yeah well, you don't own it. Get over yourself, salaud.” Turning to Tonio, Lucian inclined their head. “This is Liri. Liri, this is Eamon. You’re both avengers, so play nice!”

Eamon, whatever his name actually was, flipped Lucian off. Lucian stubbed the still lit cigarette into the ashtray and stuck out their tongue as they ducked out of the way of another shadowy tendril. Tonio felt a bit awkward as the two started what seemed to be a game of keep away with the now extinguished cigarette.

After several minutes, Eamon groaned and sank back into the couch, muttering more vulgar swears in french as he rubbed one hand over his eyes. “Ugh fine, what do you want?”

“From you? Nothing. We're just showing Liri around. That's all.”

The other Servant squinted at him. “Aren't you the guy that was recently summoned? Who are you anyway? I don't think I got your name. Knowing Lucian, the chance of ‘Liri’ actually being your full name is slim to none.”

Tonio put one arm to his waist and bowed awkwardly. “My name is An- no, Tonio Lieri, avenger-class. What about yourself?”

“Edmond Dantes, the King of the Cavern, avenger. What were you about to say before?”

Tonio sighed. He knew this was going to happen. “Antonio Salieri- the name of this Saint Graph. But I'm not him, Salieri is dead, has been dead, and I'm not him…”

Dantes looked like he was about to respond, but shut his mouth.

He startled as Lucian clapped their hands together, and Tonio turned toward them. “This is officially the lounge, but ever since Salon de Marie was built, it's fallen into disuse. The only person that comes here regularly is Eamon! It's a nice quiet place if you just need some alone time.”

So Mozart doesn't come here, that's good to know.

“What's the next place-?”

Dantes raised a brow, before grabbing a hat lying on the arm of the couch he was on and standing up. “Wait you're actually giving a tour? I'm curious.”

Tonio saw Lucian open their mouth, and had a feeling if they responded, they would start squabbling again. “Lucian is showing me places where Mozart is unlikely to be that I may like.”

“So where have they taken you so far?” Dantes asked.

“Just here, I'm not sure where else they had in mind.”

“We only had a handful of others, Eamon, if you have any more ideas, feel free to pitch in!”

/////

The next place was outside, past the entrance for a graveyard for the personnel lost in an explosion. The worn stone path was well hidden behind a tree jutting out of a rock formation, and the path descended down the cliff face, then went up through the mountain, before opening up on a wide shelf of rock overlooking the facility.

Dantes whistled lowly as Lucian snuffed out the red light that lit the way. “Wow, how did you even find this place? It’s quite a walk… Not to mention it’s quite dark in the tunnel.”

It  _ was _ quite a walk, that would explain why it was so secluded.

Lucian laughed. “We saw the path behind the rocks one day and were curious where it went! It’s really quiet up here, we tend not to spend time here but we remembered how to get here! There’s a branching path about halfway up that wraps around to another area like this that overlooks the sea instead!”

He remembered seeing that pathway, half-hidden in the dim red light of Lucian’s little bauble.

“You aren’t the type to explore though, especially not to find quiet places like this.” Dantes commented.

Lucian shrugged. “We were playing hide-and-seek with Gil. He couldn’t find us up here.”

Gil-? Tonio wasn’t quite sure who exactly that was, but they sounded quite close. He wasn’t very familiar with most of the servants around here actually…

“That’s… a lot more believable.” Dantes muttered. He got a snicker in response.

“Wait, who is Gil? Forgive me, I’m not that familiar with everyone here yet.”

“He’s Gilgamesh, an archer-class Servant.” Dantes clarified.

Lucian hummed, before adding “He’s our friend. He’s also got an ego larger than this mountain. He’s mellowed out a bit though.”

That… sounded like someone he wouldn’t want to meet.

When he didn’t respond further, Lucian took that as an invitation to continue. “There are a lot of nooks and crannies like this if you look, but we’re not sure if most of them are as sheltered from the elements as this one…”

The Master skipped to the edge, dangling both legs back and forth over the cliff. Tonio was worried: what if Lucian fell off? It was a long drop down…

“Don’t.” Dantes said simply from beside him. He was confused, what did the other Servant mean? Golden eyes must have caught the confusion on his face, before Dantes elaborated. “Worry that they’ll fall. They’re remarkably good at landing on their feet, the worst thing that could happen is they’ll curse using every swear they know on the way down, but be fine overall.”

Humming some unidentifiable tune, Lucian stood up and spun on their heel. “We have a few other places to show you! Let’s go, quick quick! Before dinner-!”

Lucian was so full of energy, it was a bit hard to keep up with at times… but it was… kind of nice? It was different, but a nice kind of different.

/////

Tonio groaned as he collapsed underneath one of the palm trees in the shaded alcove inside the beach area. Lucian had shown him several places both inside and outside the facility, and he was exhausted. His Servant parameters weren’t that strong. Actually, they were so weak without the Wailing Facade, Lucian could easily outmatch him in strength, stamina, and everything. Dantes had joined them for the rest of the tour, and based on a few glimpses of shocked faces of people they passed, that was unusual for the other avenger.

Once, Lucian frowned, and hustled them off in a completely different direction than they were headed. Tonio suspected, but couldn’t confirm, that they could tell that their previous path would have taken them into contact with Mozart.

“Please tell me this is the last stop…” He groaned.

Lucian giggled. “Yep! Last place! This place is really pretty to watch the false sunset from!”

Thank goodness, he wasn't sure if his feet could take anymore walking without the Wailing Facade, which he wanted to avoid.

Groaning, he threw one arm over his eyes and sighed.

“Hey, Liri! Are you joining us for dinner?”

Raising himself up on one arm, he grumbled. “No. I don't want to move right now. Just maybe take a nap here until I get feeling in my legs.”

“Okay! Bye Liri! We’ll leave you be for now! See you tomorrow!”

He weakly raised a hand in acknowledgement before he sighed. Maybe he would just rest for a bit…

/////

Lucian was right, the sunset from here was rather nice, the light filtered into the clearing and the view was phenomenal.

“Oh, you're still here.” A familiar voice spoke up from behind him.

“Dantes.” He acknowledged.

The other avenger sat down on a flat rock, looked around, before he lit up another cigarette. They sat together in silence before Dantes broke it.

“Lucian means well, even if they're pretty hyper.”

Tonio nodded. “Yes, I figured. Their advice is unorthodox, but it's worth a try.”

Dantes puffed his cigarette, and the two avengers drifted off into amiable silence, staying there long after night fell and the false stars twinkled in the sky. Dantes stood up and brushed off his coat, stubbed his cigarette out on the rock, and then offered a hand to pull Tonio up, which he accepted.

“Goodnight Tonio. See you around.”

“Goodnight Dantes.”

Dantes waved as he left. Tonio lingered just a few moments longer, before heading to bed, more hopeful about his time in Chaldea than before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks AO3 for crashing when I posted this and made it double post this chapter smh


	86. Shift (Kadoc)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short break (?) from the Salieri arc.

_ “Worthless.” _

_ “Third rate magus.” _

_ “Trash.” _

Those words and more bounced back and forth in Kadoc’s head. All his life he had been told that he was worthless, first because he was the unwanted second son, then because he wasn’t as good as his brother. When he was sent to the Clock Tower at the age of fifteen, it didn’t get any easier. He learned that even then, he was an average magus with below average power. He was practically an insult to his lineage, which was impressive considering his lineage was nothing special. So he tried to work hard, but all that got him was long sleepless nights and nothing to show for it except some nasty dark circles under his eyes. All of his spells were mediocre, and took more effort than he should need.

Of course, all his peers noticed, and kept demeaning him for it, and not always subtly either.

He hated it.

The only solace he had was his room nowadays. He’s not quite sure  _ what _ Lucian did, but after someone tried to break in to mess with his things (subtly, of course), the door was always trapped.

Even Lucian was good at magecraft, and that made him burn with jealousy, especially since he hadn’t seen Lucian practice on improving their craft at all. For once in his life, he didn’t want to be worthless.

Pushing open the door to his room, he saw Lucian sitting on the back of the assigned desk chair, reading a textbook. Human biology again. He had no idea why Lucian was so fascinated with the subject: when he asked, Lucian simply said they were “curious about something” and left it at that. They had been “curious” about whatever it was for about a year and a half now.

Lucian tilted their head as he shut the door and put down his books with a bit more force than necessary onto the desk. “What’s got you so bothered?”

Should he tell them? If it was anyone else asking, he would say nothing, but… Lucian had never belittled him for not being a good magus. If anyone could understand, it would be them.

Taking a deep breath, he sat down on the chair so he could lay his arms atop the back, wondering how to start. Lucian was still reading, but that was fine. They were good at multitasking, the few times they did attend class they would frequently be reading and still be able to keep up with the lecture.

“No matter what I do, I won’t be good enough.” He grumbled.

Lucian shut the book with a snap and turned to face him fully, before canting their head. “For who?”

“The Mage’s Association. At this rate, I’m never going to advance beyond Frame… Besides you, everyone looks down on me because of it…”

Yet another reason for his peers to look down on him. He’d been here for two and a half years, and he still hasn’t advanced beyond Frame…

“Why do you let words of people that you don’t care about dictate how worthy or unworthy you are? We don’t get it. It sounds stupid”

“It’s the  _ Mage’s Association _ . It’s  _ only  _ the most influential magus organization in the world.” Kadoc grumbled. Lucian shrugged.

“Yeah but, dancing to someone else’s tune won’t make you happy. If you ask us, being happy is more important than whatever status you have.” He opened his mouth to say that if he had more status he would be happier, but Lucian cut him off. “You’re gonna say something like ‘if I had more status I’d be happier than I am now’, weren’t you? Maybe for a little while you would be, but then you’d need to get even more status to get happy again. It’s just a cycle where you’re only happy if you have status, and in our opinion, that’s not happiness at all.”

Kadoc frowned, thinking about it. All his life he was told that if he wasn’t magically powerful he wasn’t worth anything, but then here came Lucian, who just let the slurs tossed at them roll off their back like nothing, saying that it was possible to be happy outside of the Association. He didn’t get it at all.

“We mean, you can go for it if you want, but we just think it won’t bring you real happiness. Ever since we stopped caring about what people we don’t care about thought about us we became much happier. They just don’t  _ matter _ , so why should their opinions matter?”

It was almost unsettling hearing something like that coming from a self-proclaimed non-magus, but they didn’t actively look down upon others, whereas several magi would have, citing that they didn’t have good breeding, and therefore bad magical ability, or something else.

He fell into a contemplative silence. When he didn’t respond, Lucian shrugged and turned back to whatever they were doing before he entered, dog-earing specific pages in the text.

Was it possible to become happy independent of the Mage’s Association? Most of him was saying no, it wasn’t, but another, much smaller part pointed at Lucian as an example. They seemed relatively happy with life, at least a lot more than they were when they first arrived at the Clock Tower, and they didn’t bend to the Association’s rules at all. They were also still a Frame, but they didn’t get hassled like he did once word spread that they almost received a Sealing Designation before they even arrived.

As far as the Clock Tower’s gossip went, Lucian was an aberration: still a Frame, yet dangerous enough to receive a Sealing Designation if they caused too much trouble. Considering after the first year, they hadn’t caused much trouble, Kadoc wasn’t sure if the threat still applied, but the mere whisper of someone with the potential for that was still in the minds of their peers.

Was it because Lucian was powerful that they could ignore the Mage Association and still be happy? He didn’t know. He needed to think about it…

That small part of him was reminding him that he tried to work hard in order to please the Clock Tower, but all he got for his efforts was scorn when those efforts didn’t pan out.

Maybe trying to seek happiness independent of the Association was worth a try, it couldn’t possibly get any worse…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's block + event burnout + Camelot incoming is fun.
> 
> This is one of several events that leads to this verse's Kadoc changing from canon!Kadoc. In my opinion, from what we see of canon!Kadoc, he never really learned he could be happy unless it pertained to his ability as a magus. He talks about how other magi see him as less than human, and how he worked hard, and how those who were strong despised him. He also talks about doing a lot of work just to bring himself up to other people's starting point.
> 
> He sort of was getting there with his relationship with Anastasia, working towards her goal instead, but then she sacrificed herself for him before it really sunk in that he could be happy independent of his ability as a magus.

**Author's Note:**

> Giving ratings to fics is hard.


End file.
